can't take it

[genamarie]

I'm really upset. My relationship just ended Saturday night as I got upset and my pregnancy hormones went rampant. I said some things more or less that I regretted the moment I said them, including that I wanted to end things, which I didn't, who knows why I'd say that. Anyway, he hasn't spoken to me since, no matter how many times I've tried calling or texting, I'm left with no response. Each day that passes something more is done that shows that he's over me, and not coming back.

Basically, I'm freaking out as I'm 32 weeks and 5 days, and I've just lost the only support and love I've had throughout my whole pregnancy, aside from some of the caring women I've met here. My heart is broken, and I'm scared he won't come back to be there when the baby is born (which I'm experiencing preterm labor, and being 100% effaced, no measurable cervical length, and almost 2 cm dilated, they speculate it will probably be sooner than the due date).

Have you ever said something you didn't mean that someone blew way out of proportion over? I wish I could repeat the night over again. Why did I get so upset? Had I not said what I said, he would have been here early the next day, and we'd still be together.

All I want to do is cry, and sleep. I'm worried I'll more than likely end up with postpartum depression on top of all of this.

[2ndbaby162]

Give him time. If he really meant what he said then he'll come back to you. I know its tough but you have to focus on you and baby. You may find that this relationship has upset you more because of the security you felt with having the baby without the dad needing to be there. You can do this on your own if you have to. He doesn't need to be there to make you capable of loving and raising your child. Stay strong hun. He'll be back if it was meant to be. Best wishes xx

[genamarie]

Thanks for all the kind words of encouragement everyone. But as I see it, he's not coming back. I didn't try to talk to him at all today, and yesterday I tried my best to not attempt it but I believe I might have contacted him out of anxiousness while feeling cramps and contractions for about an hour and worried I'd have to go back to the hospital I called him with no answer and told him I was scared and to please call me. Had he not been someone I still love and care for, and not been on the call list at the hospital for when I'm in labor if I were to come in and go to deliver they'd call him to let him know so he didn't miss it as he has said since he's been around that he wanted to be there with me when I delivered. Well I got no answer, never got a response, nothing. Today was the fourth of July, not even a happy fourth of July from him. And I know this is extra immature to stress over but it just adds to what I believe is the end of us because he deleted anything pertaining to me on his facebook. Which we've broken up before and he hasn't done although he's done this petty silent treatment stuff before when we broke up. I'm glad he is not the biological father of the baby, as he came onto my life (knowing day one I was pregnant) in the very beginning of my pregnancy. As we've been together the whole time, he's grown attached to me and the baby (so he said) and planned to get me a ring, get engaged, get a house together, get married, and later down the line try to have a baby together that would biologically be his (throwing out a rough time frame of 5 years on the baby if I wanted to try it again with how many complications I've had with my current pregnancy, but who'd have thought none of it meant anything to him?) My heart is broken. Funny how I wasn't even this heart broken over the man who got me pregnant and left me to fend for myself after telling me to go to hell knowing I was pregnant. I don't really know what to do now. I want to try to contact him again, but what would be too soon? Or should I try to "get over it" as I'm not too sure I ever will seeing as this felt like he was the one I'd spend my life with. apparently everything was just too perfect to be real. I wish things didn't end up this way. I've done nothing but cry every day. Thanks again everyone. I wish you all were right.

[mrselmore1206]

If he wanted to be there he would be there hun. I drive my hubby nuts and say some nutty things but he stays cause he wants to and knows ita just the hormones. Ill pray for u just take care of u and baby men come and go

[sharichajewski]

Aww im really sorry hun this is the last thing u need right now. You need tofocus on baby and staying healthy. Youve been.so strong all along and have kept that baby in this long so keep.fighting. He may just need some time and space to think things through. Just remember that its not just you he would be walking away from its also his baby and im sure he will come around and realize that. Just stay positive thibgs always work out one way or another. If he has anyone close to him whose ever been pregnant im sure they will make him understand that we all say and do things we dont mean when we have 100x the hormones and emotions running through us. Keep your chin up and smile you have lots of support right here an these ladies will always be here for you:)

[thirdtimemum]

You need now to leave it in his hands, youd be surprised at what time and a little space can do.... You cant be stressing now, you have a little baby that needs to be cooking in there a little longer, and that is the most important thing right now. Dont let others immaturity wreck your pregnancy or state of mind, and i know it must be hard for you right now, especially when you have alot of time on your hands to sit there and think. Just remember, what will be, will be, and we cannot change what has already happened. Start dreaming about the arrival of your new bub, and maybe concentrate on getting things ready for him/her and in the meantime maybe your boyfriend will of had time to calm down and come round.

[genamarie]

Thanks so much everyone. I wish this all never happened. I can't understand why he did this. Why he hasn't talked to me since Saturday night the second I said I was done, even though I didn't mean it, and on top of it apologized right after and every day aside from yesterday but got no response. Today is now Wednesday. And then tomorrow is the fourth of July. I'm really upset. I've tried so hard. With no answer whatsoever. I've tried not to attempt contacting him today, and I tried so hard yesterday but last night I noticed his best friend and mutual friend of ours deleted me on facebook and It's just making it all too real that he won't be coming back. I know it sounds stupid and ridiculous, but the immaturity of these guys is insane. My boyfriend was a year older than I am and his friend is two years older. You'd think throwing a tantrum and changing everything completely and not speaking to me for a week would be something a kid would do. I'm hurt, upset, and annoyed.