Please help, my son is tearing my marriage apart.

[jessieblue1973]

I have an 8 year old step son with a severe mental disorder. He is violent, screams at me, hits his sister, beats up neighborhood kids, flips over furniture, has given me a black eye twice, and kicked and punched me countless times. I love my husband, and his 10 year old daughter to death. But I can't live with this child anymore, so I told my husband today, if he doesn't get the child some sever immediate help, like now, than I"m leaving. I've been abused all my life, and I'll be darned if I"m going to let an 8 yr old boy abuse me another day. What should I do? OR should I just walk away for my own sanity?

[MyBerrieOwn]

Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) Usually when a child is abandoned by anyone they trusted at birth. I thought my step-son was going to kill me or my daughter...turns out, my instincts were right. Please research it. This is a dangerous situation for all involved. He is TRYING to run you off. Don't let him win. I know it sounds impossible right now, but it CAN be fixed. Please contact me if you need further help. You think it's YOU that's crazy but it's not. My experience might be of some use. I'm so sorry for you, sweetie :(

[clewis]

You have to take in consideration that the child has a mental disorder.  I am going through the same thing with my children and their behavior. I have had my child evaluated and several test but I had to put her in a behavior hospital to get this under control, it was the hardest thing I had to do and it was heartbreaking but it was for the safety and sanity of her and my family. They did a very good job with her and got her on the right path and right medication, she has a mood disorder and she is manic depression, the medication may or may not be life long and it has to be done with therapy and help, it takes time and it will all fall together, your husband needs to realize the safety of his child and others now and for the future. I hope this helps you and good luck.

[Sandman2]

If the child doesn't get professional help, it will just get worse, and worse, and worse.  I surprised the schools have not said the same thing.  Sometimes, you have to make statements like you made to get people moving.  You might even have to move out for awhile to show you mean it if your hubby still refuses to get the child some help.  This is not something that you can deal with by yourself.  If he refuses to get help for the child, than he is also refusing to help you.  Good Luck

[Rucnfun]

your married to the child's dad right? then you stay with him!! you have made a commitment to be together through thick and thin! dont leave. you need to stay and get this child help. dont just walk away when times get tough, thats not setting a very good examle for the kids. he needs evaluation and possible treatment. but for now I would try to prevent these outbursts from happening by not letting him play with the neighborhood kids.