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Getting over a break up

I had a break up approx 6 weeks ago. I thought this was the gal i was going to marry. we were together for 2 years, at times it was on/off but never truly off. This time it is off! I know she has found someone else and i have not. I can not seem to shake the feelings of missing her, at times it really hurts. I have been divorced for 12 years. My kids are 18, 17 and 15. Their mother has quite a few mental challenges. I have totally dedicated myself to the kids (they live 40 min from me) and have not taken care of me in a romantic, loving nurturing relationship until now. I have had a few other relationships but did not totally give of myself due to my feeling that I needed to take care of my kids. Well the kids are almost gone and I am feeling very alone. I am 45 years old and do not want to be alone anymore. I wake up daily thinking of this gal...............how do I move on quicker and try to meet my partner?
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209987 tn?1451935465
I'm sorry for your loss. I've "been there, done that" too.
I'm 44 and my sons are : 23, 19, 16, and 2.
I'm in the process of trying to leave my bf of 5 years ( he's an alcoholic) and now I found out yesterday that I'm pregnant...makes leaving that much harder, but I can't take the mental/verbal abuse much longer.
I rememeber the first man I fell in love with...took me two years to get over him.
He had cheated on me with my best friend.
My second true love, ( my ex husband) left me for a mail order bride.
And now this one...it *****.
If you think it's hard to find a woman, try being a single mom looking for a man...no one wants you if you have kids it seems.

I know you feel alone and hurt, and only time heals all wounds...sad but true.
It's only been 6 weeks you say...it will take a bit longer I'm afraid.
The man I am leaving is still hooked on his ex...they parted 6 years before I met him, we've been together 5 years, and he STILL talks about her and the fun they had...yet he will do nothing with me... it hurts very bad.
My mom and dad divorced when I was 12...my dad died just before Christmas...and he still loved my mom...he could never get over her.

Good luck to you my friend, and chin up.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
This is a tough situation to be in.You obviously still love her but realized to that she has moved on.You probably need to move on to.It will probably help take your mind of her.It seems to me that you are a great father and love your children dearly.You are an inspiration to all fathers out there.The focus and love you have for your children is to be admired.All the best for the future.
Helpful - 0
1620360 tn?1318904630
The quickest way to get over a break up is to make sure you have zero contact with that individual. That means, no looking at their photos, reading their letters/emails/texts that you've saved, no trips down memory lane of all the fond memories you shared. Do you best to avoid that person and not run into them or be at places you know they are going to be. Once you've done that, start spending time with friends, or make new ones. Get yourself out there and start dating casually. Keep things light and breezy until it either runs its course or develops into something more. Place an ad in the classifieds, check meetup.com for platonic friendships and people who share similar interests. Keep your mind busy and don't sit around listening to songs that remind you of her or watch movies or shows that spark memories of her. Erase every trace of her from your life until you are back on your feet. Stay busy, don't give your mind a playground to play.  
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