Aa
For everyone.
I wrote this for farfromperfect, but after finishing it, I realized that maybe one or two of you might find it useful.
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"Stop giving a disease so much power over you. Take back your power.
Here's a tip that a very, very old nurse gave me back when I was a nurses aide at 18 in a nursing home. I was working in the worst area of the home, where they keep the most horrible cases, people who eat their feces, smear them, are pretty much insane all the time. We had to feed them, dress them, and sit them in the day room every day. After the 2nd day, I went to this nurse, crying that I hated it and couldn't do it. She gave me this advice that has gotten me through a lot of tough times.
If you are in a situation and don't like it, ACT as if you do like it. Try it just for a week. She told me to go in every day with a smile on my face, hug the residents of the unit, giggle with them, and ACT as though it was the best job in the world. To act until I could get an academy award. I thought she was insane, but as I needed the job to get through nursing school, I tried it.
FFP, it was very hard. But I went around acting as though I loved these people that repulsed and frightened me. I bathed them and cared for them, and fed them as though they were my very own parents. You know what? After a bit, it became the truth. I learned their names, their histories, learned that they never had family coming to see them, nothing. We arranged birthday parties, brought our dogs and cats in to visit, and just basically started treating them with honor and respect, and joy.
What I'm asking you to do is what that nurse asked me to try. ACT as though you are not afraid of HIV. Do not come back here, unless it is to offer kind and supporting words to the ones who haven't come as far as you. ACT each day confidently, as if you are not fearing "the dreadful disease". Part of acting this way is to stop examining your body. Pretend you are going for an academy award for NOT being afraid of this disease. ACT as though you are confident, strong, and healthy.
For you see, my friend...when you ACT AS IF, you eventually BECOME. I acted as if I loved those old people, and eventually I did! Please, each day, act as if you are not afraid.
I feel a special connection to you. You seem salvagable. I hate that you are giving up your power to a disease. To a virus. THAT YOU DON'T EVEN HAVE. "
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"Stop giving a disease so much power over you. Take back your power.
Here's a tip that a very, very old nurse gave me back when I was a nurses aide at 18 in a nursing home. I was working in the worst area of the home, where they keep the most horrible cases, people who eat their feces, smear them, are pretty much insane all the time. We had to feed them, dress them, and sit them in the day room every day. After the 2nd day, I went to this nurse, crying that I hated it and couldn't do it. She gave me this advice that has gotten me through a lot of tough times.
If you are in a situation and don't like it, ACT as if you do like it. Try it just for a week. She told me to go in every day with a smile on my face, hug the residents of the unit, giggle with them, and ACT as though it was the best job in the world. To act until I could get an academy award. I thought she was insane, but as I needed the job to get through nursing school, I tried it.
FFP, it was very hard. But I went around acting as though I loved these people that repulsed and frightened me. I bathed them and cared for them, and fed them as though they were my very own parents. You know what? After a bit, it became the truth. I learned their names, their histories, learned that they never had family coming to see them, nothing. We arranged birthday parties, brought our dogs and cats in to visit, and just basically started treating them with honor and respect, and joy.
What I'm asking you to do is what that nurse asked me to try. ACT as though you are not afraid of HIV. Do not come back here, unless it is to offer kind and supporting words to the ones who haven't come as far as you. ACT each day confidently, as if you are not fearing "the dreadful disease". Part of acting this way is to stop examining your body. Pretend you are going for an academy award for NOT being afraid of this disease. ACT as though you are confident, strong, and healthy.
For you see, my friend...when you ACT AS IF, you eventually BECOME. I acted as if I loved those old people, and eventually I did! Please, each day, act as if you are not afraid.
I feel a special connection to you. You seem salvagable. I hate that you are giving up your power to a disease. To a virus. THAT YOU DON'T EVEN HAVE. "
I know, I feel sick over how I am acting but I have problems with anxiety and panic attacks that make me act like this. I am getting help if I test negative. My mom is forcing me into counseling, maybe meds.
