a few ?'s about herpes

[shocker13]

Hello, I just got diagnosed with genital herpes a little over a week ago.  I was in so much pain that i actually went into the e.r.  worst experience of my life.  I never ever thought i would have herpes, im 24 f, and i have only been with one partner, and i have been with him for almost 5 years.  He never knew that he had it, but must have gotten it from a previous partner, because he swears that he has never and would never cheat on me. Not everyone has symptoms i believe.  at least i hope!  Anyways I was just wondering who I am to follow up with, a family physician or a gyn that can prescirbe some meds.  I was on the acyclovir for 10 days but it is gone now.  Im not sure if you take meds daily for herpes or do you just have some on hand in case of an outbreak?  I am very new to all this stuff, and any information would be very much appreciated..
Merry Christmas to you all!

[shocker13]

Oh grace you are just to funny... I bet you play a good doctor, because you really do well on here.  You have a been a lot of help to me, and it looks like many others as well.  And you are right there are somethings you cant ask your doctor.  Especialyl for someone like myself who just got diagnosed with herpes, I never knew much about it, and i dont want to have to keep calling and asking questions.  I never knew that they had things like this room before and it is so much help!
AND CONGRATS. on the 2008 poster thats so great!
So what is it that you do in the health field? nurse or something?

[gracefromHHP]

I played a lot of doctor growing up ;)  

Actually about 8 or 9 years ago I decided it was time to learn more about my herpes and got online and realized how little I knew about it.  Being in the medical profession I thought it was absurd how little I knew so I went about reading, reading and more reading. Then I started attending conferences on herpes and std's and then before I knew it - I had become a resource myself and started to become "known" in the herpes world - both online and off.  My profile here lists where I'm involved with.  I'm even co-presenting a poster at the 2008 cdc conference :)  ( big step for me! )   I've made some terrific friends and contacts while doing this and it's just something I enjoy doing. I've never , ever thought of my herpes as being an issue. I hope to help others feel confident enough about their own herpes that it isn't much of an issue for them either. Plus there are just some questions you can't sit and ask your doctor so having an online source to ask them at is invaluable I feel. To boot - hmo's have made sure that doc's have less and less time to spend with their patients so you almost have to turn to other resources nowadays to learn what you really need to learn. Also even though the herpes blood tests are pretty easy to learn - obviously from all the posters here it's something many medical professionals just aren't up to date on :(

Oh and I still love to play doctor ;)

grace

[shocker13]

OK so i just wanna know how do you know so dang much stuff about this?  It is so overwhelming to me.  I really dont want to go to the gyn tomorrow.  I actually have never gone, i know thats terrible.  I wish there was a way to get some meds without going to the doctor.  Its funny i work in a hospital everyday, but i absolutly hate going for myself.

I will look into the planned parenthood, otherwise i just told him to make an apt with the doctor that my parents go to.

I dont think he will be willing to pay 100, with the christmas, and our trip coming that is enough money spent. But heck if it makes him go ill pay it, ha,ha.  I also thought i would be getting a ring on vaca.  but now with all of this going on, im not really sure if I want one.  Then I think I should stay with him, because i assume that it has to be a bit hard to date with having an std.

Well i guess I could leave the window cracked,  but you dont have to have beans everyday do you??? i hope not :)

[gracefromHHP]

call your local planned parenthood then and see if they offer type specific herpes igg blood testing. If they do - schedule an appointment thru them for him. They accept most insurances there.  Otherwise he'll have to pick a new doctor and make an appointment if he wants to use his insurance.  

He can also get tested thru www.healthcheckusa.com or www.tstd.org if he's willing to pay $100. He'll get his results in 48 hours online thru either of them if they have participating labs near you.

Beans aren't negotiable but if you drink enough margaritas and leave the window cracked things will be fine ;)

grace

[shocker13]

Yup i know what needs to be done, and I am to the point that he has no choice if he wants to be with me. So its his decision.
And if he doesnt, you may want to have ur suitcase packed :)  Its all inclusive so you can have as many margaritas as you want.  about the beans.. we will have to talk about lol.
He doesnt have a reg. doctor, neither do i lol.  We are(were) in pretty good health.  
Well i am off to work, ill look for a reply later. have a great day grace.
Amy

[gracefromHHP]

From your other post you've been with him for awhile now. You know how he is in general I'm sure.  You know what you need to do to get his butt moving ;)  

I can go to mexico with you if you want :D   I can be a heck of a lot of fun especially with a coupla margaritas under my belt :)  Though I have to warn ya - I really like beans...he he he

He's got his insurance card now so he has no excuses left.  If he doesn't have a regular doctor he'll have to get one though and make an appointment to be seen to get his testing. If he has a regular doctor - he can call, tell them what he needs done and they can arrange for him to stop in for a blood test.

grace

[shocker13]

Hey grace,
thanks a lot for your input, I will definatly find out tomorrow at my appt. to see what type i have.  And I did get mad and I really am thinking about the whole relationship.  I really hope he does it next week because we have a trip to mexico planned on the 7th, and i really want it to be a good one!!
Yea, maybe i need to ask his parents to make him to go lol...Or maybe the threat of telling his mom would be enough for him to go in.. The parents always are able to force us to do stuff ha,ha.
Thanks again!

