I feel for you. I'm not a teen anymore but when I was, I could have written your post. I indulged in drugs and alcohol. That is a terrible way to cope with depression, so I'm glad you didn't mention anything about that. I would talk to my guidance counselor or my parents and find a good therapist that specializes in child psychology.
It sound like you are mourning the death of your cousin and that grief is totally normal, but you are beyond just moderate depression. You need professional help. Please go to your high school counselor, parents, or any adult that you trust to help you find a good therapist.
You've got so much more life left. I'd like to hear how you're doing in the near future.
Good luck!
Yeah i haven't done any drugs, I really don't think they would even help at all or medicine. I didnt want to talk to my school counsler but I'm going to think about it.
Alright well thank you and I'll let you know too.
I can relate. I hated high school and I was probably more severely depressed than you. It seems to me that you are extremely close to not wanting to be around anyone and that is a red flag. I hated the thought of talking to my school guidance counselor. And when I did she was no help. My school had a social worker on staff and she really helped me. My point is that I do feel you should seek help and this comes with a warning that not all adults are helpful. If either one of your parents is close to you maybe try talking to them and say you want to see a therapist. I am now 25, married, and will have my masters in counseling in about 10 months. When I was your age I had no hope for the future but found a good therapist through community mental heallth that cared and helped.
I have plenty of stories that you might find helpful just to know that you aren't the only person who has felt that way because feeling alone is awful. Any help I can be let me know. There is a website for the american counseling association where you can research therapists where you live by speciality, look for child and adolescent. Things will get better even though it doesn't seem like it right now.
yup,can feel for you ...anyways also i tried drugs,alcohol...and the like but never really got addicted,I was depressed because of the separation of my parents and my father physically abuse me,I also had a close friend who committed suicide,anyways, just look at the bright side,eventhough life seems blunt,dark and full of despair,that you want to be alone,and just die...Eventually it'll go away,go to a psychologist,or psychiatrist which may help you.