Aa
What is going on??!?! Are these signs or am I about to have a nervous break down...
At first I thought they were all just coincidences...I have never been a superstitus/spirtual person, but I just don't see how these all are coincidences. I am really really scared right now...so scared. These signs keep poping up everywhere I go! I thought I was in the clear.
Just things up really fast, my possible exposure was a while ago. Had a road rash and a rumoured hiv + person touched it ( i think). well at the 8 weeks and something days mark I tested negative (also at the 4 wk mark). Then about a month ago, I smashed my finger on a package at the USPS and may have touched a pen or something while I was bleeding under my fingernail. now about 2 wks ago I used a public toliet while having a case of diariah and possible what ever that was in the toliet may of hit my anal area that was already sensitive and maybe open (wound wise) because it was very swore. The 8 wk test probably covered about 20 days after the fingernail incident at the PO so I guess that is encouraging. The whole public diariha thing now has me worried a bit. My most risky exposure was possible blood hiting my road rash, but wouldn't the 8 wk and somehting days nullify that exposure? Another thing that has been going on is that I think my lymphnodes may be acting up. about 2 wks ago, but neck was killing me and now has been swore every now and then. Can lymphnodes get to the point that can become really painful, or do they feel just a little tender when infection is present?
Now we get the what is really freaking me out...the signs. After that 8 week test, I was really almost over it, but now my swore neck and the signs have really gotten to me! I am so afriad that just typing these things freaks me out...
- I keep seeing these hiv mtv commericlas all the time, everyday.
- My friend just found an easy e cd (a rapper who died from aids)
- Some friends keep joking about aids in general.
- another friend...invited me to the aids walk coming up!!!!! I almost lost it there.
- And this is when my heart began go nuts. I get home and my sister is watching a movie all about hiv and aids..A girl that is posistive. I am watching the movie as I type and I am freaking out.
How can these all be concidences?!?!? There has to be a reason, its just too much.
I am so afraid...my risk was so close to a low risk and I had an 8 wk negative test! Could I be the one who clears the 6-8 wk mark, but tests pos at the 3 month mark????
I just can't shake it off....how am I ever going to stop it. I guess it will only stop if I test pos, but how could that be possible???? I tested negative and had such a low risk!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I can't take much more. I hate being this way. hopefully at the final 3 month mark I can get passed it all. Sorry for my madness and if I freaked any of you out, but I have no where else to go.
Thank you.
Just things up really fast, my possible exposure was a while ago. Had a road rash and a rumoured hiv + person touched it ( i think). well at the 8 weeks and something days mark I tested negative (also at the 4 wk mark). Then about a month ago, I smashed my finger on a package at the USPS and may have touched a pen or something while I was bleeding under my fingernail. now about 2 wks ago I used a public toliet while having a case of diariah and possible what ever that was in the toliet may of hit my anal area that was already sensitive and maybe open (wound wise) because it was very swore. The 8 wk test probably covered about 20 days after the fingernail incident at the PO so I guess that is encouraging. The whole public diariha thing now has me worried a bit. My most risky exposure was possible blood hiting my road rash, but wouldn't the 8 wk and somehting days nullify that exposure? Another thing that has been going on is that I think my lymphnodes may be acting up. about 2 wks ago, but neck was killing me and now has been swore every now and then. Can lymphnodes get to the point that can become really painful, or do they feel just a little tender when infection is present?
Now we get the what is really freaking me out...the signs. After that 8 week test, I was really almost over it, but now my swore neck and the signs have really gotten to me! I am so afriad that just typing these things freaks me out...
- I keep seeing these hiv mtv commericlas all the time, everyday.
- My friend just found an easy e cd (a rapper who died from aids)
- Some friends keep joking about aids in general.
- another friend...invited me to the aids walk coming up!!!!! I almost lost it there.
- And this is when my heart began go nuts. I get home and my sister is watching a movie all about hiv and aids..A girl that is posistive. I am watching the movie as I type and I am freaking out.
How can these all be concidences?!?!? There has to be a reason, its just too much.
I am so afraid...my risk was so close to a low risk and I had an 8 wk negative test! Could I be the one who clears the 6-8 wk mark, but tests pos at the 3 month mark????
I just can't shake it off....how am I ever going to stop it. I guess it will only stop if I test pos, but how could that be possible???? I tested negative and had such a low risk!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I can't take much more. I hate being this way. hopefully at the final 3 month mark I can get passed it all. Sorry for my madness and if I freaked any of you out, but I have no where else to go.
Thank you.
Your not getting hiv like that. Magic Johnson could have had a **** in the toilet and you would have no worries.
I had to man. It was diariah, I couldn't hold it.
Please, anyone else, if you have something to say to me, then please say it. Thank you.
Please, anyone else, if you have something to say to me, then please say it. Thank you.
Why use a public toilet. I'd rather dump on myself than go and sit on a public toilet.
now about 2 wks ago I used a public toliet while having a case of diariah and possible what ever that was in the toliet may of hit my anal area that was already sensitive and maybe open (wound wise) because it was very swore.
i worry about public tolets to.i wonder did anyone ever get hiv this way?
i worry about public tolets to.i wonder did anyone ever get hiv this way?
I know exactly how you feel...I need counceling, desperately.But I cannot afford it...I think i'm going crazy...I used to take medicine for my anxiety and depression...I stopped taking them and then this happened. I wouldn't even concider myself as living a normal life right now.
Even just writing my thoughts help some. I don't think there was any kind of tramatic event that is triggering this...I just think all of this is just overwhelming me. I really wish I could afford consoling, but I can't.
I read your entire post- and I have to ask you if you had a traumatic event happen to you that has caused all of this. I know your initial "exposure" freaked you out, but is there anything else that is triggering this sort of anxiety?
I too, keep seeing these so called signs. I saw the commerical for that girl positive movie, some guy at a club told me he was scared of aids, a friend of mine told me her boyfriend was cheating her and was now worried that she had aids all happened in a matter of two weeks. I think we have to take a step back and really look at the situation and realize that we are okay. Talking to someone helps, a close friend or family member. Sounding out your thoughts really helps to put things into perspective.
Hope this helps.
I too, keep seeing these so called signs. I saw the commerical for that girl positive movie, some guy at a club told me he was scared of aids, a friend of mine told me her boyfriend was cheating her and was now worried that she had aids all happened in a matter of two weeks. I think we have to take a step back and really look at the situation and realize that we are okay. Talking to someone helps, a close friend or family member. Sounding out your thoughts really helps to put things into perspective.
Hope this helps.
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