Concerned and confused

[whiteswan]

Hello Doctors:
In Nov, I started dating my bf, we both got tested and STD panel came out Negative. We had performed foreplay during the time we were dating. We ended our relationship and during that time I went on a date with a long time friend. Jan. 1 we deep kissed and I tasted a little bit of blood, I had no contact with his penis(he was fully clothed), he fingered me and performed oral sex on me briefly as he fingered me. I don't know if he had any cuts. I kept asking him if he was tested recently and he said yes and that he was clean. (he tends to sleep around).
My bf and I ended up getting back together a week later. I'm worried because I haven't been feeling too great, three weeks ago I had a bad flu and strep throat with some white coating in the back of my tongue. We don't sleep around and haven't had an intercourse encounter with anyone since we were tested. 2 weeks ago we ended up making love with/without a condom (during my period).
I'm worried because I just recently got a cold sore (which I got in childhood), and my throat has been bothering me as well as feeling exhausted. Is there any chance of transmission of HIV or anything with my friend during Jan 1? I keep reading that there isn't but each story is unique so I wanted to make sure. Should I be paranoid about getting retested? I'm concerned because I would never want to hurt my bf in any way. Are my symptoms perhaps a re-occurance of strep or perhaps sinusitis (which i've had before)? Could it be stress related or the fact I had a heavy period? Is there a higher risk of any type of transmission while on your period? I'm so confused.
Also, my bf knows I've dealt with cold sores since I was a little girl, and a few days ago I never felt any tingling or saw anything coming and I gave him a blow job. I've read about shedding periods, the cold sore popped out on my lip 18hrs later. Is there a risk of him catching it on his penis? I'm very stressed out.

Thank you for your help!

[Edward W Hook, MD]

Sounds like you are doing the right thing.  Take care.  EWH

[whiteswan]

Thank you for your response Doctor. I know that his sister has HSV-1 since she was little, he said that they've shared drinks and he's never had an outbreak. He definitely knows of my cold sores, I've had them since I was little during Chernobyl accident, I've been 100% honest with him. I would have told him about what happened with my friend previously when we were broken up, but when I started to he told me he didn't want to know anything about it.
He agreed to get tested for HSV-1 and HSV-2 just in case, so we are doing that this weekend.

[Edward W Hook, MD]

Welcome to our Forum.  Let's eal with your questions in order.  Your risk for HIV from the encounter with your friend is zero.  HIV is not spread by masturbation or by oral sex.  There is no reason for concern.  Of course there are many other possible reasons for your feeling run down- the lingering effects of your cold, some other viral process (not necessarily caught from your friend) but HIV is not one of them.

Now, regarding your cold sores.  At the present time over 25% of genital herpes is cause by HSV-1 and most of that is the result of oral sex.  There can be asymptomatic shedding of HSV-1 but fortunately transmission through this mechanism doesn't happen too often.  In addition, I woulo point out that there is a high chance that your BF already has HSV-1 - over 60%of the population does.  To this end I have several suggestions.  first, be sure he knows of your cold sores and that there is a risk of transmission.  Honesty is ALWAYS the best policy.  Second, if he does not already know that he has cold sores, he might benefit from a type specific blood test for HSV.  The odds are better than 50/50 that he already has it an if he does, there is no risk of you infecting him.

I hope these comments are helpful.  EWH