low risk exposure with wife but posible symptoms

[anxiouscan1]

Hi Doctor
I have read the answers you give, and I understand my question has mainly been answered in previous questions,  but I am extremely anxious as this includes my wife so the feeling is different.

Three weeks ago in a trip to brasil we hired a sex worker, the tree of us kissed and licked,, there was no penetration what so ever, and the only oral was that she the sex worker licked my penis on the sides, she did not put it in her mouth,,,,my concern was that my wife puted her fingers inside her vigina, and she put hers inside my wifes vagina.

I read the answers in your forum and was very comforted to hear this was mainly an almost no risk or no risk contact,, but the problem is exactly after 15 days my wife started having throat pain, then she had fever for a day and a half, with body ache and a bad cough for about 4 days,,,,she is now ok after 6 days and medicine,,this has made me very very anxious ,it is in my head all day.,,

I have also read in all your answers not to try to diagnose anything with this symptoms, but as is is my wife that felt sick and not me I would ask you if you can answer my specific case,,,, we took an hiv test after 17 days but I know this is too soon,,,,would you recomend a test at 6 or 8 weeks or not.

Thanks Doctor

[H. Hunter Handsfield, M.D.]

Your previous follow-up comment said "last question", and I'm holding you to it.  You can't expect a reply to every anxiety-driven "yes but" or "what if" thought comes to mind.  Re-read my replies above and follow up with your own provider if you have continued concerns.

[anxiouscan1]

Hello Doctor

I know you told me not to base anything in symptoms, and I was more calm, but today 8 days after her sore throat,fever and cough,my wife developed a rash on her upper chest mainly and a little on the inside of her arms and stomach,,, I am terrifed, I keep trying to think that no one has gotten infected for what we did but still with todays rash, i cant think of anything else please let me know what you think about this,,, this saturday will be 4 weeks,, is there any good in getting a test? or its just to early,, or can this simply be something else?

Thank you

[H. Hunter Handsfield, M.D.]

Don't worry about it.  The main difference between the various "generations" of tests is whether they are positive early, i.e. within 2-4 weeks.  By 6-8 weeks it makes little difference.  Anyway, Mexico is a medically sophisticated country, especially in major cities, and you can be prestty sure they use modern tests.  There are too many brands of HIV antibody tests, and I am not familiar with the one you cite.  You will need to ask the provider doing the test.

[anxiouscan1]

Last question Dr..  As I mentioned My wife had a hiv test 17 days after the event, I know it is to soon but at least I will be worried only for the event in brasil ( eventhough I shouldnt)
And even though I am trying to convince my self no tests are needed for what we did, I am sure I will finally go get the tests,,,  the thing is I live in Mexico and I dont know what generation the tests are here  the one we got last week says  AC. ANTI V.I.H 1&2    I dont know if this says anything to you,,,,, do you think with the almost no risk of  what we did  6 to 8 weeks will be enough here in Mex?

Thanks Again Doctor

[H. Hunter Handsfield, M.D.]

I have never had a patient who became infected with HIV by any route other than vaginal or anal intercourse, or blood sharing (as in injection drugs use with shared equipment).

[anxiouscan1]

Thank you for your answer,,, and this has been a one time event only, I have been married to her for 14 years,and she was my girlfriend for 4 years before that,we havnt had any other partners, at least that I know of! but after 18 years it was an adventure.
I ve had hiv tests lately,because we donated blood for my father  in law just a couple of months ago.
Based on that,,, the fingering, licking, kissing, are very low risk or almost no existant risk?
As I understand for what I have read , you have no nowledge of anyone getting the infection in that way?
Thanks again

[H. Hunter Handsfield, M.D.]

Thanks for reading other threads to get a feel for your risks before asking your question.  But there are two themes to our responses to situations like yours:  first, that the risks of acquiring HIV often are lower than people realize.  You got that one.  The second is that symptoms don't matter, because the symptoms that HIV can cause are identical to those of hundreds of other conditions, all more common than HIV.  Apparently you missed that one.

Your symptoms don't sound like HIV and are not a cause for any kind of anxiety.  Probably you caught sort of garden variety virus, like a common cold.  Probably it has nothing at all to do with your sexual adventure.  More likely you or your wife caught it the usual way, from a co-worker, friend, or someone who coughed near you.

Based on the details you provide, from a risk assessment or medical perspective, no HIV testing is necessary.  However, since you are nervous about it, probably you should be tested for peace of mind; most people in your circumstance need more than my reassurance of low risk.  And if this event is reflective of your and your wife's sexual lifestyle -- i.e., if you bring others into the relationship from time to time, or if either of you has other partners -- then you should have HIV and STD testing from time to time.  If so, then getting a test 6-8 weeks after the Brazil event makes sense.  But not because I suspect you actually have HIV; I do not.

I hope this helps.  Best wishes--  HHH, MD