Why won't my husband keep a job and what can I do?

[fearfactor]

I have seriously considered divorcing my husband because of his lack of ability to keep a job.  He either gets fired from or quits every job he gets, some very good ones.  I am working right now, but don't make very much and we have two children. He quit a very good job he had last week because the boss "disrespected" him - he just WALKED off the job, again a good-paying one, not easy to come by in our economy, because of this.  With the holidays coming, our kids needing things, etc.  I am very depressed about this and don't know quite what to do.  I have tried talking to him about it but every time he just blows up and says I only think of him as a paycheck, he wouldn't get mad at me for getting fired (yeah right), etc.  What can I do before this marriage ends?  Today is our 6 year anniversary and I don't want to scrap an otherwise OK marriage due to this issue.  And we CAN'T afford counseling because of no insurance - how can you afford medical insurance or out of pocket counseling when hubby won't work?  Thanks for all advice.

[dove3053]

I have read fearfactors other posts. I believe she said this man was  very cruel to their dog. I don't think it would be wise for her to stay with him. To tell anyone to stay in an abusive relationship is like signing their death warrant.

Dove

[dove3053]

I was trying to get your attention. I was in a relationship much like you are in now. I know the feeling of fear because you have no money and you are lonely. I don't think things will get any better with you and your husband and I think you know that too. I would like to see you move on with your life and not have to depend on anyone. I would like to see you happy. Tell me how you would picture your life without this guy?. For instance what kind of job you would be working at and where you would be living and what kind of new friends would you like to have.

Dove

[fearfactor]

Wow - that was really negative.  I am not trying to get anyone to feel sorry for me.  I sincerely doubt myself as to whether I should be mad over these things or not.  I have been going through this for 6 years now....sometimes I doubt myself and think it must be something I am doing to make him act this way.  Plus, I haven't posted on here in days.  I HAVE been taking action, namely, looking for a better job so I can move out with the kids and have called my mom to get some moral support (haven't talked to her in a while).  I have also been talking to trusted friends who are helping me realize it's not ME but HIM with the problem.  Not sure why you went off on me....

[dove3053]

What are you doing? Do you think posting to this forum will solve your problems. I certainly can't hurt. It seems to me like your just sitting around complaining and not willing to do what is necessary to insure your well being and that of your children. So you have choices. You can continue to complain and people will feel sorry for you or you can start to take some positive action. Why don't you get up and out and start changing your life. My guess is you will just keep posting and complaining about things. People get tired of hearing it. It would be nice to see you take some positive action.

Dove

[fearfactor]

I have considered divorce, believe me.  I am just too scared to do it.  It's almost like I am used to the abuse, even though it makes me hurt and sad.  Thanks for your advice, everyone.

[green eyed lady]

Oh I would get another job alright...too save money so I could throw his sorry a*s out!! Good luck to you and you children.