Worried I am a Possable father

[worriedguy4444]

I am not sure if is the right area for this but would prefer some impartial advice and honest opinions.  Basically I had one off sex with a women a while back (22nd May).  I used a condom and it did not break.  She later told me she is pregnant and I am the father.  My immediate thought was ********, no way, she is lieing.  Of course I was freaked out though.  Then I began to panic as I remembered I left my sperm filled condom at her place where she would have had access to it, I left not long after the deed. It was a non spermicidal condom although contained extra lube.  I would like to ask any medical people here, how likeley is it someone can get pregnant in this way? self inseminating from a used condom on one occasion?

Basically this women is nuts and has admitted having mental problems in the past, I do not trust her at all, I think she is pregnant as she has scan pics etc but no way do I believe it is mine.  There are a number of things she has said/done that are very dubious.  For instance she let slip she is due in January, considering we had sex on May 22nd she should be due on february 12th so that is suspect.  Also I only seen her scan pics briefly but one was dated from June, which seems a bit early.  She also text me she is due to have a boy after being rushed to hospital 'with pain' and they scanned her, yet she put on her profile 'cannot wait to have my girl'.  There are also loads of other suspect stuff that would take too long to explain(like when I first denied absolutely that it could be mine and she stated 'well it does not matter who the father is I will be bringing it up by myself') since she has claimed it is definateley mine..  All logic tells me she is lying about me being the father but I cannot help but worry, what do you guys think?

[mom2ariana]

if you used a condom i highly doubt it; i also highly doubt you can become pregnant by using a used condom. i do not know for sure. but i have heard sperm doesn't live very long in air. i am thinking you would have had to leave immediately after sex for there to even be the slightest possibility.
id say take a paternity test. it's also possible to have one done while pregnant through an amniocentesis. she would have to be (i think) 16-20 something weeks along for that to be possible, and there are risks. go with her to her next appointment and talk to her doctor about the options.
in the meantime, don't have sex with women that have mental problems ;)

[julianovak]

ONLY a paternity test will let you know. She can tell you whatever she wants to, and you can believe whatever you want. But only a DNA test will put your mind to ease.

[tarajanes]

Definately ask to go doctors with her next time,are you sure the scan picture is hers.ive known many of women that have used other people scan pics.somthing to think about.

[worriedguy4444]

Thanks for the replies, I know the only way to be certain is with a dna test, just wanted peoples opinions.  She said the doctor said she is pregnant so many weeks (eg so it mtaches for when we had sex plus the two weeks from when it would be measured from).  That is why when she let slip the January thing it did not make sense.

[tarajanes]

I agree a paternity test is your best option,if you ovulated around 22nd.14 days before her period.her period wouldnt nessasarily been the 8th.since she may have longer cycles.scans can be off by few days maybe longer.

[vacuumprincess]

well, this is certanially a lot to take in.  Generally women ovulate about 2 weeks before their next schedulled peroid.  IF you had sex during her ovulation peroid it is possible for her to be pregnant.  Condoms do fail, although somewhat unlikely.  Abstanance is the only foolproof birth control.  Back to ovulation...  If say she ovulated around may 22, her last peroid would have been May 8th.  add 40 weeks to may 8th and that is her ESTIMATED due date.  I come up with Feb 12th.  Scans CAN be off on due dates by a few weeks.  Mine changed a few times.  
    Some women get a scan done right away.  So it is very possible to have seen one dated "June".  It would have been somewhat tadpole looking.
    All this being said, unfortunately there is only one way for YOU to be for sure if the child is yours.  A dna test.  You can order for one to be done.  I think they are rather expensive, but of course cheaper than paying support for a child that isn't yours.  
    

[shishka]

Why don't you got to her appointment with her and try to get more info from her doctor. I think best way for you to know will be the paternity test after baby is born.

Good luck

[Cassandrajane]

Due dates can change...
Theyy might have done an early pregnancy scan, if she said she didnt know when her last period was, many docs do this... if you blag up you cant remember when your last period was therefore dont know how far gone you are.

Wait untill the baby is born and get a paternity test, Only answer really.