In need of support from people that understand.........

[jess816]

Hi everyone my name is Jessica and I am 26. My husband and I have had 3 miscarriages and i found out after my second one that I have Factor V Leiden. I have a lot of faith but I am starting to lose hope that we will ever become parents. miscarriages are a very hard emotional thing to go through and even though I have wonderful family and friends to lean on they have never been through what I have been through, and thought that being able to talk with people that know how I feel would help me out.

[BP0629]

You have come to the right place for support & understanding. I lost twins in August & then became pregnant again right after (before having a cycle again) & they thought I had 2nd MC in October which turned into a tubal. My family & friends tried their best, but the words they used were always wrong & then I found the ladies here. I haven't went for any testing (drs seem to think it best to wait until your 3rd MC) but my doctor has me doing a baby aspirin a day that i'll continue taking until wk 28 (when/if I get pregnant again), double pre-natal vitamin, double iron, & folic acid. I'm sorry to hear that you've experienced the loss of a child. It is a very emotional/physical event to go through. I don't think that I even have words to say to make anything better, just know that we've all been there & are here for you. I wish you much success w/ trying again. Don't give up hope!!! We're here for you & always remember, there are no silly questions.

[jess816]

Thank you all for your kind words. to start Factor V is a blood clotting disorder. My blood clots to much causing my miscarriages. the Doctors said that the blood clots suffocate the fetus causing miscarriages. They have me on 1 baby aspirin a day and when I get pregnant I have to start taking lovenox (heparin) shots everyday in my stomach for the whole 9 months. I am willing to do anything the Dr's tell me but the problem is my HCG levels don't go up causing me to miscarry early on. My 1st was at 6 weeks, my 2nd 8 weeks, and my 3 was just 5 weeks. I can't start taking the shot till my HCG levels double within the 2 days. Evey time i go for blood work they drop.
I am grateful that I found this site with all the support b/c even though I have a big, loving supportive family they don't get what I'm going though. Sometimes when I think about it I can just sit down and cry for hours at a time. I would have to say this is the hardest thing that I ever had to go through in my life. So I'm very grateful for you all and thank you..
Jess

[mikaleen]

I'm sorry for your losses.  Have they put you on baby aspirin or heparin for the clotting?  I know it's hard to keep faith, but there have been many stories on here where women with clotting disorders have had m/c after m/c, and after diagnosis have been able to bring a healthy pregnancy to term.  It's hard when there is no one close who understands what you are going through.  My FIL actually asked me if it was worth it after my last m/c.  He didn't mean it in a bad way, but he saw how much pain I was in physically and emotionally.  There are so many women on here who are in different stages and it's so nice to see how we heal emotionally and physiaclly and how so many are pregnant now or trying to become.  Take it one day at a time and you'll make it throught he dark days and have better days. I wish you luck and I hope treatment helps you!

[ArmyPrincess819]

I'm sorry for your losses. I myself have had 6 one was at 14 wks and another at 19 the rest were early in pg. It's a painful time mentally physically and emotionally. You almost feel isolated and sorely misunderstood. You are left with so many unanswered questions but the one that always remains is "Why me"?. We feel like it had to be something we did or we blame our bodies. It stays for a lifetime. Part of the healing process is trying to find a way to manage our pain so it becomes less visable to the surface. We have to find a medium ground so that the loss does not control our lives and every thought. What have your dr's said about ttc? I'm not familiar with what you have been diagnosed with. Have you thought about counseling or finding a support group? How has your dh been. If you want you can leave me a message. I'm glad you posted we have all been in your shoes or still wearing them. I wish you the best. Please take care. I'm here if you ever need to talk.
AP-Community Leader

[smr08]

I'm sorry for your losses. You've come to the right place for support and understanding. Like melo I'm also not sure about Factor V Leiden. Is it something that can prevent you from carrying full term? I know that at times we become discouraged but thats when we need to pull from our inner strength. I had my third loss in Oct. and I'm now 41 and sometimes feel like time is running out. I wish you the best and hope that we can help you through this difficult time.

                   Lori

[melo1224]

I'm soo sorry to hear about your losses. There's a lot of supportive people on this forum so you have come to the right place. I'm amazed at the stories these ladies have, we are strong women!!!

I've had two m/c's myself. I have not gone for any major testing yet but I know the stress related to thinking you will not have a family. Can you tell us a little about Factor C Leiden? I'm not familar with that. How far along were you when you had the m/c's?

You/we all  just have to keep the faith, there's no other choice really. We obviously can't give up b/c it takes determination to get through the emotional roller coster. It's tough to manage the physical parts of a m/c and the emotional part affects everyone differently. I hope you find the support that you're looking for here.

Keep us all posted! big hugs