Freaking out!!

[degriffdog]

So I am just barely pregnant.  This was unexpected. The only time we had unprotected sex was when I was on my period. Other than that it's condoms.  So I feel guilty for getting pregnant when we weren't trying, but I feel guilty for not being happy at all about it.

So I need to know from women who have experienced this, what should I do to not feel guilty or happy about being pregnant.  Thanks.

[tasha603]

Things happen for a reason.  Im 9 wks and me and my boyfriend just ended our relationship and he doesn't want the baby but just stay positive about the pregnancy and things will change. Im now going to be a single mom of 2.

[degriffdog]

Thanks girls. I'm sure ill get over it. But number 5 is huge lol. And I probably do feel a little guilty for my almost 2 yr old who I was planning on being my baby. :/ I'm trying to wrap my head around. I love being pregnant.  I'm just shocked!!

[xiler84z]

I planned to get pregnant and I still feel that way some days. I think it is a very normal feeling.

[Korenynthia]

This is my second pregnancy unplanned. And I agree, it is normal to feel guilty like "oh my word! How could I let this happen " I got pregnant with my daughter 6 wks after h.s. graduation. I was going to college, I was living on my own I was an 'adult'. I basically was in denial until I found out the sex. I still took care of myself,  and didnt do anything stupid. But I was feeling guilty, anger and disbelief. The moment I saw her on the ultra sound I realized what is meant to be, will be. And I agree with when u try, it doesn't happen the way u want it to. We tried for 11months for my son. I got pregnant, miscarried at 4 wks 5days. Got pregnant with my son 5 weeks later,  totally not trying. Then we were 'done'. Fiancee was gonna get a vasectomy and bam aug 2, find out we are prego with baby #3. Life happens, its okay to be in shock, and feel guilty. But obviously it was meant to happen.  The happiness and excitement will come!! :)

[teabugsmommy]

Hormones are a crazy thing!! My situation was totally different....... My husband and I decided we wanted another baby, I went off birth control and it took us 6 months of trying before I got pregnant. I wanted it right!? I found out and I was almost devastated!! I felt guilty for my 2 year old!! I felt horrible for doing that to him. Part way through my pregnancy I started being happy and then toward the end the guilt came back again. The minute my new little man was born I was in love!! And my 2.year old is the greatest big brother in the world!! It does get better!! Don't feel bad for not being happy, it will come!!

[aimeejo88]

Its actually normal for you to feel this way. I was 18 had my life going, and was partying ya know living the "high life". I was friends with benefits with my daughters donor for a few months and then we got pregnant right after we started dating. I cried and was mad at myself for not being careful. Time is the only thing that can change you. My daughter is now 6 and I don't know where I'd be if God hadn't stepped in my life and gave me her. Truly I was going down a bad path for a kid

[arlandonbloom]

I definitely was uneasy about the situation when I found out. I kept making up excuses for my period being late, but at my first appointment when I heard the heartbeat and saw the ultrasound, I became the happiest person alive. They say that when you don't try for a baby is when you're more than likely to have one, and I know a bunch of people who got pregnant on BC and condoms so when they say it's 99% effective, they probably leave out the people who it didn't work for (haha jk, but really). You will get excited with time.

[sillyLizzygirl]

I understand completely. I started dating a guy and we used condims, never unprotected sex, and I have PCOS which makes getting pregnant really difficult. So when I missed my period I didn't think much of it (the PCOS I don't always have a period) then he mentioned it off handedly (was getting ready to deploy) and I was like no...impossible. I tested and went into shock. I didn't start getting happy about being pregnant until I felt him kick the first time. (Guy and I broke up, long sad story involving him being married and me being a fling) once I started getting over the sadness that surrounded it I started feeling joy. I'm 32 weeks now and still elated. Met the man of my dreams and we're building a life together. Good luck to you honey, it will come, the happiness I mean.

[shastas84]

It's not uncommon to feel like OMG! I got pregnant?! It's ok to be unsure of your feelings when you first find out. Now to help with getting over the initial shock. Like havincinco pointed out.. focus on the positive aspects. When you are ready to announce this to people, start with the ones that will be the most supportive. Enjoy the pregnancy moments. And always feel free to jump on here and talk to us.  :) congrats on the wonderful news. :)

[havincinco]

Maybe change the way you think about the situation. Like, "holy crap! I got pregnant at the rarest time possible!" There must be some awesome reason for it that you just dont know yet. Ive had two of those pregnancies. They werent planned, but against all odds became the bright shining light I needed later on for onereason or another...my saving grace, so to speak. For now, just breathe and take it for what it is...dont feel guilty. The happiness will come in time.