Aa
Could anybody please help me?
I am so scared. I have no idea what is wrong with me. I am pregnant with my first child and I think we are both going to die. I have had so many things go wrong with my body. I have lost weight without trying. I have headaches, eye pain, joint pain, sore muscles, petechiae, stomach pain, chest pain, back pain, shortness of breath, fatigue, weakness, etc. I have taken three HIV tests and they have all been clear. I have had two antibody tests and a viral load test. I do not want my baby to die. I do not want to die. I feel so hopeless.
Ash,
Not having read your other posts, but reading the responses to this one, it seems you have some serious anxiety concerns.
If the testing hasn't revealed any medical basis for concern for either you or the baby, it would be a great idea to consult with a behavior and anxiety therapist who can get you some treatment immediately.
Anxiety can and does cause all if the symptoms you are describing. Fear and worry makes you hyper focused on each new ache, pain, or feeling, raising your anxiety even further, and increasing the perception of what sound like normal pregnancy body changes.
It is normal to have increased muscle, joint, ligament pain as your body changes, the baby grows, and your body prepares to carry the additional weight, and prepare for the birth.
Your headaches can be caused by two things, surges in hormones, and your anxiety level.
Please, talk to your ob/gynecologist, and consult with someone who specializes in treating anxiety, so you can enjoy the remaining parts of your pregnancy and look forward to this new life you will be responsible for.
His/her mother needs to be as healthy and well as she can be.
Not having read your other posts, but reading the responses to this one, it seems you have some serious anxiety concerns.
If the testing hasn't revealed any medical basis for concern for either you or the baby, it would be a great idea to consult with a behavior and anxiety therapist who can get you some treatment immediately.
Anxiety can and does cause all if the symptoms you are describing. Fear and worry makes you hyper focused on each new ache, pain, or feeling, raising your anxiety even further, and increasing the perception of what sound like normal pregnancy body changes.
It is normal to have increased muscle, joint, ligament pain as your body changes, the baby grows, and your body prepares to carry the additional weight, and prepare for the birth.
Your headaches can be caused by two things, surges in hormones, and your anxiety level.
Please, talk to your ob/gynecologist, and consult with someone who specializes in treating anxiety, so you can enjoy the remaining parts of your pregnancy and look forward to this new life you will be responsible for.
His/her mother needs to be as healthy and well as she can be.
14 Comments
I do hope I am healthy for my daughter. All I want is for me and my daughter to not be sick. I love my daughter so much. I guess I should try to go to a therapist. I am so tired of my body being in so much pain.
Ash,
Worrying is normal. I went and read your other posts, so I am a bit more familiar with your story and history.
Not to get too personal, but I read you experienced a trauma, just before your pregnancy. It is possible that trauma caused the increased anxiety, and concerns over both your health and the baby.
I read that you were very concerned about potential exposures after the trauma. That is a normal reaction to that type of trauma. Did you report the trauma? Tell anyone? Was it very close to the time of conception?
I suspect that the trauma incident heightened fears for your safety, and health that may have existed before the incident, but are magnified now.
I really hope you do seek assistance so that you can heal, and enjoy this pregnancy, and deliver a happy, healthy baby girl.
Bless you and this child honey.
Worrying is normal. I went and read your other posts, so I am a bit more familiar with your story and history.
Not to get too personal, but I read you experienced a trauma, just before your pregnancy. It is possible that trauma caused the increased anxiety, and concerns over both your health and the baby.
I read that you were very concerned about potential exposures after the trauma. That is a normal reaction to that type of trauma. Did you report the trauma? Tell anyone? Was it very close to the time of conception?
I suspect that the trauma incident heightened fears for your safety, and health that may have existed before the incident, but are magnified now.
I really hope you do seek assistance so that you can heal, and enjoy this pregnancy, and deliver a happy, healthy baby girl.
Bless you and this child honey.
Thank you for your kind words. My anxiety has been severe throughout my pregnancy. I appreciate you trying to help. I can't relax. I told a few people about what happened. I just want everything to be okay. I just want to wake up one day with my baby in my arms. I just want to not feel bad anymore.
I do not know where to go for help. I am so tired of crying.
Ashley,
I would suggest a couple of options...first would be a sex assault/rape crisis assistance center. There are many online, with 800 numbers, and they can offer resources specifically geared toward dealing with the trauma, fears, worry, and anxiety. In fact, they may be able to offer you help at no cost and be able to recommend specialist therapists/counseling who deal with trauma survivors .
What happened to you was wrong, and you were assaulted , perhaps more.
You may or may not decide to pursue criminal charges, but if you do, they can also help you in that.
Anxiety can be magnified by incidents such as what happened to you, and worsen. Your feeling of safety, security, and well being were ripped away, and caused health fears to increase on top of that.
Your ob can also refer you to help in your area and help reassure you regarding your health and the baby's.
