Aa
Compulsive with catching STD's
Hello to all.
I am a 26 years old guy that just graduate. I have a good job and good contacts. I live in Brazil and I'm married. I love and trust my wife for everything.
Wasn't everything suppose to be very good in my life? Well it is not. Actually, I'm very, very depressed and feeling really bad. I can't work well. Actually, I'm at work right now, but I'm feeling so bad that I just can't do the things I have to.
I don't know well why that started, but has been two years that I think everything is going to infect me. I've done some posts (with another account which I've lost acces) in the STD's forums, but I know "logically" that I'm not suppose to worry about catching STD's.
My last problems have been about dentists. I've started using braces, because I really need to correct some problems with my teeth and jaw. I started my treatment with a dentist that sometimes didn't wear glooves. That made me crazy and then I could not trust him anymore. Since I could not trust him anymore, I wouldn't go to his office again, so I took the braces out myself with pliers, payed him to get all my exams back, and restarted my treatment with another dentist.
Everything seems to be well until two events. At one time he wasn't wearing a mask and then, later, he opened the door of his office with the glooves that he was using to work on me and, when he returned (with some kind of stuff he couldn't find inside the office), he didn't switch the gloves. So, again, I was not beeing able to trust him. That time, however, I took a different approach. I've decided to talk to him and explain my problem and ask him to be very, very cautious with me, because I have OCD. He said he undestands, and that he had never done anything wrong but, if I feel something is wrong, he asked me to tell him at the time the incident happens.
Now I'm feeling that he is going to do something wrong exactly because I've asked him not to do so. Like not sterelizing some of his stuff or doing something when I can't see him. I've also did some posts on dentists forums/blogs here in Brazil, saying that I was worried about he not switching his glooves (as anonymous, without saying his name, but with a very small chance that he could read and then connect that post to me, because I told my city, e-mail, and the history about the other dentist, which I told him explaining why I've switched). Now I'm now afraid that he could punish me because of my posts (not this one, because I'm writing in english and doing questions on ODC forums), or my behavior of saying he is not doing his job well.
I don't know exactly what to do, I've done therapy for three years, but I'm not doing right now. Should I just trust him, because he said he understands? Should I seek another dentist because of his flaws?
Thank you very much.
I am a 26 years old guy that just graduate. I have a good job and good contacts. I live in Brazil and I'm married. I love and trust my wife for everything.
Wasn't everything suppose to be very good in my life? Well it is not. Actually, I'm very, very depressed and feeling really bad. I can't work well. Actually, I'm at work right now, but I'm feeling so bad that I just can't do the things I have to.
I don't know well why that started, but has been two years that I think everything is going to infect me. I've done some posts (with another account which I've lost acces) in the STD's forums, but I know "logically" that I'm not suppose to worry about catching STD's.
My last problems have been about dentists. I've started using braces, because I really need to correct some problems with my teeth and jaw. I started my treatment with a dentist that sometimes didn't wear glooves. That made me crazy and then I could not trust him anymore. Since I could not trust him anymore, I wouldn't go to his office again, so I took the braces out myself with pliers, payed him to get all my exams back, and restarted my treatment with another dentist.
Everything seems to be well until two events. At one time he wasn't wearing a mask and then, later, he opened the door of his office with the glooves that he was using to work on me and, when he returned (with some kind of stuff he couldn't find inside the office), he didn't switch the gloves. So, again, I was not beeing able to trust him. That time, however, I took a different approach. I've decided to talk to him and explain my problem and ask him to be very, very cautious with me, because I have OCD. He said he undestands, and that he had never done anything wrong but, if I feel something is wrong, he asked me to tell him at the time the incident happens.
Now I'm feeling that he is going to do something wrong exactly because I've asked him not to do so. Like not sterelizing some of his stuff or doing something when I can't see him. I've also did some posts on dentists forums/blogs here in Brazil, saying that I was worried about he not switching his glooves (as anonymous, without saying his name, but with a very small chance that he could read and then connect that post to me, because I told my city, e-mail, and the history about the other dentist, which I told him explaining why I've switched). Now I'm now afraid that he could punish me because of my posts (not this one, because I'm writing in english and doing questions on ODC forums), or my behavior of saying he is not doing his job well.
I don't know exactly what to do, I've done therapy for three years, but I'm not doing right now. Should I just trust him, because he said he understands? Should I seek another dentist because of his flaws?
Thank you very much.
Best Answer
Still, try not to worry about it. It would be a very, very long shot that your particular dentist on monitoring that site. So take a deep breath and just tell him what you need and you know what, if he is not receptive to you then you can find someone else to take over your care. But I really don't think you are going to be met with hostility. It will all work out.
I'm not worried about these posts, here in MedHelp. Actually I'm worried about other posts I did in a Brazilian blog, about dentists (on a biosecurity subject). I told there that my dentist was breaking those biosecurity rules (by touching things, like the doorknob, and not switching glooves after that). I've also told my history, my mail and my city, because at that time I was looking for another dentist, so that they could contact me. That's why I'm worried =p.
Nice your power came back =), I can't stand one single day without showering, hehe.
Nice your power came back =), I can't stand one single day without showering, hehe.
Hang in there, I promise the posts will not be read by your doctor. He probably does not even know about MedHelp. I think it is a great place and I tell people about it, but in this case, just don't even mention it :) I hope your days get better and better.
My power just came on...I'm very, very happy...finally got a shower! Take care.
My power just came on...I'm very, very happy...finally got a shower! Take care.