[gracefromHHP]

Most folks who have hsv2 have no idea they have it until tested for it. I think we all have a good sense of denial about things in general and will make up excuses until the cows come home if need be instead of going to the doctor's and risk hearing those words of "you've got an std".  Of course the other end of the spectrum - running to the clinic everytime you feel any itch/pain/tingle in your body isn't very helpful either :(  It's unfortunate that the medical profession in general I think doesn't take std's, especially herpes, seriously so they really don't do a good job on health teaching about them.  I think at this point most folks assume we've all gotten the wear a condom message and leave it at that :(

Anyways - yes your gyn can follow up on this for you and prescribe medication for you and find out the results of your lesion cultures for you. If it only came back as hsv+ and not specifically hsv1 or hsv2 - INSIST they call the lab and get a typing added to it. This is the easiest way for you to find out if you have hsv1 or hsv2 now. Otherwise it will involve additional blood testing for you.  After the new year is over - get on your man's case and drag his butt to the clinic for a type specific herpes igg blood test too. He'll need to know what he has - not for the purpose of placing blame - but so that you two can make educated decisions about what precautions to take from here on out.  If he won't do it for you then - then get mad as hell and consider ending the relationship because of his inconsideration towards you - not because he potentially gave you herpes.  There are just some folks you can not get to go to the doctor's no matter what and you really have to ask if you want to spend a good chunk of your life with that kind of person ( though when it comes to mom and dad you have little choice about that....lol ).

grace

[waringblender]

Lose him. Getting tested for STDs if you want this from your partner should not be something they resist doing. If it's not negotiable to you, it's not negotiable. He needs to respect you and your health and well-being enough to get this done.

[shocker13]

yes I did notice something this summer it was like red and he said it was dry and he didnt know why.  I dont really think he knew what he had, but now that i think about maube he knew something was wrong and never had it checked out?  Yeah i nkow i think its wierd he doesnt to be tested, i thought it was just that we both know what the results would be

[slacker101]

Well, if he is being resistant to going to get tested, he MAY already know what he has and feels guilty. If he is infected and knew, he is guilty as charged. Have you ever noticed a cold sore on his face or on his genital any weird sores? Has there ever been a time for like a few weeks he didn't want to have sex with you? Just some indicators to see if he knows if he has it or not. Red flags have come up that he doesn't want to get tested.

[shocker13]

They took some swab cultures in the ER.  I am not sure what type I have yet, i go to a gyn this friday, do you think she will be able to prescribe the anitvirals or do I have to go to a family physician?  I dont really ever go to the doc. so i dont have a regular doctor.  They only reason that i am going to a gyn is because I have never had a pap done and the nurse practitionor i seen in the ER made me schedule to have one done and really got on my case about it!  

My boyfriend has not been tested yet, im trying really hard to get him to go in, but so far i am not having any luck.. he says he will go, its just a matter of when!.  I wish so bad that i had made him go when we first started dating and it would have saved me a lot of trouble.
thanks so much for the help, it is very much appreciated.
Amy

[gracefromHHP]

I agree with waringblender - your next step at this point is to figure out what type of herpes you have so you can make educated decisions about treatment.  This very well could even be hsv1 genitally which tends not to reoccur very often.  How did they test you for herpes in the ER?

Your regular doctor is the person to follow up with. Give them a call later on this week and ask them to check up on any testing you had done in the ER for you.  Until you find out which type you have - at least get a prescription for episodic therapy in case you start with another ob.  Antivirals work best if taken at the very first sign of an ob so having them on  hand is the best idea.  Once you know if you have hsv1 or hsv2 you can better decide if you want to continue using episodic therapy or if you want to try suppressive therapy so that you have less ob's for awhile.  

If you haven't already - be sure to read the herpes handbook and watch the patient counseling video at www.westoverheights.com. Both are terrific resources to learn more about herpes at.

grace

[waringblender]

You can get Rx's from your primary care physician. If you and the guy have both been typed for what kind of herpes you have, and you have the same kind, you can't pass it back and forth, so you wouldn't need antivirals to protect the other person. If you want antivirals to prevent outbreaks and make your life more comfortable with herpes, then you should take them. Talk to your doctor, make sure you know which type of herpes you and the boyfriend have, and go from there.