Is anyone considering fostering or adopting a child as well?

[clomidkid]

Hi we've been ttc for 5 years and my fiance and I have been talking about fostering a child whilst we are trying to conceive as well. We made the decision to fill in the app pack but we haven't sent it off yet,the process takes around 6mths, just wondered what anyone's thoughts are on fostering? Has anyone fostered a child/ren?
We consider ourselves a family unit already with the two of us and we have been wanting to extend our family to include a child since we started trying to have a baby, I work in child care and I'm getting ready to start a new job but I keep thinking if we became foster parents short term we will benefit a child who needs a secure family and my maternal instincts will be put to gd use,lee will get some practice and we may relax more and manage to have a baby,we have a 2 bed cottage so we could foster one child and they can have their own room, there are different choices for fostering and one that appealed to us was where u care for the child short term whilst they are being adopted and before they move into their permanant home, that way I wouldnt worry about us getting too attached.
clomidkid x

[helen12]

I foster a 10 month child and she was my first. I loved this child as my own she just turned 2 and I had her for her first birthday, sounds, word called me mom and teething walking then she was taken from me given back to the mother who husband is in jail for child abuse and given a second chance now!!! She decides she wants her the court ruled in her favor. it is horrible and stress on you heart. But worth it...

[mysty2001]

I don;t have the money for private adoption and can;t really do public.  BUT I did foster.  I loved it in and of itself.  My problem was that I already had a child and it effected him
BUT I would do it in a heartbeat if I were childless.  You will find it is the most BEAUTIFUL and REWARDING experience!  You will foster love not a child
good luck

[aweeonetolove]

I would foster or adopt in a second (especially an older 'waiting child') unfortunately my DH is not interested at present time and I have to respect his decision.  I think being a Foster Parent and/or Adopting a child is a wonderful gift. I've done quite a bit of research but still, as I'm not fostering or adopting, I think it best to talk to people who have actually done this. I think there is another forum on adoption and you might want to ask people there. Some things to consider, many of these children have troubled backgrounds and/or developmental problems (that does not mean they are not the sweetest children in the world!) and as such, they need structured homes that can provide them with extra routine and care.  Furthermore, it can take a while for people to adopt a 'waiting child' because they are older, possibly troubled medically or emotionally and/or potentially part of a sibling unit.  That being said, it might not be as short term as you think and the child might need a foster home for several years.  If the child is adopted, at least here in Canada, they often help with the transition.  Meaning they will continue to allow visitations with you if they think that will benefit the child.  I think fostering a child can be a gift.  Many of these children need good, decent, structured homes to live in while awaiting adoption.  And a good strong family can make help make the transition from fostering to adoption healthy.  I don't mean this in a rude way but I would not recommend watching a movie to make your decision. A movie is, after all fiction and uses certain devices to manipulate your heartstrings.  It's great in the entertainment way but not entirely great in the factual way.  Talk to the ladies in the adoption forum and hopefully you can get some first hand accounts. Also talk to the agency, maybe they could put you in touch with other foster parents so you could learn more about fostering. Good luck in both fostering and ttc'ing!

[Jackson_Angel]

Hi there ~ fostering children not only pulls on your heart strings, but also on the child itself ~ by giving them a sence of stability and loving home life, you may be setting them up for a fall if their placed in a home below your daily standards ~ the regulations aren't always what they seem for the children, and although you would like to have a trial run of being a mom it might be better for all if you considered to extend that trial run into the real thing for the child, giving them not only a temporary sense of belonging and stability, but the life-long sense that someone actually wanted them whole-heartedly ~ it is devastating to children when they are placed in home after home ~ there was a movie out about it a few months back that was put out by Hallmark ~ PICTURES OF HOLLIS WOODS ~ it lets you feel how the children feel ~ real tear-jerker ~ but VERY good movie ~ actually had me thinking of adopting since there are so many children out there needing a loveing environment ~ would probably go that way instead of donor eggs....don't know ~ Good luck!! :-)