Aa
Repetitive behaviors
Hi
I have a tendency to repeat certain behaviors. This can be extremely time-consuming and is enormously stressful (and embarrassing, and distressing, etc). The behaviors can cause bleeding, pain, infection and tardiness, etc.
Worse than the behaviors are thoughts that repeat themselves. There is a desperate need to continue behaviors until I have counted the right number or completed specific alphabetical sequences or it feels right.
I have previously been diagnosed with severe depression, anxiety (GAD, NOS) and bpd.
I have emotional difficulties regarding medication and I am generally non-compliant.
Over 12 months ago I was prescribed 30 mg of Buspirone but discontinued it due to debilitating fatigue.
I did decrease the dose but then it was said to be sub-clinical.
I'm not sure what my question is.
Treatment for this behavior?? A possible time-frame? Is it treatable?
I have been in therapy but are not currently. My previous T left the mhs last September.
I was told that one way to reduce the behavior was to do mindless activities mindfully. I think the behavior did decrease (I'm not sure why exactly: taking medication, mindfulness strategies, decreasing asthma medication and caffeine, ...??)
Is the anxiety causing this behavior the same as that for the pd?
My understanding is that part of that anxiety is created by un-integrated splits.
I am tired of this behavior affecting and dictating my life. I have been having strong suicidal thoughts and urges but they are possibly the cumulative affect of severe stress and other issues.
J
I have a tendency to repeat certain behaviors. This can be extremely time-consuming and is enormously stressful (and embarrassing, and distressing, etc). The behaviors can cause bleeding, pain, infection and tardiness, etc.
Worse than the behaviors are thoughts that repeat themselves. There is a desperate need to continue behaviors until I have counted the right number or completed specific alphabetical sequences or it feels right.
I have previously been diagnosed with severe depression, anxiety (GAD, NOS) and bpd.
I have emotional difficulties regarding medication and I am generally non-compliant.
Over 12 months ago I was prescribed 30 mg of Buspirone but discontinued it due to debilitating fatigue.
I did decrease the dose but then it was said to be sub-clinical.
I'm not sure what my question is.
Treatment for this behavior?? A possible time-frame? Is it treatable?
I have been in therapy but are not currently. My previous T left the mhs last September.
I was told that one way to reduce the behavior was to do mindless activities mindfully. I think the behavior did decrease (I'm not sure why exactly: taking medication, mindfulness strategies, decreasing asthma medication and caffeine, ...??)
Is the anxiety causing this behavior the same as that for the pd?
My understanding is that part of that anxiety is created by un-integrated splits.
I am tired of this behavior affecting and dictating my life. I have been having strong suicidal thoughts and urges but they are possibly the cumulative affect of severe stress and other issues.
J
I was just wondering what the ?implications were when the parent is doing the picking (pulling, squeezing, scratching, etc) to the child.
It almost suggests there are elements in the child the parent detests. ?? Does that mean they also were bullied/ picked on?
Would the book you recommended be worth investing in?
Were you suggesting that ocd was associated with abuse and trauma? Does trauma (and/ or abuse) underlie every anxiety?
J
It almost suggests there are elements in the child the parent detests. ?? Does that mean they also were bullied/ picked on?
Would the book you recommended be worth investing in?
Were you suggesting that ocd was associated with abuse and trauma? Does trauma (and/ or abuse) underlie every anxiety?
J
Perhaps I'm in denial about any abuse or trauma. It could be that I minimize these aspects of my life.
I've had nightmares since I was, I say, 9, but possibly even younger.
C-PTSD seems to fit too. (I did a Wikipedia search). I feel I can relate to most of the elements: captivity, psychological fragmentation, loss of sense of safety, trust, self-worth, tendency to be re-victimized and loss of a coherent sense of self.
Other points that were made that were of interest to me:
-pervasive negative impact of chronic repetitive trauma
-increased attachment in the face of danger
-compulsive repetition of the trauma [this is something I did when I was younger to other people]
-gaining control over ones current life
-timing, intensity and duration of the abuse [affecting/ influencing bpd diagnosis]
I'll see if there's a copy of that book at our local library.
It sounds unethical. On a personal level it makes me feel unsafe. Or rather it makes therapy feel unsafe or threatening for me.
It's possible he would be professional but it feels very awkward and uncomfortable for me.
Out of all the options the T suggested, this is the only one the doctor/ director made available to me.
The question I now have to ask myself is, is this better than nothing?
Currently, I don't think anything is worth it. Not really. Is some sort of illusion, perception or expectation of life worth this degree of hurt, hardship and heartache??
J
I've had nightmares since I was, I say, 9, but possibly even younger.
C-PTSD seems to fit too. (I did a Wikipedia search). I feel I can relate to most of the elements: captivity, psychological fragmentation, loss of sense of safety, trust, self-worth, tendency to be re-victimized and loss of a coherent sense of self.
Other points that were made that were of interest to me:
-pervasive negative impact of chronic repetitive trauma
-increased attachment in the face of danger
-compulsive repetition of the trauma [this is something I did when I was younger to other people]
-gaining control over ones current life
-timing, intensity and duration of the abuse [affecting/ influencing bpd diagnosis]
I'll see if there's a copy of that book at our local library.
It sounds unethical. On a personal level it makes me feel unsafe. Or rather it makes therapy feel unsafe or threatening for me.
It's possible he would be professional but it feels very awkward and uncomfortable for me.
Out of all the options the T suggested, this is the only one the doctor/ director made available to me.
The question I now have to ask myself is, is this better than nothing?
Currently, I don't think anything is worth it. Not really. Is some sort of illusion, perception or expectation of life worth this degree of hurt, hardship and heartache??
J
MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL
I was impressed that many people with similar problems have histories of abuse and trauma either major or somewhat subtle but nonetheless quite destructive versions. You might google 'complex PTSD' and see if it rings bells. Another good resource is the book Trauma and Recovery by Dr. Judith Herman.
"Currently I have been offered one session per week with the husband of the T I had issues with. "
Does this sound worth a try or too poisoned by the wife problem?
"My GP feels input and therapy from outside the local service would be appropriate. "
This sounds worth following up on.
"There is also a very small chance that the service may fund an intensive six month program at a private clinic."
If this turns out to be an option let me know the details.
tg
"Currently I have been offered one session per week with the husband of the T I had issues with. "
Does this sound worth a try or too poisoned by the wife problem?
"My GP feels input and therapy from outside the local service would be appropriate. "
This sounds worth following up on.
"There is also a very small chance that the service may fund an intensive six month program at a private clinic."
If this turns out to be an option let me know the details.
tg
In your first response you asked about an abuse history. Do you have time to briefly explain the significance of this? I don't understand what it is I need to work through with this.
J
J
MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL
Keep pushing for what you feel is most likely to work. Certainly consider other systems if available. The picking is definitely related to both OCD and BDD. It also goes with having been picked on growing up. See grossbart.com for more details.
tg
tg
Whoops sorry I forgot to ask.
I have read some of the posts about compulsive picking, etc. I have had a tendency to do stuff (pull hairs, pick, scratch, whatever) after I developed facial hairs from taking asthma meds.
Is this ocd related behavior or is it possible it could be bdd? I was just wondering. Was curious and interested.
J
I have read some of the posts about compulsive picking, etc. I have had a tendency to do stuff (pull hairs, pick, scratch, whatever) after I developed facial hairs from taking asthma meds.
Is this ocd related behavior or is it possible it could be bdd? I was just wondering. Was curious and interested.
J
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