frustrating 7 yr old

[amazing2009]

My nephew is 7 yr old, and very intelligent.  He is being raised by his elderly grandparents because his Mother is a drug addict.  He does very well in school, but when he is home, he becomes very loud, disobeys and throws tantrums.  I took him to visit a friend and there was a 2 1/2 yr old there, he played ok with him, but pretty much defied whatever I asked him to do.  He seems to ignore everyone's requests.  I would tell him not to do something, and he would stop, then go back and do it again.  Even when one of the men that was there, said to do what I said, he ignored them also.  He seems to have no boundaries.  I would like to take him places with me, but I will not tolerate this behavior.  Even if he does obey me, I am afraid, that when he goes back home, he will revert back to his old ways.  I noticed that he is constantly criticized by his grandparents, and is never given positive reinforcement.  I really hate that, but what can I do do change things.  My sister raised her own children and they acted the same way.  What can be done?? Military school may be an option, although I doubt the grandparents would go for that, as they can't see anything they are doing is wrong.

[margypops]

You are also critising him it seems he gets that all round, it is not unusual for children not to want to do what adults 'tell'them to do, have you tried asking him to help you, perhaps he is busy playing when you ask we are all like that, children are the same when they are busy. My feeling is that everyone is on this childs case and he cut use you all cutting him some slack,How about sports, games with him, outside activities weather permitting , Fun , if he is having a happy time you may find he is more obliging ..walk in his shoes ...