I just don't know what to do right now :(I've been doing really well trying to recover but people have now started to notice I have put on a lot of weight.I am now 19, at 9st and 5ft 5, the lowest weight people saw me at was 6st 7 (it all started when i was 12 so my weights fluctuated quite a lot)
All of my family dont even know that i am anorexic and they thought that i was naturally that weight. so now theyve seen me put on weight (this is the heaviest ive ever been) they keep mentioning that ive put on loads of weight and that i should start eating more healthier and watching my weight. my nanna was also really shocked when she found out my weight and compared it to her weight. she said that she weighed that much when she was 55 and that im only 19.
so its just made me start worrying again, i already felt really fat but was trying to ignore it and just recover but now other people think the same :( i can feel myself going into a relapse but i just cant stop it :( why should i try and recover when me and everyone else is a lot happier about the way i look when i weighed less than this.i even tried to make myself sick again which i only usually do when im at my worst.
i just feel like giving up right now and just going back to my old ways :( i cant even think of any excuses why i shouldnt go back to ana :(
i dont really know what the question is, i just think i need some advice and support
I know it is hard when you feel uncomfortable in your body and others are echoing your fears. Here’s an opportunity for you not to give your power away to others and your eating disorder. Listen to your voice: “I’ve been doing really well trying to recover”. Be around people who understand and support your recovery voice. On a deeper level, you know “going back to my old ways” is not an answer. Your old way was not working for you. That is why you have worked so hard to get where you are at today. Keep up the great work. Honor your healthy, inner voice. This is where recover begins and continues. We are opening forums on the bella vita site for those in recovery. You may want to check us out. Kindly, Patricia Pitts, PhD The Bella Vita Los Angeles, CA
You could try being honest to friends and family and tell them what you used to do to your body and how much heathier you are now.it's hard but you have nothing to be ashamed off,you are doing really great and should be proud.Don't let other people get to you.You have come this far.You are not fat at your weight,people just saw you as tiny before and didn't realise your natural heathy weight is what you are now.You might go up some more,you may go down a little,you may stay at this weight.Your get there.You allready are because you don't want to relapse,Don't beat yourself up,your gorgeous! good luck
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