If she isn't ready you cannot force the issue. Some kids take longer than others. Don't push, let her have that small measure of control, she will know when she is ready : )
Hey she's interested in the toilet (likes to flush it, will sit on it) so you're getting there. But Andi is right do not force the issue it will only lead to worse things and draw the process out way longer.
A few things that helped me when I worked in daycare, books on potty training (kids books) and movies like I know Bear in the Big Blue House has a video episode about it. It makes it fun and interesting.
And when she finally does actually pee on the potty - make a big deal out of it, a dance and a song and a reward. Potty training has to be all about positive reinforcement no matter how frustrated you get that cannot come through. She'll do it in her own time. Was she a bit later in other stages? like walking and crawling and talking? She may just be slower with this don't worry too much yet.
Oh, the "potty dance" was huge in my house. We had one for pee and poopy and my kids loved it!! Also, my kids don't get candy often, so we used the candy the accumulated from Halloween, Easter, and Christmas as potty prizes for a short while to give them their positive reinforcement.
we just put our son in big boy underwear (on a weekend when we had all the time to send teaching him). We took him to the potty every 1 1/2 to 2 hrs and within 4 to 5 days he was completely poty trained. If he did have an accident in his underwear he didn't like the way it felt, so he learned to just go to the potty.Explain that everyone uses the potty and diapers are for babies not big girls..... that also seemed to help our son (he wanted to do everything daddy does).
well thank you everyone and i appeciate the hel , i will up date on her training thank you again