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One night stand(s)-Horrible Anxiety
Hello Dr.-
Thank you for taking the time to answer my question in advance. I was so relieved to find this site. I will try to be brief in describing my situation. From the year's 2006-2010 I was in a long-term relationship with a man (I am a woman). Our relationship was on again, off again and I engaged in very stupid short-term sexual relationships/one night stands when we were off-again. I was tested throughout our relationship and was always negative. In 2009 while we were broken up I engaged in three one night stands and intermittently used condoms. I understand how risky this behavior is ,but at the time I was young, careless and abusive to myself. None of these people were drug users as far as I know, and I asked about STD status in all circumstances. All said they were negative. For whatever reason I did not feel the need to get tested after this and I eventually ended my long-term relationship and moved to the other side of the country and began a long-term, monogomous relationship, of which I am in now. A few months into that relationship I was tested for STDs during an emergency room visit. I was under the impression that they tested for HIV ,but during a PAP Smear last month, I learned they only tested for Chlymydia, Ghonnoreha. I tested negative for the STDs they tested for and also during my routine PAP everything came back a-ok. I have never had any symptoms and am in very good health. For some reason for the past month I have been obsessing about my past and feeling a tremendous amount of guilt for my past behavior. I have been honest with my partner about my fears, and anxieties and he thinks I am being ridiculous. My question is, based on the description of my past what are the chances I am HIV+? Also, I would like to note, I have a history of anxiety and possibly some obsessive tendencies. Thank you so much. I hope this will ease my mind.
Thank you for taking the time to answer my question in advance. I was so relieved to find this site. I will try to be brief in describing my situation. From the year's 2006-2010 I was in a long-term relationship with a man (I am a woman). Our relationship was on again, off again and I engaged in very stupid short-term sexual relationships/one night stands when we were off-again. I was tested throughout our relationship and was always negative. In 2009 while we were broken up I engaged in three one night stands and intermittently used condoms. I understand how risky this behavior is ,but at the time I was young, careless and abusive to myself. None of these people were drug users as far as I know, and I asked about STD status in all circumstances. All said they were negative. For whatever reason I did not feel the need to get tested after this and I eventually ended my long-term relationship and moved to the other side of the country and began a long-term, monogomous relationship, of which I am in now. A few months into that relationship I was tested for STDs during an emergency room visit. I was under the impression that they tested for HIV ,but during a PAP Smear last month, I learned they only tested for Chlymydia, Ghonnoreha. I tested negative for the STDs they tested for and also during my routine PAP everything came back a-ok. I have never had any symptoms and am in very good health. For some reason for the past month I have been obsessing about my past and feeling a tremendous amount of guilt for my past behavior. I have been honest with my partner about my fears, and anxieties and he thinks I am being ridiculous. My question is, based on the description of my past what are the chances I am HIV+? Also, I would like to note, I have a history of anxiety and possibly some obsessive tendencies. Thank you so much. I hope this will ease my mind.
MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL
Welcome to the forum. Thanks for your question.
But to be honest, there is no point to asking. You need to be HIV tested. As you will see below, your sexual lifestyle has not been especially risky, and I fully expect your test will be negative. But nobody can be 100% certain without testing. And all sexually active people, outside mutually monogamous relstionships, should be tested for HIV from time to time, like once every couple of years.
You describe a low risk sexual lifestyle with respect to HIV. In the US and other industrialized countries, high risk involves anonymous sex between men and sex in trade for money or drugs. Simply having several partners, even without condoms, is not high risk.
So I would put the odds you have HIV as under 1 chance in a thousand. Go ahead and get tested, and feel free to return with a comment to let me know the result. Until then, you shouldn't be at all worried about the outcome.
Best regards-- HHH, MD
But to be honest, there is no point to asking. You need to be HIV tested. As you will see below, your sexual lifestyle has not been especially risky, and I fully expect your test will be negative. But nobody can be 100% certain without testing. And all sexually active people, outside mutually monogamous relstionships, should be tested for HIV from time to time, like once every couple of years.
You describe a low risk sexual lifestyle with respect to HIV. In the US and other industrialized countries, high risk involves anonymous sex between men and sex in trade for money or drugs. Simply having several partners, even without condoms, is not high risk.
So I would put the odds you have HIV as under 1 chance in a thousand. Go ahead and get tested, and feel free to return with a comment to let me know the result. Until then, you shouldn't be at all worried about the outcome.
Best regards-- HHH, MD
MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL
Yes. Suck it up and just do it. That's by far the best way (and probably ONLY way) to get beyond your fear and anxiety.
I have no patience with not getting tested for fear of a positive result, whether for HIV, mammography, or prostate exams in men. It isn't the test that gives someone the disease, and if you have HIV, you have to know it. Most important, research and clinical experience show again and again that when someone has delayed medical testing out of fear, anxiety drops when the test has been done. Even a positive result is less stressful than the worry about it ahead of time.
So just bite the bullet and get tested. For the reasons stated above, it is exceedingly unlikely the result will be positive. In the 8 years of this forum, with thousands of questions, not one person has actually turned out to have caught HIV after exposures they were concerned about. You're not going to be the first.
Feel free to let me know the result after you have been tested. Until then I won't have any further comments or advice.
I have no patience with not getting tested for fear of a positive result, whether for HIV, mammography, or prostate exams in men. It isn't the test that gives someone the disease, and if you have HIV, you have to know it. Most important, research and clinical experience show again and again that when someone has delayed medical testing out of fear, anxiety drops when the test has been done. Even a positive result is less stressful than the worry about it ahead of time.
So just bite the bullet and get tested. For the reasons stated above, it is exceedingly unlikely the result will be positive. In the 8 years of this forum, with thousands of questions, not one person has actually turned out to have caught HIV after exposures they were concerned about. You're not going to be the first.
Feel free to let me know the result after you have been tested. Until then I won't have any further comments or advice.
Thank you Dr. Handsfield-
I am having a major issue with anxiety. When I read your response I felt like I was going to throw up. The thought of even having HIV makes me feel like I am going to have a panic attack. I have such a fear of taking this test. Any suggestions in getting over this fear?
I am having a major issue with anxiety. When I read your response I felt like I was going to throw up. The thought of even having HIV makes me feel like I am going to have a panic attack. I have such a fear of taking this test. Any suggestions in getting over this fear?
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