The only risks for HIV in adults are:
1) Having unprotected (no condom) penetrative anal or vaginal sex, OR
2) Sharing IV drug equipment with other IV drug users.
No other event that you can think of, including the event you mentioned, puts you at risk for HIV. No penetration = no risk.
I'm in the same situation as well. It is said as no risk, as long as there is no unprotected penetrative vaginal and anal sex. They said frottage is zero risk