any helpful advice

[momma_pearl]

me and the father of my child really aren't on talking terms at the moment because he's stubborn and wanna act like a little boy right now I guess and not once has he checked to see how I'm doing nor the baby every since I told him how everything's been going lately with my pregnancy which isn't as good as I hoped...we've known each other a little over five years and I've not met anyone in his family, but since I'm pregnant now I want his mom to know that she has another grandchild on the way (remind you I'm due next month) I've asked him has he told her and he said yes and then I asked how she responded to it and he was like she didn't say anything and I was lost for words...she has a Facebook page and I wanted to know if I should befriend her and let her know myself or should I just leave it how it is...I just don't want my kid growing up like I did which was without a father (we stay in the same town) and not knowing that side of the family or being scared to go visit or spend time with them because he doesn't know them

[EllaMari]

That is what the courts are for, have them sort out paternity and visitation. Keep it above board and civil. Be patient and calm so no one can accuse you of being anything but. You'll win people over faster that way. The last thing you need is to be misjudged as crazy or manipulative. It's hard,  sometimes impossible to come back from a bad first impression. Even when you're coming from a good place.

[momma_pearl]

That's what I was also worried about, but I don't want my son to just pop up out of the blue and they deny him

[EllaMari]

Tread lightly. I've seen this backfire horribly and make the father cut ties entirely. It is his family and your actions may be taken the wrong way. Try talking to him first about your concerns and ask for the best way to get to know his family. Let him feel like he's in control. If you do something without talking to him first he might feel you were being sneaky and it could hurt the trust between you. I wish you luck,  this isn't easy and I hope it works out well!

[thepenguinsrock]

I agree i grew up with a dad who was hardly ever around and when me and my Bro did visit him or any relatives from that side of family we always feel like unwanted intruders, they are strangers to us even our half sis is. I think you should contact the mother and at least give her the chance to be part of your babies life even if her son isn't that interested. But if she really doesn't want to be involved then at least you tried to do the best for your baby and no one can say different :)

[momma_pearl]

Thanks for the advice (: now I feel much better

[newluv]

I would contact his mom. Just so she knows that you arent excludung her or isolating your baby from their family. Despite him being a jackass..... his family may not be. Every child deserves to know both sides of their family regardless if the man is there or not. But do not get too disappointed if she does not react the way you want. Reach out to her for your baby...if you get no love or response...keep it moving.