Monster in Law

[ollyxv]

Hi everyone,

I need help finding a solution to dealing with my mother in law. I will just say I absolutely despise her and I have tried so hard to make it work, but if another thing comes up I think I'm gonna go crazy.
I am putting up with her because my husband has practically no family anymore and I feel terrible for him. His family is severly messed up (A LOT of problems. his dad's a woman beater, his brother sexually assaulted me... they've ruined our lives in a lot of different ways) and my husband has already cut quite a few of them out to make our lives better. It goes both ways as well, a lot of his family has cut him off.

Anyway, literally his whole family is insane. Including his mother. She is a complete  b****  and I keep trying to take it and like I said, if one more thing happens I don't know if I want to see her ever again or let her see my baby. The problem is, I know my husband will defend her because he never defends me when it comes to her.

This woman is evil. There are many incidents, to name a few:
- She yelled at me at dinner because my parents didn't go over (she didn't even invite them herself, she told my husband to ask them and he forgot)
- My baby may have down syndrome and she said it is the most terrible thing in the world
- She abuses animals (this bothers me. I love animals and she has killed and tortured cats and went on to brag about it...)
- I bought her a Christmas gift one year and she threw it aside and said it was disgusting and she didn't like it
- She said she hopes the baby has blue eyes like her and not brown like mine
- She is really mean to me all the time. Anytime I say anything she rolls her eyes at me or says something rude. I never say anything back
- She told my aunt at my wedding that she was glad she never had a daughter (referring to me)
- She continues to talk to us about the brother who sexually assaulted me when my husband has asked that she please not (we cut him off... obviously for that reason and many others)

The list goes on. I just don't know what to do. For the time being, I just want her to stop talking about her other son. Luckily, I barely see her and neither does my husband but when we do or when he talks to her on the phone, he's all she talks about and I can't stand it. I haven't told her personally to stop yet.

My problem is, as I mentioned, I know it was hard for my husband to cut off his other family and I know he doesn't want to let go of his mom, so I have never said anything to her or even respond when she's mean and rude because I know if I do she's gonna flip out and we'll get into a fight. But now I'm starting to think maybe I should have spoke my mind a long time ago.

I guess, if something does go wrong again which it probably will, what do I do? Should I just start being a  b**** ? How can I get my husband to stand up a little more?
I don't even want this woman near my child. It's killing me every day to know when he gets here she thinks she has some sort of grandma status already when she's done  s***  for us. I don't think she deserves to even be in his life.

I'm honestly having nightmares about the woman over this. I'm going nuts.

I need advice, please.

[ollyxv]

Thanks guys. I really think I need to start standing up to her as well. I'm going to next time, whenever that may be. And if she has a problem with it, too bad and she'd better not because she's made my life a living hell for years and it'll be my turn!
:) I needed a boost of confidence. Thank you. ♡

[tinatheturtle]

Wow maybe his dad needed to knock some sense into her...you should totally speak your mind love, even if it does mean your being a total B----! Maybe she thinks she can just run all over you since you dont say anything. .be more assertive. It might cause some problems with your man but you let him know he's not a child anymore to always be on his moms side.. he has a new family he needs to protect.

[mckaylas_momma1018]

Next time she starts in you need to in a very polite and respectful manner and tone tell her she is being disrespectful and you don't appreciate it. If she starts a fight over it... then she is being childish... The important thing is to maintain your composure so she is the one who looks like an @$$hole.

[grizzlace]

Just breathe. She sounds like an evil woman. You have every right to protect your child. Make your hubby see it and speak your mind to both of them. Her negativity will just ruin everything. Best of luck.

[ollyxv]

Also, nothing has happened too recently besides her being a ***** at my baby shower about a month ago. I barely see the woman. So I wasn't gonna bring anything up to my husband but honestly I'm thinking about this so much I'm wondering if I should tell him how I feel... except I know he'll probably get upset. He's already not telling her when I go into labor (obviously... just incase baby does end up with DS, we're gonna have to tell her so she doesn't flip her ****).
I'm just stressing majorly. I don't know.