That is crazy. Where I live, in south of Brazil, we never have hurricanes or earthquakes, or snow =p. Actually, we do have winter here, and there are places around that snow sometimes (because of altitude) but not where I live. I hope everything comeback to normal as soon as possible =).
And yes, I'm feeling better today. I'm beeing able to work better also. Only the posts I did are still haunting me. I've never offended anyone, I've just said that I've considered what he have done a mistake. And I wrote in portuguese in a Brazilian blog. Not sure how many ppl see that blog because my post was the first on that subject...
And yes, I'm feeling better today. I'm beeing able to work better also. Only the posts I did are still haunting me. I've never offended anyone, I've just said that I've considered what he have done a mistake. And I wrote in portuguese in a Brazilian blog. Not sure how many ppl see that blog because my post was the first on that subject...
Sorry about your father-in-law...hopefully he will be healthy again soon.
About the dentist, I promise you they are not on these forums. I think you are doing the best thing. Sit down with the dentist and discuss your fears. Just come right out and say I have OCD and I worry about things that other people don't so can we please do things this way so that my anxiety stays in check. I am sure they will be sympathetic to your needs. And yes, your fears about what you posted on the dental forum are another irrational thought. Part of OCD is second guessing everything we do and this is what you are doing. It does seem that the meds are helping you some since you said "Today I'm feeling a little better."
As far as the meds go, just get some clarification about what they were prescribed to do. This is also not something to worry about but rather just a way to educate yourself as to what you are taking and why.
I am in Maryland. We had I think officially 7 inches of rain. I still have no power since Saturday and I am running on a generator that we keep constantly going. I have no running water but the generator gives me internet, tv and the fridge! So better than nothing. My boys were supposed to start the first day of school today...it was cancelled. They are happy! :) After the earthquake and now the hurricane, I'm pretty much done with the environment wreaking havoc.
About the dentist, I promise you they are not on these forums. I think you are doing the best thing. Sit down with the dentist and discuss your fears. Just come right out and say I have OCD and I worry about things that other people don't so can we please do things this way so that my anxiety stays in check. I am sure they will be sympathetic to your needs. And yes, your fears about what you posted on the dental forum are another irrational thought. Part of OCD is second guessing everything we do and this is what you are doing. It does seem that the meds are helping you some since you said "Today I'm feeling a little better."
As far as the meds go, just get some clarification about what they were prescribed to do. This is also not something to worry about but rather just a way to educate yourself as to what you are taking and why.
I am in Maryland. We had I think officially 7 inches of rain. I still have no power since Saturday and I am running on a generator that we keep constantly going. I have no running water but the generator gives me internet, tv and the fridge! So better than nothing. My boys were supposed to start the first day of school today...it was cancelled. They are happy! :) After the earthquake and now the hurricane, I'm pretty much done with the environment wreaking havoc.
I had to travel this weekend because my wife's father is hospitalized =(, so I couldn't post earlier. Fortunately he is getting better already and we believe he will be soon at home.
About my therapy, I'll try to meet the therapist this week, and among our talk ask those questions about the medications.
On wednesday I need to see the dentist. I realize now that, since I've already talked to him about my OCD, and he said he understands, I'll just ask him about everything that could make me anxious. I think this is a better approach than giving up of my treatment, since, like I've already said, I really need to correct my teeth and jaw.
Today I'm feeling a little better. There is only one thing that is still in my head. I'm afraid that my dentist could read some of posts I did in a dentist blog about those things I've talked already and relate that to me. I didn't say any name or told any lie, I was just asking questions. Is this just another irrational tought ?
By the way, where are you from? Is everything ok after the hurricane ? I saw on the news that NY is ok.
Best wishes.
About my therapy, I'll try to meet the therapist this week, and among our talk ask those questions about the medications.
On wednesday I need to see the dentist. I realize now that, since I've already talked to him about my OCD, and he said he understands, I'll just ask him about everything that could make me anxious. I think this is a better approach than giving up of my treatment, since, like I've already said, I really need to correct my teeth and jaw.
Today I'm feeling a little better. There is only one thing that is still in my head. I'm afraid that my dentist could read some of posts I did in a dentist blog about those things I've talked already and relate that to me. I didn't say any name or told any lie, I was just asking questions. Is this just another irrational tought ?
By the way, where are you from? Is everything ok after the hurricane ? I saw on the news that NY is ok.
Best wishes.
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First of all, you won't get an STD from the doctor not wearing gloves after he touches a doorknob. Now if the flu were going around, then maybe. But you did the right thing and asked the doctor to wear the gloves. I promise you that he will in no way do something that would intentionally harm you. This is just another irrational thought. So you don't need to switch doctors. Actually, everytime you do switch doctors, you are giving into the thought and that just makes it worse. It is kind of like adding gasoline to a fire. So just keep on communicating with your doctors about what you need for them to do.
When you were in therapy, what did it do for you? Was it just talk therapy? Did they teach you techniques to combat these irrational thoughts? Were you ever on medication? Why did you stop going to therapy?
It is very, very hard to get a handle on OCD without outside help. There are self-coaching skills you can learn, and you have to try not to avoid the situations that bother you but professional help is really the only way.
Here is a little story about me. I developed a phobia about HIV. I worried about it all the time. What I ended up doing was going and sitting in an AIDS clinic. I sat in the same chairs that the patients sat in. I picked up the same magazines that they picked up, I stayed there for an hour every other day. After this exposure therapy, I was over it. Case solved. Of course it was replaced with some other stupid irrational thought but I just dealt with that one too. For me though, I have to be on medication or I would not be able to function.