my friend is crazy

[Babyg92]

so wants to fake a paternity test because she doesn't want the guy she's with to leave her. can she fake it? is there anyway i can prevent that because i don't think its fair she wants a guy to raise another guys kid.

[AnnieBrooke]

Tell your baby's daddy, and then leave it at that.  He will think it all over I am sure.

[Babyg92]

well he told me he is only with her because she's pregnant. they always fight and he says he can't stand her but puts up with her for the baby. and when she told me it wasn't his and couldn't be but she wanted to lie anyways so theydont break up i had to tell him because i would want to know if the baby was mine or not. i have no idea but i at least warned him. his my babys daddy 's cousin thats why.

[AnnieBrooke]

Baby, he might simply want to be a dad.  He might not in his heart care if the baby is his, maybe he is just totally into her and being a daddy and having a baby.  We've heard from guys on this site who are really, really disappointed when a baby is not theirs.  He might be one of those.  Just keep it all in mind for the future, if they break up you could try to clue him in again.  It might not bother him to help pay for the child now, if he is living with her and playing house with the child, but it would be unfair of her to try for child-support money from him if they are no longer in a relationship.  That would be when to speak up again.

[Babyg92]

ok thank you. i told him he should take her to court because i warned him but he says its his and he doesn't want to do all that. that they want a regular home dna test. but thank yo for the advice.

[AnnieBrooke]

If this will be done at a lab certified by the courts to determine paternity for child-support purposes, he will be expected to arrive and show ID.  I don't think that is easy to fake -- it would take outright theft (of her boyfriend's ID) and collusion by her side guy, who would have to go in and fradulently represent himself as being her boyfriend.  Frankly I can't imagine him going through that.  And of course, he would inevitably tell the story to at least one buddy, and the word would get out.  What a road to paranoia for her if she tried to engineer this.  

But if she is going to try to talk her boyfriend into just doing a drugstore test and not a court-certified test, she could probably engineer a fake of that test if she tried hard enough, by swapping the swab or something like that.

If her boyfriend is smart, he will insist on the DNA test being done by a properly court-certified lab.  (If child support is on the line he will have to go that route.)

If you want to mess around in their drama, you could clue him to use a court-certified lab.  Or you could just mind your own business. The case for minding your own business is pretty strong.  For one thing, your girlfriend might change her mind and come clean with him.  For another, they might break up and she will tell him then.  Finally, he has a lot of time to wonder if the baby is his and to ponder why she insisted on a drugstore test.  His buddies will also be after him to insist on a reliable DNA test.  He might figure it out by himself.

[Babyg92]

she knows for a fact that guy is not the babys father. this guy she messed around with behind his back is. i told her about this site but she says i need to mind my own business. but i don't think its fair to that guy at all.

[AnnieBrooke]

Does she know absolutely for sure the guy she is with is not the father, or is she just scared to test because he might not be?  If the latter, send her to our DNA/Paternity community and we might be able to count things out and figure out the chances.