Too affraid to take Cole anywhere

[ammanda]

Okay I live in a really small town, actually its really called a village.  IM ABSOLUTELY TERRIFIED TO DRIVE ANYMORE!!! I'm soo scared for the safety of my son.  

A few months ago, there were these 3 teenagers, that had left school at lunch, and went to go get high.  very careless teenagers. well they were going about 90 on a main road that just entered a new town so the speed limit was 45! they were freaking going 90!  well they crashed there car into an old lady, and killed her instantly, the sad part is she was a good friend of mines mother! He is the lieutenant at the jail. And he was a great man, his mother was a wonderful lady, it was around 11 in the morning and she was on her way to see her husband in the hospital who is really sick. and was killed instantly because of the stupid careless teenagers.  and what really gets me is, the kid who was driving never got in trouble, he just got a slap on the wrist.  maybe some probation,  how do you kill and innocent old lady from reckless driving and not get in trouble? what is wrong with this world?  

Okay and then just last week, three more teenagers caused and accident from reckless driving, all from the town I live in.  These kids were only 15, didn't know how to drive didn't have a license, was speeding down a gravel road, not knowing how to drive and lost control of the car and hit a tree.  2 of those kids died, one instantly and the one that was driving died a few hours after arriving at the hospital, and the girl is in a coma.  

I'm so terrified to have my son out in my own home town, i have lived here for almost 10 years and this has never happened in this town and now there's 2 in a few month span.  If anything happened to my son cause of a careless teenager, i would just freaking die. what am i supposed to do, i cant keep my son locked in the house all the time.  

[JoyRenee]

I'm with Tabitha- if I cross a bridge over water I will get a game plan in my head of how to get ALL three of my kids out if the bridge were to crash into the water.

We have high speed chases here all the time. One of the more recent ones someone was going the opposite way on the Interstate. It is everywhere and I just make sure I'm really conscious about EVERYTHING around me when driving.

We can't control what other people around us are doing. But we also can't be hermits and close ourselves off from the world. I have a really hard time driving on highways or going to unfamiliar places, especially if my kids are in the car (I don't have a problem with it if they are not with me). They are your babies and you want to do everything you can to protect them. But at the same time putting them in a bubble does just as much damage.

So sad the kid only got a slap on the wrist. He should've gotten first degree murder AND driving while under the influence not to mention skipping school and whatever else they did.

[blueeyedtabbycat]

I realy hope you didnt take that the wrong way.........

[blueeyedtabbycat]

I can totaly relate to how you feel. After my 4th baby was born I was have anxiety attacks about everything that could happen. Driving acrosse a bridge that had fallen in 07 during rush hour was the worse. I would constanly think about what if that happened while I was driving with all my kids. Could I save them??? Little things, big things, you name it I worried. I talked with my doctor and found out alot of it had to do with PPD. I was on meds for a short time but man did they help alot. Anxiety over the health of our LO's is normal but when it interfers with everyday life you should seek some help:~) Not saying your nutz, lol. But that we cant stop life:~) Crazy how we never think things will happen to us just other people, but those other people are like us too, thining it will never happen to them. And small towns??? They are supposed to be safe right??? I hope you can try and relax and the problems your town is having with the teenagers will get better:~)
((HUGS))
Tabitha

[ammanda]

I have been driving for a few years now.  and im not the best driver, but when my son is in my car, im constantly looking everywhere. but you know anything can happen, whether its ur fault or not.  especially at night on the weekends is when I hate driving the most.  ugh its just so frightning, u never know whats gonna happen, it happens so quick. like u wake up get ready to go somewhere, and because of a careless driver u end up dying by the end of that day. its so scary.  like i think about it everytime im getting me and Cole ready to go some where.  its like omg are we gonna be okay? are we gonna return home tonight?  its so nerve wrecking

[BTS1022]

I think that's completely normal, at least from my experience. When I had Aiden my now 4 yr old I was living back home in MI with my father as my husband at the time was deployed to iraq. Well I was terrified in the beginning to take him anywhere...especially alone. I think I was scared more or less because I didn't know what I would do if I were stuck in traffic or at a red light and he needed to eat or be changed. Aiden is my 3rd child, and I was baffled and annoyed at the feeling of being scared taking my son anywhere.

I think maybe taking baby steps would be a good way to start, maybe a drive around the block at first, or take a friend with you to help ease and maybe slightly distract you from your fear. That's what I had to do. I started taxi'ing my family friend to her dr. appointments and do errands with her, and then gradually doing stuff on my own.

I wish you the best of luck! And hopefully the feeling will ease from your mind.

[cherylsangel]

I am so sorry to hear that, you always think nothing happens in small towns. I totally understand how you feel though, I couldn't imagine the thought of anything happening to my future son. I do agree however that you can't keep him in the house all the time, he needs to experience the outside world, even at his age. Maybe take him to the mall or other places around town that you can go shopping or something, so your still inside but in different surroundings? That way your not stuck at home, but your not outside where the cars are.