Picky Eater Question

[njrohe]

My son is almost 21 months old and only eats bananas, chicken nuggets and peanut butter and jelly sandwiches (and basically any type of sweets/chips/etc).  He will still eat any type of baby food.  He is still pre-verbal so bribery and reason are still out of the question.  I tried letting him eat with his little friends so he would see them eating veggies and rice, but he remains unconvinced (at least he's not a follower).  The worst part is that he won't even TRY the other foods.

Anyway, I'm at the point where I am considering refusing to give him anything he knows he likes until out of hunger he will try something new, but I am concerned about this, too.  How long should I let him go without before I say "uncle"?  Any thoughts or advice from other parents of picky or formerly picky eaters?

[New Mommy 2 Be 2007]

One more thing give him a toy to play with that he could put in his mouth, thats what i do with my son, as long as he even holds a spoon, which he loves holding when he eats lol, he will eat his whole meal! but when it falls or he doesnt he have it he doesnt open his mouth, weird

[New Mommy 2 Be 2007]

in my world i think noone goes what i go through with my son! carmine is 13 months old. He never liked the freakin bottle, never! he hated the formula from day one! He refuse to drink it after i say 6-7 months and i had to push it in  his mouth in his sleep, now im screwed because now he wants the bottle at night,he loves whole milk now! he doesnt he a lot at all, he eats maybe half of a waffle for breakfeast or ceral a little bit,then he will have 6 oz milk before or after, then a nap with a bottle, then for lunch speggettios or veggies, then juice throughout the day.
for dinner whatever we eat, then i will give him more of it or veggies before bedtime. then another bottle.
sometimes he doesnt barley eat anything. he pushes my hand away. two months ago i think he didnt eat a drop of food, he was very bad and it drives me nutz.
but if i order pizza or eat chicken nuggets he will for sure eat it lol, just keep giving him different foods. try speggettios! broiled chicken instead of chicken nuggets

boil him carrrots and put butter and salt in it
broccoli with chesse (my son's fav.)
mashed potatoes
ceral like cherrois or something anything!

trust me if i got my son to eat, you could do it too. Carmine wouldnt eat a crum! not even baby food he stop at 11 months!

[Avanaar]

"Battling" with children to show them that they are not the ones in charge is one of the hardest things you have to do as a parent.  But showing consistency and not giving in *does* work!!  

Yes, he will get cranky if he doesn't eat ... but you're not starving him.  You are giving him food and he is *choosing* not to eat it!  And when it's all said and done, he will learn that there is a lot more yummy food out there than just bananas and chicken nuggets!!

[AHP84]

Don't worry, my son went through this stage right around 13-14 months old, and I offered him food he refused to eat for lunch and dinner.
For two days straight, the ONLY time he ate was at breakfast, when I'd give him a granola bar or a bowl of oatmeal and a banana. He'd get really cranky at lunch and by dinner, he'd pretty much have a tantrum until bedtime. It was awful, but I didn't give up.
After two days, he ate anything I put in front of him. He occasionally has picky moments even now that he's four years old, but he will always try something if I ask, and he will eat when he's hungry, although if he doesn't approve of the meal he doesn't hold back in letting me know about it! But at least he eats.
You'll get through this with your son, and he will too. Just be ready for one of the biggest battle of wills you'll ever face!

[njrohe]

Update on Luke's eating...

This morning I offered him pineapple for breakfast.  Pineapple by itself isn't much but I anticipated that he wouldn't eat it and I didn't want to needlessly waste food.  He sat and poked at it and looked at it but didn't eat it.  After a half-hour, I let him out, figuring that a full hour is a very long time for a child under two to be cooped up three times per day.  I left the pineapple available, but he never ate it....

For lunch, I gave him beef nibblets with egg noodles.  I also laid out some pineapple that I figured hadn't yet gone bad.  He poked at the egg noodles.  Still did not eat.  Thankfully, he has had a good attitude so far which is making it easier on me!  So, once again, I let him out and kept the food available, but nothing...

So, now he's napping.  When he wakes I'll try again.  My big fear is that he will go a long time without taking even a bite -- like three days or more.  But I'm hanging in.  If any of you are praying people, please pray that my son would eat and that I would stay strong for him.

[Avanaar]

I'm not a mother yet, but I am of the mind that your child should not dictate everything they eat (especially if it's unbalanced).  

I worked at a preschool for 2.5 years and the one-year olds would eat the same things the 2's, 3's and 4's ate for lunch ... the main course (usually something like mac & cheese w/ hamburgers, sandwiches, etc), a fruit, and a veggie.  Yes, there were some that would eat only one thing, but they were never allowed to get seconds of that one thing unless they at least *tried* something else.

Like Kate said on Jon & Kate Plus 8 ... children are not going to starve themselves.  They will eat when they are hungry ... and they will eat what you give them.  If they know they can throw a fit and you'll cave in and give them bananas and chicken nuggets, then that's what they'll do every time you feed them.

Someone mentioned giving your child a choice.  That could work ...but it also may backfire.  It's going to be a tough road either way ... but you have to remember to hold your ground and be consistent.  Do NOT give in to the temper tantrums.  A child will not starve him/herself!!  

