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Stress & Sx's
I am such an emotional basket case these days! We have had a TON of really sad news coming from family & friends over the last two weeks PLUS trying to plan for Christmas -- completely & utterly unprepared, by the way, and so worried it will be the worst Christmas ever for my 7 & 9 year old -- has me tied up in knots. I cry at the drop of a hat, I am experiencing crazy mood swings, I am exhausted and now I'm noticing that my arm & hand are worsening instead of improving.
It's been 3 months since this flare up, and I felt like I was managing the lingering symptoms pretty well. I'm on 900 mg Gabapentin/day and will up it to 1200 this weekend. It was helping, but now, I'm really struggling with the arm pain/fatigue & oversensitive/balloon-feeling fingers again. Typing is hilarious...I can only imagine how this will read when I review it later.
Anyways, kind MSers, is this increase in old Sx's due to stress? How are you handling the "most wonderful time of the year?" I just want to hole up & watch Christmas movies with my kids for the next 2 days - but prior commitments, decorating, and gift buying need to happen Sat & Sun because of working FT Mon-Fri. I feel completely DONE. And to boot, it is the busiest time of year at work for my husband, too, so he is regularly working 15 hour days and weekends. Of course he is exhausted, too.
Can we have a global, primal scream together? Anyone?????
Cheryl
It's been 3 months since this flare up, and I felt like I was managing the lingering symptoms pretty well. I'm on 900 mg Gabapentin/day and will up it to 1200 this weekend. It was helping, but now, I'm really struggling with the arm pain/fatigue & oversensitive/balloon-feeling fingers again. Typing is hilarious...I can only imagine how this will read when I review it later.
Anyways, kind MSers, is this increase in old Sx's due to stress? How are you handling the "most wonderful time of the year?" I just want to hole up & watch Christmas movies with my kids for the next 2 days - but prior commitments, decorating, and gift buying need to happen Sat & Sun because of working FT Mon-Fri. I feel completely DONE. And to boot, it is the busiest time of year at work for my husband, too, so he is regularly working 15 hour days and weekends. Of course he is exhausted, too.
Can we have a global, primal scream together? Anyone?????
Cheryl
You are not a whiner and they no longer bother me. I am just saying your kids will have a great xmas if you love them. It is not about presents or dinners it is about live. I am sure you are a great parent.
Yes Xmas is stress but I have learned it does not have to be. I still have to make my xmas cards and send them and get presents. They may not be mailed on time. I wanted a tree so that is up. We have half the lights up. My husband found my giant peace sign which he put lights on.
Last year we had dinner reservations and we got there and place was imploding. We would have had to wait three hours. The only place open was a bar. All they had were appetizers. We had chicken wings, nachos, and potato skins. We laughed and had the best time.
There are hiccups in life those make the best stories. Do not beat yourself up. I am sorry the stress is getting to you. Life is a series of moments that is what we remember. there are many Xmases and they are all different.
Be kind to yourself. You are not a bad person. Do not forget to breath that is so important. This can be any kind of xmas you want it to be. The best present you can give your family is a xmas where you are kind to yourself. How you treat yourself effects the family. You are who you are. MS effects your body. You are the same person you were before you were diagnosed.
Yes MS puts a lot of strain on the family. Finacially, emotionally, and physically. My first year I beat myself up until I realized I was making my husband miserable. With MS and Cancer I have become happy. This makes it easier for my husband. We do have leaner xmases. They are nicer xmases. We have a lot of love. Love is the whole point of all the holidays.
Every time you think of it tell your kids and husband you love them. Smile at strangers and they smile back. Just these things can make a big difference.
If you are really depressed do not be afraid to talk to a doctor or get some counseling. It is expensive but break downs are more expensive.
You are a good person. Give yourself a break.
Alex
Yes Xmas is stress but I have learned it does not have to be. I still have to make my xmas cards and send them and get presents. They may not be mailed on time. I wanted a tree so that is up. We have half the lights up. My husband found my giant peace sign which he put lights on.
Last year we had dinner reservations and we got there and place was imploding. We would have had to wait three hours. The only place open was a bar. All they had were appetizers. We had chicken wings, nachos, and potato skins. We laughed and had the best time.
