You feel more ill owing to the immune response rather than the virus itself. Yes this partner will almost certainly be the source, I would mention to him that he has likely infected you with HSV2. As such, there are no issues regarding sex with him.
Unprotected oral but protected vaginal a week previous to the initial outbreak. Have yet to speak to my partner about it unfortunately but fairly certain I got it off him rather than it being dormant in my system for a long time- I got terribly sick with the outbreak as well which I read can happen when the virus first spreads through the body.
Did that fit with sexual history in the few days before the lesions appeared, lots of oral and vaginal sex unprotected?
Yes I had two swabs- one on a lesion on my genitals and one on a coldsore on my lip. Both appeared around the same time and both were HSV2 positive.
I suppose I am just going to have to wait it out and get used to my own symptoms to be able to recognise when I'm about to have an outbreak. It is just frustrating not knowing, and every single little itch or sting I get I immediately worry it's herpes.
Did you have a swab to conclude this was HSV2?
If you're having sex with a HSV2 positive person then you can be more lenient on your suspicions as to whether this is an outbreak.
Otherwise sometimes it is hard to tell. Sometimes it is obvious, feeling rundown then there's a tingle where a patch starts to appear within hours. Other times I do get little bumps that take a day to realise they are a cold sore as opposed to something else.