body image

[renechips]

Pre-pregnancy I never felt that I deserved the praise my husband gave me over my body. I was 5'3 and 118lbs in pretty decent shape. Once I reached my 2nd trimester I was so confident in my body and had never been so happy with it even with my stretch marks. My husband compliments me all the time and I accept what he says with gratitude. I'm 39 weeks pregnant now and felt sexy until last morning when I walked in on my husband watching porn. The night before I was practically begging him for sex but understood that he was tired. When I realized what he was doing last morning it shattered me. He hasn't watched porn in years. I'm scared for him to see my body now especially when I give birth. He's supposed to be my support during labor and birth but now I don't feel confident that I want him there. I've been trying to sleep all night but I keep having dreams of having an unassisted homebirth all alone because I don't want anyone to see me like that. I went from being happy and on top of the world to guilty over letting pregnancy change my body and no longer being desirable to my husband.

[expecting6thbaby]

Why do women say it is ok for their guy to watch porn. It's not ok.  I had that problem with my husband with my last preg.  My husband started cheating on me because he did not find me attractive. I begged for sex and he would say he was tired.  He even did it when I was in the hospital in premature labor and he did not know if I was losing the baby.   When I found out he first acted like I was at fault when that did not make it go away. He begged for forgiveness and said he would go to counciling when I agreed he won't go now and acts like nothing happened.  To my defense I don't look bad I wear size 7 and feel great in a bikini.  People always say how good I look. To top it off my body was near perfect and I never wanted to ruin it with kids or get married and tried to talk him out of it. My guy on the other hand wanted lots of kids and to get married. I wanted him to be happy

[Amy1830]

I know I would feel the same way as you do. I haven't caught my fiancé looking at porn but I have a feeling he has recently. He normally doesn't but I'm 36 weeks and we haven't been having sex lately because its become painful to me. The last time we tried he was saying things that sounded like porn talk and I've never heard him say them before. His phone has been getting viruses and acting up lately. I just think he's probably been watching it. It would really bother me. Because I don't think he should need porn to jerk off. If he masturbates I don't have a problem with that but I do have one with him masturbating to other women. It's hurtful to me. The only thing I can say is that I don't think you should feel bad about yourself because it doesn't mean you aren't as beautiful or hot as before. I know pregnancy is a "beautiful" thing but honestly do you think having a big giant belly with a baby in it is erotic? I don't lol and I have one! When I had sex I had to cover my belly because it just made me feel weird to see it during sex. Its weird thinking that the baby is right there and to men it's probably even weirder. Maybe he is scared now that he's going to hurt the baby because you're 39 weeks? Either way I don't think watching porn is justified, but don't let it lower your self esteem. What did he say when you walked in on him btw?

[idanni]

Guys watch porn all time. My bf does. I ask him if he finishes he says no but he watches a fee videos so I'm sure he does.  He was very horny in beginning when  I didn't feel comfortable at first having sex, towards the end I got super horny. Now I can only finish him off orally and myself on top with difficulty as I am 37weeks but before when I would be able to lay on my side about 8weeks ago we would both finish sideways and at the end I would love to place his hand on my belly but he would quickly move it and grab my *** again. It didn't bother me I know he has a daddy side but guys when it's sex, it's sex they put sex first before food and all.  
I'm sorry for the girl that the guy started looking somewhere else that's not right. But your man is just looking at porn.
My guy freaks out at my belly or I know he feels a bit weird when I'm on top and he tells me so it's all about communication as well.
I'm a ftm but I look forward to working hard and loving/raising my baby but never neglect your man as well keep them happy and they keep you happy :)

[NeonPops]

I can tell you right now, you're being too hard on yourself and letting hormones take control. I have NEVER ever felt good about how I looked, and past boyfriends added to that by calling me names like fat ***, when I was 150 at 5'6". But my current boyfriend who is the father to my baby, compliments me non-stop and loves my body. He tells me everyday. When I was pregnant, it was even worse! He couldn't keep his hands off me, and I for once believe the man I'm with and feel comfortable. I just had my baby six days ago, and after having seen me open during an emergency c section, he is still ready and begging for sex and and now tells me motherhood looks good on me.

However... he loves porn. Like, a lot. His mind needs to be constantly stimulated, whether its games, cleaning, reading, or watching porn, he just needs something to do. Porn for him is more like something to do when he is bored. And even during sex, he has to have it on cause watching other people make love turns him on. Do I like it? Not really... I hate it. And I have talked to him several times about it. But he assures me that its just something to pass the time, and when he does masturbate, he never comes because its not me, and he honestly does have a hard time releasing cause his brain is going a mile a minute and he gets tired quickly.

Men jerk off just to jerk off. Its not because they find the women attractive, or because they find you less attractive, its just because they're bored, or horny and you're not, you're not around, or lazy at the time and dont wanna put any effort into it. Shoot, I've gone and masturbated when he was too tired, or when I was bored. In the end you two are still making love and still find each other unbelievably sexy, and you're not out having sex with other people.

Porn is sadly normal, and healthy, and you know what? Ask if h wants to watch some when you two are making love, cause it can be kinda hot and really spice up the night together. So dont you worry, he still finds you sexy! :)

[shaelouisebubba1]

I understand how you feel! As soon as I started showing my fiance looks at me less and less. I'll offer sex and try to be intimate with him only to be shrugged off. Usually a video game is more important than me. I recently found out he'd been talking to a girl online saying I never give him sex saying he'd had nothing for months when in reality it was a week tops. He was planning to have sex with her when I found out and its since destroyed any self confidence I was building about my body.. keep your head high girl.

[Huni_b]

I'm sorry to hear you feel that way. I think you're being too hard on yourself ... the more confident you are about your body the more it reflects on your character, and you shine from within.

I think every guy watches porn / self-services himself once in a while - with or without an attractive wife. I wudnt be too concern if I was u.

some evenings when my husband wants sex I'm either tired or just not in the mood. but the next morning when he leaves to work I feel super ho**y ... thats just how it is. and since I'm not giving him much, he admitted to **** off in the shower every now and then,  which I totally understand.

I'm sure there's no reason he shud suddenly not find you beautiful anymore. maybe take some time off on the weekend for some intimate togetherness  :-)