I wish I could be like you! You have a good sense of humor about things and I bet if you had a risk for HIV you would be calm about it. I could never be like that :(
I wish I could be like you! You have a good sense of humor about things and I bet if you had a risk for HIV you would be calm about it. I could never be like that :(
No, you need it now.
Your doctor does not understand how HIV is transmitted. You do not get it by having a bit of vaginal fluid touch the tip of your penis. And it is totally unecessary to wash off a condom before taking it off. If you take it off correctly, it will not touch the tip of your penis anyway.
Your doctor does not understand how HIV is transmitted. You do not get it by having a bit of vaginal fluid touch the tip of your penis. And it is totally unecessary to wash off a condom before taking it off. If you take it off correctly, it will not touch the tip of your penis anyway.
COMMUNITY LEADER
BD,
Your doc seems to be real F'ed up in the head, it doesn't happen that way, you'd ask "why ?"
Let me tell you,
1. The virus can't survive in the atmosphere, it dies as soon as it's exposed to the air.
2. The concentration of HIV in females are high in the cervico-vaginal fluid and not the vaginal fluid, pre-*** and vaginal fluid does carry the virus but a little amount of vaginal fluid / pre-*** might never be able to transmit the virus, one needs to be exposed to a substantial amount of vaginal fluid for any risk
3. In the US, the FTM transmission is relatively low and one episode of unprotected vaginal sex is considered to be a very low risk.
4. Above all, you were protected and the pores of the condom don't let the HIV pass through it, condoms do protect.
5. Now, I want you to think rationally, if your doc's right, the first thing that you should do now is that you should call up your doc and tell him " Four f.ucks to you", consult with an HIV specialist if you need to know any thing about HIV, don't you see what has happened to FFP, one misinterpreted info has screwed his case up, he's tested out till 5 months, no one needs to test out till 5 months, where's the problem ? Some, knowledge deficient professional suggested him to test out till 6 months, some times even professionals give out wrong info cuz either they are behind time or they just simply fake it since they just don't know about it.
Your doc seems to be real F'ed up in the head, it doesn't happen that way, you'd ask "why ?"
Let me tell you,
1. The virus can't survive in the atmosphere, it dies as soon as it's exposed to the air.
2. The concentration of HIV in females are high in the cervico-vaginal fluid and not the vaginal fluid, pre-*** and vaginal fluid does carry the virus but a little amount of vaginal fluid / pre-*** might never be able to transmit the virus, one needs to be exposed to a substantial amount of vaginal fluid for any risk
3. In the US, the FTM transmission is relatively low and one episode of unprotected vaginal sex is considered to be a very low risk.
4. Above all, you were protected and the pores of the condom don't let the HIV pass through it, condoms do protect.
5. Now, I want you to think rationally, if your doc's right, the first thing that you should do now is that you should call up your doc and tell him " Four f.ucks to you", consult with an HIV specialist if you need to know any thing about HIV, don't you see what has happened to FFP, one misinterpreted info has screwed his case up, he's tested out till 5 months, no one needs to test out till 5 months, where's the problem ? Some, knowledge deficient professional suggested him to test out till 6 months, some times even professionals give out wrong info cuz either they are behind time or they just simply fake it since they just don't know about it.
I just reached down and attempted to yank it off, it got stuck against my skin, so thin I proceeded to roll it off. Was that the wrong way? Maybe I've been taking them off wrong. The other girls I had no reason to be concerned. They were nice clean girls, this 1 time. I mean looking at this girl, I really wouldn't have guessed that she's as hoish as she is. Hoish may not be a word, but you get where I'm comming from.
Even my Doc told me it would be possible to touch contaminated vaginal fluid and unknowingly get it in the tip of the penis. He told me to wash the condom off before I take it off. Even though he said its a slim chance that I could get it that way, it's still a chance. I've been so nieve in my life. I just found out about herpes by comming to this site. If I knew I could get an STD just by genitals touching, I probably would have just stayed a virgin, or just date a person for a year before we did anything. I feel so stupid. When they told me I had herpes 1, I thought that person gave it to me, not realizing I had it since I was a kid. If by the grace of God I'm neg, I'm going to need some serious counseling after this whole ordeal.
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