Weight

[Bandit221]

Hey, it's me again... heh :/ only this time I'm really upset with myself. I'm very self concious (always have been), but tonight really blew my lid. I was at the mall tonight with my boyfriend, trying on all of these crazy dresses. I tried this tight-ish one on, and I felt a little bad in it, but I showed him anyway. He said I looked nice in it, and that he liked it. But later on I was telling him how I felt when I was wearing it, and he said my stomach could have looked better in it. And that the dress "wasn't meant for me, it's made for anorexics or bean poles." well. I feel ridiculous now. I've always felt not so good about myself and my body, but tonight just made it worse.... I've been running lately to get in better shape, but that doesn't exactly help with the stomach. Does anyone know anything that could work the stomach out, or help tone it down..? It would also help if anyone had any exercises that works the inner thigh... Thanks y'all. I just needed to get that out and ask for some advice.

[brice1967]

You know what?  I struggle with my weight.  I'm a guy... and ever since I got out of high school 25-26 years ago, my weight fluctuates.  When I get my head on straight and commit to getting into the gym, I focus on working my core a lot more.  More importantly, eating right and at the right times are more important.

Any exercise is good... Diet, in my personal opinion is key.  If I stick to my diet and not exercise, I can still lose weight.  You kind of need to consider what kind of weight you are losing though.  Is it fat or is it muscle?  Muscle is smaller or takes up less room than fat.  Not that you want to become "buffed", but building muscle and doing weight bearing exercises do so much more than just a diet, or just running.

Can you speak with a personal trainer or a dietician?  Maybe even both?

This last month has been pretty stressful.... I gained 16 lbs in the last 45 days..... not good!  I am back on the program and will make progress, I just need to stick with it.

[akitagurl12]

everything that was in the comment above is wonderful advice, I needed to read it as well:).  I just want to let you know you are not alone in your struggles.  Just keep doing what you are doing, with the exercise and eatting balanced.  I have stopped reading any type of fashion magazine & I make it a point not to watch commericals on tv now and believe it or not, I can tell a difference in my mental health. I really think the media is screwing with us.  Also, with technology, most of those women in advertisments are freakin photoshopped! You are a beautiful woman & you are real!  :)

[swabes]

Hello there,
I'm sorry to hear about the predicament you're in.
I too am always very self concious about my weight and have went through anorexia and bulimia since I was 11 or 12. I am still recovering but not happy with my weight and reckon I never will be unless I went back to my lowest, unhealthiest weight.

You're boyfriend is right, clothes these days seem to be designed especially for extremely skinny people. There is no room in the fashion industries and media for the Mariyln Munroes of our generation anymore. Instead we are all expected to walk around with the average waistline of an 8 year old. I find it very disheartening and physically cannot even go out and try on new clothes because I know it will cause me to relapse. I haven't bought new clothes in well over a year now because I feel undeserving for not being a size 8 or whatever.

Honestly? Our weight will ALWAYS fluctuate throughout our lives, especially as we are women. We have things like pregnancy to endure, middle and old age. These things cause natural changes in our bodies that are quite inevitable really. The demands of society and sometimes mens preconcieved ideas about how a woman should look makes being happy in ourselves all the harder! I could rant about this all day, but don't worry I'll get back on track here!

Continue to run and eat healthily. Being healthy and happy is what matters most. When running or walking tense your stomach, walking or running is great excercise but tensing the stomach muscles adds a whole new element to it and will tone you up. Sometimes for tone to appear on our stomachs we have to lose weight first. I invested in underwear/support wear to define and sculp the figure, especially your stomach and sides, and it makes me feel a lot better about going on nights out ect. Some aren't very expensive and a great investment for a little confidence boost. Cutting bread/carb products out of your diet can also reduce bloating which suprisingly a lot of people mistake for fat. I'm not saying cut carbs or bread out altogether, we need them, but cutting down might help. The web is full of useful excercised designed specifically for problem areas.

I hoped I helped a little (I knew my obsessive and ritualistic dieting/excercise would be of use some day! Lol.) Be remember above all, health and happiness is what matters. Don't be so tough on yourself and try to learn to accept and love yourself, even a little!

Take care!