Finally got to the real reason...

[Jenn28815]

So my fiance told me a while back he wasn't going to be in the delivery room with me when our son is born because he couldn't.  He originally said he couldn't see me go through that kind of pain and couldn't see the blood. Well, today he finally told me what he was truly afraid of...he's scared because of the possibility of me not surviving the delivery. Unfortunately,  he's the type that pictures worse case scenario, and his mind runs with it. I have tried reassuring him that it will be fine, but he's still scared. I think more so than I am. Im more nervous than scared really. Im a little concerned about what would happen if my blood pressure drops from the fluid/blood loss, but aside from that, it's nervousness about the unknown. How much it's going to hurt...etc...

[Jenn28815]

If he isn't going to be in there with me, I'm going to be flying solo because there is no one else. Ive kinda come to terms with it. A little disappointed,  but it's his choice too. I guess we will see what happens when the time comes. He's got a few weeks before he has to make the final decision anyways...

[kris_1986]

My husband was the same with our first but he was there holding my hand through the whole thing. he was terrified of losing me but at the end decided he'd rather be with me if something did happen

[schenner2]

Not that it would happen but How would he feel if he was in the waiting room if something did go wrong? Wouldnt he want to be with you and be there for you? Let him know it is normal to have fears and that you too are scared and you need him to be stong and to support you in one of the most difficult and rewarding things you will ever do. Hopefully he will come around.  I too think he will regret it.

[sofygrafe]

My bf always think the worse too. But this delivery needs to be appreciated from you first and formost. He could stand close to the room and having your mother or a close friend with you instead. It can b disapointing for you, but think how much stress youll have that day, so you need not worry and plan those kind of reactions.it is respect for him, and respect for urself.

[TheeMothership]

I'm the same way he is!! Lol, give it to him this way... If the worst thing were to happen and you die, can he live with not being there for you in your last moments? The odds of that actually happening are so slim but for someone who lives off worse case scenario that should give him something new to think about. Meanwhile I'm trying to talk my hubby into cutting the cord! Good luck!!

[Jenn28815]

Hr doesn't have many friends to begin with and none (that I'm aware of) that have been through a child birth. I'm going in with the intention of having a natural unmedicated birth,  but with the realization that there may be a point when enough is enough. So I'm just going to put it in the birth plan that I dont wish to be offered pain medications. I will ask for them if I get to the point of wanting it. Like I said, I'm slightly nervous, but not what I would consider to be unreasonably so. Just one of those things that sits in the back of my mind since it's getting closer now.

[mummy19861]

It will hurt. How much....? Depends on every individual. With every pain your body is doing something and you just stay focused and remember to breath and in the end you will get through it promise. There any many forms of pain  relief, which is good to read up on.

Maybe watch a few videos on birth and some videos on different methods of pain relief... sit your fiance down too, lol

[danahenley]

Im sure everything will be fine and if he misses it he might regret it. Does he have a guy friend that's been through a delivery that he can talk to. I think he'll really enjoy watching it and holding his baby for the first time