Knee problem

[michelleric]

I guess I am here to complain, vent, need some inspiring words perhaps?

I have been sick for at least 2 weeks. Finished antibiotic today, no help, worse actually.  Going to call PCP tomorrow. Haven't slept from this horrific cough in about a week.  Not good for my mental health and physical.  My ribs and head hurt.  (I have had this 2 times in my life and actually broke a rib each time.)

The main issue at the moment is my left knee.  I wear a brace on my right leg for foot drop, for about 2 years.  From compensating for my gait, I "ruined" my leg knee.  My grandma and my mom had terrible arthritis early in life.  They were both born with dislocated hips which was a big factor with their arthritis.  I too, have/had a bit of trouble with congenital hip issues, but not dislocated.  I also have a congenitally small spine, which led to my 2 herniated discs in my neck, that led to surgery 2 years ago.

Anyway, last week I had an U/S and Xray of my knee. (PCP was afraid of a blood clot, as I have a history of those as well, just not in my leg, I have been am  coumadin for over 4 years now, and will be for life).

PCP called, and told me no blood clot, thank G-d, which I already knew from ultrasonographer.

But the xray showed very narrowing something space, with cartilage almost gone and it is bone on bone,  I also have bone spurs as well.  I see him this week for F/U. He said my gait has progressed the arthritis in my left knee. He will be sending me to a rheumatologist. I am in so much pain. I have been doing swim aerobics for the last 2 months, and have really trying to become healthier and lose weight.  I know that is a factor as well.

I am just really down, discouraged and depressed right now.  Tears are flowing, and the cough continues.  I know lots of my emotions are from lack of sleep, fever, and sickness.  My hubby brought up my moms walker, and I need it.  I foresee a wheelchair in my future sooner than later.

I also need to give notice at work this week.  It has been too stressful, neuro has STRONGLY advised me to quit many many months ago.  It is an ongoing conversation I have with her.  But now with the knee it is a must.  My job involved standing constantly.

Cant believe it. I am 43 going on 100.

So sad right now.  Thanks for listening,  Michelle

I know there are so so many people worse off, but at the moment I am seeing the glass half empty.  In the woe is me place. stinks.

[Lulu54]

hey sweetie, hang in there and go to the ER if necessary.  Don't think you have to tough it out until the morning if it gets worse.  - L

[piggygirl17]

Don't forget to give yourself a moment to say the reality either.  It isn't fair, it's not fun, and it is very very hard to stay positive in the midst of pain and sickness.  Allow yourself to feel those emotions (you're allowed), but then take a deep breath and keep moving forward.  

Look in your little boys eyes and remember how much you love him and how much joy he brings you.  Give your husband a hug, and feel the warmth that he brings your heart.

You can do it!

[michelleric]

Thank you all.  Well, I jumped off the emotional ledge.  After speaking with Mary (twopack) last night, she calmed me down and she made me realize I was WAY ahead of myself here.

I am trying to take things slower on the medical front, and not jumping to the "final" conclusion.  My mind tends to see the worst at first.

Yes, my respiratory issues need to be addressed before anything else.  PCP told me to go to ER today, thinks I might have pneumonia. He wanted the ER docs there to treat me and if there was a chance of admitting me it would be easier.  I asked him about having a chest xray. and then he could read it and tell me what to do, trying to avoid the high cost of the ER. He said that would be ok.  (1st he gave a a stronger antibiotic, 2 inhalers and another med for the nebulizer.)  He then had me hold off on these, until I hear back from him about the xray. The Xray  was to be read ASAP. The tech said he would get the results in 1 hour.

This was about 10 this morning.  I called, but the office was closed for lunch.  Then I didnt call until about 4.  Nurse said  they never got the results, and she had my chart waiting.  She would "look into it".  Well, it is now 9:30 at night. and that was that.

Really the medical stuff is very frustrating.  I have an appt with him in the A.M., and have been using my kids nebulizer today.  I am also on my 2nd bottle of nyquil.

So that is where it stands. Nothing done, although I did my part by calling and getting the XRay.  I will go to the ER tonight if I get any worse.  My son Gabriel has it now in his chest.  We are lying together with the Nebulizer between us. Looks like a trip to the pediatrician as well.  He is already on an antibiotic for the last 6 days.

Thanks again to you all, and I will think about my knee some other day,
Michelle

[twopack]

Hey Michelle.  Breathing demands attention first.  Since your lungs aren't getting relief they are making your life miserable.  Take care of them before making any other decisions.

Surgery sounds terrible and is certainly NOT on anyone's list of summer fun.  BUT it can give a relatively quick and lasting fix to what ails ya in some situations.  It's always worth considering and seldom ruled impossible purely because of pre-existing health conditions.  If you ask a doc to inject your head (more than once!) you can probably make it through surgery that will make you feel better in the end.

This is not a good time for making decisions about things that have long term consequences.  I'm on my way to work and quitting sounds good right now.  By payday, I know I'd be thinking there must have been a better solution.  If your employer hasn't guessed already, tell her you need some extended time off to recover from recent health problems.  When you feel better you will be able to see more options and can make the right decision for yourself.

Breathe free and full.
Mary

[HVAC]

Having torn ACLs twice in my right knee and then having had surgery to shave the knee because bone was hitting bone I can say a bum knee really hurts. It is up there with one of the worst pains I have experienced. After the surgery 30 years ago my knee has been great. My left knee has needed surgery for 15 years and I just have not been able to afford it but it is nothing like the right knee. Knee replacements are horrible to go through but if they talk about going in athroscopically and shaving the inside it is not a bad deal.

I am sorry what you have is really painful.

Alex

[Lulu54]

Michelle, you just can't catch a break lately.... that has to change soon.  It's too bad that you are dealing with so many issues at once rather than one at a time.

I hope the doctor has suggestions for the knee to give you relief.  Surgery might be an option, so keep your mind open.  I am especially glad that your problems isn't more blood clots.

Using mom's walker certainly conjured up all sorts of memories for you as well as the understandable depression.  

I wish there was something I could add here other than letting you know how much we care and send you lots of gentle hugs.

Lulu

[rendean]

Dear Michelle,

Being sick for so long s*cks, especially the coughing/broken rib issue. I wish you could get some sleep . It would mentally improve your outlook, at least in the short term.

As for the walker, You only need the walker because of your arthritic knee. If it's bone on bone the treatment is total knee replacement. A good friend of mine just had it done. She said ,(after the first 2 weeks) she should have done it years ago.

I realize pain is pain be it physical or mental , arthritis or MS, coughing or falling, etc. But, there will be a brighter days. Remember how good you felt after the steroids? Well it will happen again.

As for giving up your job, you  are in good company here on the forum. There are lots of us that have done it whether it was our idea or the employer's. It's a big hurdle to jump but you can do it. I know you can and you know you can.

Feel free to vent about the job issue here. We all get it too!

Keep us updated on your health, after your PCP appointment tomorrow.

Huge, but gentle, hugs,
Ren

[meg321]

Michelle,
I feel so bad for you,  I can feel your pain, that term fits us so much of the time.  Your pain is your pain, noone else's.

I am a  bit down myself today  but it will pass.  MS can make you feel just the way you are feeling..and we seem to have other medical issues along with it.

I pray that you get to feeling better soon, I know it will pass but its just getting there.  Please try to remain positive.  That is my best tool and I know its not easy but you can do it.

You are doing a lot to help yourself too..just not standing on your feet at work will help a lot.

I will keep you in my prayers, Sweetie...

lve, meg