brothers

[helpx22]

Im the youngest out of my family and my oldest brother is diagnosed with Adhd. Im scared to me around him. Im scared he will hurt me or do something bad. He calls me names multible times every day. Fat, Ugly, Gay, Stupid, all these things. Like if im eating something he will take it throw it away and say i dont need that im to fat. I've recently started to throw up after meals Not every meal but some. Im scared to be home alone with him. Im scared that he will do something to me. Hes slapped me on my arm, punched me and all this stuff. and i think if i tell my parents that im scared and i dont know what to do around  him they wont do anything. I really want to see someone i really want to jjust talk to someone about it. I feel as though i cant . i dont trust anyone with it because if i do they will go to the fact that im bulimic and i have an issue which i dont because i dont throw up after every meal. i feel angry towards my brotther because hes put me through pain so much pain emotianiolly. I dont know who to go to . do i even need to see someone..anyone???

[helpx22]

It seems easy to tell someone but its hard. You dont know what to say. i dont know what to say? i need help i need to know HOW to tell my parents or an adult i dont know where to start when i tell them..do u?

[Jaybay]

Sweetie, you DO have an eating disorder. Although you don't vomit every day, your responses to anger and frustration are classic signs.  Does that mean you are "wrong"?  No way!  Does it mean you have a problem that needs help?  Yes.  :-)

If you would like to discuss this privately with me or suzi-q or anyone else here at MedHelp, you can change your user profile so you can accept private messages.  Just go to the top of the screen and click on My Medhelp to adjust your profile settings.  We all do want to help you and see you get back on your emotional game, but the first step is with you - and telling your parents or some other adult what is going on in your life.  

[helpx22]

I know i am in the wrong one and i relized that but i thank you for commenting back. And ur responds is amazing because its all true i am the good kid and he does get in trouble  im a female and im 13 years old. I dont think im builimic because i dont vomit every single day just when i get mad and when my brother calls me fat. i dont know who to go to because im not sure i have a real problem.

[suzi-q]

Can you please give me more information?  How old are you?  How old is your brother?  Are you a female or a male?  All this gives me info about you.  I am a teacher where I deal with ADHD students as well as bulimics.  I am not a doctor but I will try to help until you can get the necessary attention.  You are posting here because you have no where to turn to.  Well, I will try to help anyway I can.  

First of all, is your bulimia to help you control your life?  I will bet your parents focus all of their attention on your brother because he messes up so much. You are the "good" kid, am I right?  You are the one who they tell to "hush" while they deal with your brother.  They are not intentionally ignoring you.  You ARE important.  It is just that parents get so involved with the child who has problems that they forget those who seem to be "OK".  Give me more info, and I will help anyway I can.  I work with psychologists and guidance counselors and can hopefully give you useful information. Please post back right here so I can find you.

[Jaybay]

Oh sweetheart, you just happened to post in the wrong forum, but maybe we can help a bit.  Put the bulimia issues aside for the moment and focus on why you think you can't go to your parents about your fears.  What is the very worst thing you can think of that might happen?  If you ask them for help with your brother's abusive misbehavior, and they do nothing, is that the worst thing?  Yes?  No?  Do you think they will laugh at your concerns?  Blame you?  Maybe they will, maybe they won't.  The fact is, you MUST tell them how upsetting your brother's behavior is to you.  You have to make them understand you are literally afraid of him.  If they do nothing, you have lost nothing.  If they help you and understand, then you stand to gain everything.  Right?  If you get no help from them, you then have to find another adult to help.  Maybe another relative?  Even a school counselor as a last resort.

I think if you can get your parents to help you gain some control in your life, you'll find you won't need to resort to vomiting.  I have no doubt you already know how incredibly dangerous bulimia is, so I won't bore you with all the details.  Just know you are truly risking your life.  I know you're scared to tell anyone, much less your parents about this, but please start thinking about it.  Most people with eating disorders can't get well by themselves.  Give your parents the opportunity to be true parents by asking them for help with both these problems.  You don't have to blurt it out all at once, but at least make a start and tackle one thing at a time.

[kitten o]

HEY THERE,
I THINK YOU ARE IN THE WRONG FORUM.
THIS IS FOR DOGS I DO BELEAVE.
YOU SHOULD GO LOOK INTO THE FORUM LIST.
AND MAYBE THERE IS A SURPORT GROUP,
THERE WHO CAN HELP OR MAKE SOME SURGUSTIONS.
I WOULD TELL YOUR PARENTS AS SOON AS YOU CAN.
BUT THAT IS MY OPINION. GOOD LUCK