[Tracy21]

hi im in the same situation with my daughter she is also 21 mths and sh is really bd with her earting and her talking its seems al she wants is sweet things and refused t eat anything healthy but i got that fe up with her taken tantrums because she couldnt get what she wanted i refused i stopped all her sweets i put healthy food infront of her and she refused to eat it but once she realise i wasnt going to give in she started eating healthy food and with the talking i am oing through the same thing my daughter was saying alot of words like get out, im not, mummy, daddy and his brothers name derek and alot more words the all of a sudden she stopped she says the odd word but nothing to what she was saying before i just hope she starts talking soon she will be 2 in feb and im due my next baby in april and it would be great if she could talk so i dont have to guess what she needs

[njrohe]

It's kind of a weird situation with his talking.  He was saying about 20 words when he hit 12 months, but then when he learned to walk, he started communicating through pointing and/or guiding me to what he wanted and the talking all but stopped.  He still occasionally will say something, but then not again.  For example, I've heard him say phrases like "here you go" "let's go" "all done" etc.  clear as day, but then never say them again and months go by.  I mentioned all this to his doc and the response was, "don't worry, by age 2 he'll be talking up a storm" and "little boys don't have much use for words" so hopefully within a couple of months that will change.  Otherwise, I'll be bringing it up at his next visit, but I'm trying to be patient as several of the boys in my family did not speak until they were two and now speak very well and are even the brightest in their class.

[g8r grl]

My son is a "picky eater," but it's related to his sensory impairment and speech delays.

You said that your son is 21 months old and "pre-verbal." Does he speak at all? He should be saying at least single words by now...around 50+. If he is not speaking, then his food issues could be tied into his picky eating.

My son will eat grapes one day, not like them the next, then eat them again the day after...aagghhh! It's always a guessing game with him so I send 6 different foods to school everyday.

[ashiepooh]

I didn't read the other posts, but he isn't exactly a picky eater!  When they are under 5 they have a preference for foods they like!  As long as you try to give him something else first, and you yourself take a bit of the food that you want him to try, he will eventually eat it!  

But I wouldn't give him milk, or juice or water before he eats, that way he is for sure hungry!  When my kids were 9 to 10 months old, is when my doctor okayed normal food.

So we started with rice, corn and peas which he told us to smash, so they wouldn't choke, and other small foods.  Needless to say there isn't anything my kids wont eat.  Well except what their allergic to and cake and treats, they refuse to eat them!  

Even your doctor would likely agree, as long as he is eating something that isn't just sweets, he is doing good!  The fact that he is eating banana's is awesome!  Maybe don't offer chips, cookies etc.  When my kids have something new on their plate, it takes them to watch both my husband and I to eat it first before they will eat it.  Like taking a bite of their food which is on their plate.  Maybe try that!

Good Luck, and eventually he will move on to something else.  It's just a prefered taste of food he likes

[GRose]

My son is also a picky eater, he is almost 2. I give him his meal and he has no choice, if he doesn't eat it within an hour I take him out of his chair and he can wait until the next meal. I know that sounds harsh but I don't want him to think that he is going to get away with not eating what is put in front of him. If he starts motioning for more food I will give him the option to eat the meal that he didn't finish earlier, not a new meal.

[Mumita]

milk and jouice will keep him from getting uhngry for an hour at most.  He wont go a week without eating, he will eat something, just don't give in.  He's at an age when he's testing you and BTW a 22 month old understands waaaaayyy more than you think never underestimate the mental capacity of a todler.

[Darkestlight]

i am battling the same thing with my 15 month old. except shes not exactly picky... there are foods she loves but she just doesnt want to eat at times no matter what i offer her.

[njrohe]

How long did it take for your son to eat something new?  

I have decided to try the two choices idea, but I am wondering, for example, should I be prepared for him to go three or more days without eating anything?  Also, how do you work it with the milk and juice as I don't want him to go longer without food because he is able to keep hunger at bay with milk and juice, so how much milk and juice do you allow them to have while they are resisting food?

[bryanarae]

I don't want to sound mean, but I went through this with my son. It started at a year and a half when he was able to eat anything we wanted to give him. He would also only eat bananas, peanut butter, toast, you know typical kid stuff. Finally I got sick and tired of it. I went to my doctor and he said, "The kid won't starve himself to death. Maybe a week of yelling and screaming, but that's the worst of it!" So I started only giving him 2 options. Both which were foods he wouldn't normally eat. I believe in giving choices, then they feel they have some sort of control over it. So I would offer him rice or corn sort of a deal. He never starved himself, it just took him longer to eat. But I agree with the previous poster, gotta break the habit quickly or it will get even worse. Now that my son is older, my hubby and I give him his lunch or dinner, and he has an hour to eat whats on his plate, if he doesn't eat it, he gets nothing else. Of course he is 3 and understands that. But I would start dealing with it now, don't wait, and don't offer him foods you know he likes. Especially once you've started!
Good luck and best wishes with the picky eater syndrome... it aint an easy one!

[LauraB78]

I don't know how to say this without sounding just mean, so I will just say it....


Your son ONLY eats that and refuses to eat anything else because YOU let him get away with it.. You obviously succomb to his dietary woes, so he will continue to act like a food brat as long as you let him.. My sister had the same problem with her eldest.. It is REALLY hard to break the habit, but pending that your child has no allergies, or other like disabilities, he is likely just spoiled and you need to make him change his diet habits.. He wont starve.. OF COURSE, talk to your pediatrician first for pointers, and good luck..

Again, I am sorry I couldnt find a way to put my opinion more delicately, but it is just my opinion..