There are hiccups in life those make the best stories. Do not beat yourself up. I am sorry the stress is getting to you. Life is a series of moments that is what we remember. there are many Xmases and they are all different.
Be kind to yourself. You are not a bad person. Do not forget to breath that is so important. This can be any kind of xmas you want it to be. The best present you can give your family is a xmas where you are kind to yourself. How you treat yourself effects the family. You are who you are. MS effects your body. You are the same person you were before you were diagnosed.
Yes MS puts a lot of strain on the family. Finacially, emotionally, and physically. My first year I beat myself up until I realized I was making my husband miserable. With MS and Cancer I have become happy. This makes it easier for my husband. We do have leaner xmases. They are nicer xmases. We have a lot of love. Love is the whole point of all the holidays.
Every time you think of it tell your kids and husband you love them. Smile at strangers and they smile back. Just these things can make a big difference.
If you are really depressed do not be afraid to talk to a doctor or get some counseling. It is expensive but break downs are more expensive.
You are a good person. Give yourself a break.
Alex
1 Comments
Thank you, Alex. I cannot express how important your message is to me. I am always my toughest critic and have a hard time quieting the mean chatter that seems to be unrelenting inside my brain. Your words about how this impacts a family really resonated with me. I have been trying to adjust this unhelpful thinking over the last several months. Clearly, I am a work in progress!
Cheryl
Cheryl
Lower expectations or get rid of them all together. As a child I had bad Xmases. An alcoholic mother with borderline personality disorder. A sister who was a drug addict who sexually molested me. A grand father who was a drunk and threatened to kill himself every day.
A bad xmas for me was when they took all my presents back to the store. Or having to wrap my own presents.
I did not care about presents. I just wanted family peace.
A bad xmas for me was when they took all my presents back to the store. Or having to wrap my own presents.
I did not care about presents. I just wanted family peace.
1 Comments
Oh my word. I am sorry for your awful Christmas memories, and I apologize if I played a role in bringing them into the forefront. I can only imagine what a whiner I must look like to you. Truly, I am very sorry.
Oh hon, this is a classic example of how things change with MS. No one can predict sad news (especially in bulk) but the holidays (for me at least) have been toned down substantially since my diagnosis.
Scream your head off!! I encourage that (preferably without witnesses so you don't get considered for a padded room with crayons - no matter how much you would like the break).
I truly think stress is aggravating your symptoms. I understand wanting the holidays to be perfect for your children but you have new limits this year and plowing through them will not be good for you at all.
Is there a way to do some "new" traditions and have the kids more involved in things that would give you extra family time and much needed help. Maybe some can even be removed (more habit than necessity?).
I did a lot of gift buying online this year to avoid the hassle of shopping. That might be an option for you next year.
If there is a chance you can reduce your commitments that would be good too.
Don't beat yourself up, no one plans to get MS and until you've gone through these types of situations you don't see the need to schedule your life a bit differently.
In the meantime, take lots of breaks. I know of some folks who have a nap quickly when they get home from work. If you have late evenings planned that will go a long way to helping you out.
That reminds me that I have some energy saving tips, fresh my OT this morning. I'm going to do a separate post.
Screaming with you!!!
Corrie
Scream your head off!! I encourage that (preferably without witnesses so you don't get considered for a padded room with crayons - no matter how much you would like the break).
I truly think stress is aggravating your symptoms. I understand wanting the holidays to be perfect for your children but you have new limits this year and plowing through them will not be good for you at all.
Is there a way to do some "new" traditions and have the kids more involved in things that would give you extra family time and much needed help. Maybe some can even be removed (more habit than necessity?).
I did a lot of gift buying online this year to avoid the hassle of shopping. That might be an option for you next year.
If there is a chance you can reduce your commitments that would be good too.
Don't beat yourself up, no one plans to get MS and until you've gone through these types of situations you don't see the need to schedule your life a bit differently.
In the meantime, take lots of breaks. I know of some folks who have a nap quickly when they get home from work. If you have late evenings planned that will go a long way to helping you out.
That reminds me that I have some energy saving tips, fresh my OT this morning. I'm going to do a separate post.
Screaming with you!!!
Corrie
1 Comments
Thank you for your understanding, empathy & suggestions. I am sure I will adjust to this - in the meantime, the tears are just constantly under the surface. This, too, shall pass.
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