Divorce papers in hand..

[tattoomommy03]

I have the divorce papers in hand. My husband will be coming over to talk tonight. Where I will be laying down the law. I want to work thru this because I do love him
And he is good to me. Other than the fact the yard cheated on me with a icky stripper.. things wont  be there same. But I'm willing to try. For the kids if nothing else.. he will be tested for every std under the sun ( even those I have 2 that I was honest about)... he will sleep on the sofa and I will know where he is going. No more guys night. Unless its here. Man this is getting me ready for the teen years! Almost tempted to put a chip in his neck to track him down lol. So what do ya think? Am I stupid for considering a second chance?

[Majikat]

I don't think you should be getting back together with him you won't trust him... You can't take him back and then expect him to follow your rules like a child... I think u should just end it

[shellie409]

Its whatever you think you need to do but i know from my childhood that one of two things will happen: 1 you wont be able to trust him be constantly worried about what hes doing and your kids will start picking up that vibe and its not good to have tension in the house like that or 2 you'll feel this way for a while but cant help to still love him and want it to be the way it was like my mom did over and over :/ i hope he doesn't mess up again but he may feel that if hes already in the dog house and not getting what hes used to whats wrong with getting what hes missing from somewhere else? :(

[mckee513]

And as u said he filed. I don't think they can do it while tour pregnant but you can file. When my frienda divorce was final she was 3 wks away from her due date. They had tried therapy first that may have made a difference being they tried?

[mckee513]

I'm in Texas so was she but she did file in MI so it could be a state thing.

[searra]

Texas, my sister n law is here as well.

[Flickan]

Might be a state thing....what state are you in searra??

[searra]

Really? My exhusband and I were seperated for two years and he filed for devorce and they said even though we were seperated we had to try again til after I had my babies.
    My sister in law did the same thing and they wouldnt grant it to her as well. Maybe its different in every state. Idk

[mckee513]

I've seen the comment u can't divorce while pregnant many times on here. It's he can't divorce you. Trust me my bf divorced her husband and she was pregnant. He cheated she filed.

[searra]

By the way sweetie you cant devorced while your pregnant its not aloud. You have to wait regardless.

[tattoomommy03]

Wow... thank you all so much for your thoughts and advise! Its helped me see all sides of this. He came over and I told him to go to counciland show me proof and to do everything to earn my trust. He will be staying at folks house ( poor badtard) so I'm sure my dad will keep me updated on his movement. Hhe agreed to the std test once its time. I am filling the paper work out as we speak. I doubt his trust and words. Im a fighter for sure. So we will see what happens. I asked how far he went with her and he said just a ********.. don't believe it,  not at all....

[crstl11]

Yeah the trust thing is a big issue here to. I have bad trust issues and it has been nearly two years in June. What makes it worse is the girl is a ex girlfriend and a friend of his dads family. Her dad lives next door to his dad so she will always be around and this is the second time they have done this once before we got married as well.

[katngary143]

Thats a tough road momma but u have to do what makes u happy and what is best for u and the little ones ....temptation is always around the corner and trust needs to be earned back the hard part is def trusting him and not second guessing everything he is doing bc that will eat u alive...its a long and hard road giddy up sister

[missymay34]

My hubby and I almost divorced back in August but to be honest we are back together and happier than ever. He is such a great dad and living husband. We all have our downfalls we can choose to move on or not. No one can make that choice for you.

[searra]

I can tell you one thing, its going to take alot out of you not to rezent (sorry for my spelling) him. You pretty much have to train your mind not to want to kill him all the time, and trust me its hard. I still havent figured it out all the way. even when im happy im still bitter to my husband. But some women are alot stronger. I would really try marriage conciling.

[mckee513]

Wow you women put up w more than I ever would. How do you even trust these men again???? And the line I stay for my kids is a bad one. If it was your daughter would you want her treated like that and lied too? I would want better for myself and my kids

[crstl11]

If u love him then go for it. If not then u may be wasting ur time. My husband can be a plain jerk and most of the time doesn't deserve me but I stay here for my kids so I can't judge u either way. He never slept with another women but he talked to one on facebook behind my back and sent her pic and she did the same and then we drew up papers to get divorced and called a lawyer to meet with. Then I caught up with him and found he txted her over 800 times in 4 days and called her then he decided he wanted me...

[New Mommy 2 Be 2007]

Best of luck to your marriage

[New Mommy 2 Be 2007]

If you can leave with it that it fine, but that fact that he slept with a Stipper! And could of god for bid got an disease and past it to you and not care your pregnant I wouldn't be able to get thru it! I'd throw him out and get a divorce, I mean yes their are the kids, I get fed up and to cheat is hard and the guilt is probably worst so I'm not sure what else to tell you, you two are married not dating. It's a hard choice but if you can handle it then try to work at your marriage, it's all on you

[tomorrow264]

I think you are making a good decision. If you try to make it work and it doesn't you can still divorce him later. I hope the talk goes well and he's willing to do what needs to be done so you can try to move forward.

[emmaftm]

I think ur choice is up to u, my bf has had loads of chances... seriously to the point where im searching for the MUG tattoo on my forehead!! U sound like a strong woman and i wish u all the best... (send some of that strength my way ;) lol)

[Flickan]

I think if this is the choice you made, than this is the right choice.  Hope the talk goes well.

[jwilliams81]

I have given my hubby more chances than he probably deserves.  He has never done what yours did, and most everything he has done was before we were married.  I just tell myself this-I know him, I do have feelings for him, and I can honestly say I want to try.  He is not perfect, I am not perfect, and if I chose to move on the next guy would not be perfect either.  I don't want to start my life over trying to fix yet another dirt bag's bad habits, so I stick with the one I have chosen and make it work the best I can.  If he does something I cannot live with, then the line will be drawn and I will have plently of reasons to fall back on.  If YOU can live with it and let it go, then it is worth it.  If you cannot get past what was done, then nothing will ever make it work.  Good luck sweetie <3

[carmarie25]

I think in life we all make really stupid mistakes that we can never take back i think its good of you to try it wont cause any harm and at least if u give him a second chance it wont be a "what if game" as to just shunting him out and not giving him the chance to redeem himself! And i tjink your rules r great u gotta do what ya gotta do for you and ur kids and hey if he doesnt agree or makes another mistake at least u can always say you tried your best!!! Good luck hun and i wish u all the best!!!

[mckee513]

It's your choice mama. Do what you feel is right. I wouldn't but that's just me. Only because I could never fully trust him again. It wouldn't be fair to me or him. Staying for the kids is never a reason to me. Kids would rather be from a broken home then live in a broken home. This is only my opinion. You do what is right for you