Most counts have a crime victims assistance center. Those resources are available whether or not you choose to pursue matters criminally or not.
You can also call your county crisis hotline and get referrals there for help in your area.
Something you can do to try to ease your anxiety at home for now is to silently tell your mind to STOP when those feelings start. Tell yourself you are safe, your baby is safe, and these feelings will go away. Take a slow deep breath in through your nose..hold it, and force yourself to slowly exhale through your mouth...do this repeatedly, repeating in your mind, you are okay, the baby is okay, and keep the rhythmic breathing going until the anxiety lessens.
I would suggest a couple of options...first would be a sex assault/rape crisis assistance center. There are many online, with 800 numbers, and they can offer resources specifically geared toward dealing with the trauma, fears, worry, and anxiety. In fact, they may be able to offer you help at no cost and be able to recommend specialist therapists/counseling who deal with trauma survivors .
What happened to you was wrong, and you were assaulted , perhaps more.
You may or may not decide to pursue criminal charges, but if you do, they can also help you in that.
Anxiety can be magnified by incidents such as what happened to you, and worsen. Your feeling of safety, security, and well being were ripped away, and caused health fears to increase on top of that.
Your ob can also refer you to help in your area and help reassure you regarding your health and the baby's.
Most counts have a crime victims assistance center. Those resources are available whether or not you choose to pursue matters criminally or not.
You can also call your county crisis hotline and get referrals there for help in your area.
Something you can do to try to ease your anxiety at home for now is to silently tell your mind to STOP when those feelings start. Tell yourself you are safe, your baby is safe, and these feelings will go away. Take a slow deep breath in through your nose..hold it, and force yourself to slowly exhale through your mouth...do this repeatedly, repeating in your mind, you are okay, the baby is okay, and keep the rhythmic breathing going until the anxiety lessens.
The stress of everything is just too much. I just keep praying to God to make everything better. I appreciate that you are doing your best to help me. I just want everything to be okay.
Ash1818,
Prayers are good, but you also have to DO something to help yourself as well.
Sitting there worrying is ONLY going to make the stress levels higher, and increase the concerns you already have.
No one can do this for you, or for your baby.
Take a deep breath and start making the calls to the resources I suggested.
Wishing it away isn't helping, so you NEED to do something.
If you choose to allow the anxiety to paralyze you into INACTION, how are you going to care for a baby?
A baby needs a parent who puts their needs above their own, above their fears, and does what needs to be done to give the baby the best chances in life. So pick up the phone and get started to get yourself to a place where you can be a mother who puts her child well being first.
Prayers are good, but you also have to DO something to help yourself as well.
Sitting there worrying is ONLY going to make the stress levels higher, and increase the concerns you already have.
No one can do this for you, or for your baby.
Take a deep breath and start making the calls to the resources I suggested.
Wishing it away isn't helping, so you NEED to do something.
If you choose to allow the anxiety to paralyze you into INACTION, how are you going to care for a baby?
A baby needs a parent who puts their needs above their own, above their fears, and does what needs to be done to give the baby the best chances in life. So pick up the phone and get started to get yourself to a place where you can be a mother who puts her child well being first.
Will it be completely anonymous if I call? I really just need someone to talk to right now. Everything is just so bad.
Yes. You don't have to give your info if you don't want to .
We have several mental health resources here: https://www.medhelp.org/general-health/articles/MedHelp-Crisis-Resources/1037, including one option that is for texting. The priority of these organizations is to get you help, not to figure out who you are. Please, give it a try.
Thank You Kirstie_MHModerator
Thank you, Kristie and backhurtz.
Good luck Ash...I am pulling for you and for your baby. You BOTH deserve to be well and healthy and healed.
Thank you so much. :)
Sweetie, I think you need to talk to your doctor about your high anxiety level. Hormones can make that worse and the fear is it will get even worse once you deliver the baby. You filled with irrational fear at this point. Please talk to your doctor. Your ob/gyn is supposed to be looking or this type of anxiety to help you. Let us know how we can help too.
1 Comments
I know I need to talk to someone. I am just so tired of being in pain every day. I do not want to be scared anymore. All I want is for me and my daughter to be okay.
Your first thread in the HIV forum was answered that you had zero risk, yet you continued to worry and kept posting new threads there, instead of accepting the advice.
Consider therapy to try to deal with all the anxiety in your life, and print off all the posts you have made in the other forums so the therapist can get a good idea of the situation. No one here can provide one on one therapy.
Consider therapy to try to deal with all the anxiety in your life, and print off all the posts you have made in the other forums so the therapist can get a good idea of the situation. No one here can provide one on one therapy.
2 Comments
I guess I could try to go back to therapy. I do not want to be scared anymore.
I just saw that I put this in the wrong place. I thought I had posted in the section of symptoms that are undiagnosed. I am really sorry.
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