Down

[gauf]

Feeling kind of down. I am a 2x relapser with cirrhosis. Now, I find out I have steatosis. Losing weight is damn hard. When I think of what is coming (again), and the fact that I can't get a hold of alinia, or get my doc to ok double dosing, I wonder if it's worth it. I mean i don't feel my odds are very good for SVR. I have lately been thinking that maybe it's just the way it is, why NOT me?  Thinking about dying and trying to come to terms with it. Not angry anymore....just starting to accept that maybe I am just supposed to go. Thinking about how long I can last. Spirituality too.  I know some of you must have felt this way... I am not a quiter, but, well some of us just can't win no matter what it seems. Not even looking for advice really, I just can't say what i am feeling to my family as they will not understand.

[katerika]

Came across this quote I'd like to share


Hope has two beautiful daughters - their names are anger and courage; anger at the way things are, and courage to see that they do not remain the way they are.

St. Augustine


Keep up the fight!
Teri

[FlGuy]

Descartes:
I doubt, therefore I think, therefore I am
Foresee in the role of Descartes:
I doubt, therefore I think, therefore I am and am the only one who thinks

[Forseegood]

you pulled my covers! I'm a solipsist! (Solipsism (Latin: solus, alone + ipse, self) is the philosophical idea that "My mind is the only thing that I know exists". Solipsism is an epistemological or metaphysical position that knowledge of anything outside the mind is unjustified. The external world and other minds cannot be known and might not exist. In the history of philosophy, solipsism has served as a skeptical hypothesis.) whatever! Maybe alien beings are running each one of our realities, from faraway stars.....if that's the case, pay off my Visa you idiots!!! :)

The 18 year old is fine, she just vacuumed, could knock me over with a feather! She wants to take the whole day off of school tomorrow, to primp up so she can take her senior yearbook pictures tomorrow afternoon. I told her time would be better spent in just studying - to be able to graduate. Lord help me, I've turned into my mother. YIKES!!!!!! Were we worse when we were teenagers? or better? God knows. At least we had the Beatles. Good on you Fldude.

[FlGuy]

I'll tell you the trick, but don't share it with anyone.  I am all these people.  In reality, it's only you and me in this forum.  At least I have nice company.  How's the kid.  Did I read she turned 18?

[Forseegood]

it always amazes me the facts about posters you have at your fingertips? and you just finished your second treatment? gee....I don't have that kind of memory retention on myself. Hope youre well.

[FlGuy]

I wouldn't be so quick to call yourself a relapser.  If I recall correctly, your first tx ended very early and your second had reduced meds. Correct?  There are many docs who believe that a patient who can get to undetected is a patient that can get to svr.  The trick, I think, is finding a doc and a treatment regimen that can get you to the end (whatever number that is) my managing and pre-managing side effects.  Having tried twice the recipe for the successful tx needs to be different and aggressive with a doc who is willing to push the envelope a little while making sure you can finish what you start.  All is not lost and there's no need to throw in the towel.