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Boyfriend possible incest relationship with his sister
Hello, my name is Stephanie. My boyfriend and I have been dating for 4 months now so everything is still very fresh... He's 24 and I'm 23... We were introduced to each other through some close friends and hit it off things have been great.... Just tonight I made a startling discovery my close friend which whom introduced us confided in me a secret about my boyfriend. She didn't know if she should even tell me and of corse I wanted to know and begged her to tell me.... Finally she told me that my boyfriend had admitted to her at one point he had sex with his own blood sister and that they both had a mutual agreement with each other that it would be ok......... My reaction, I'm totally and utterly grossed out by the whole thing and he doesn't know that I know his secret and now I don't know if I feel the same about him anymore... If it's true I'm done... Should I even bother to ask of should I just end it... Please help I guess my question is should I tell him I know or should I just leave him now and forget about making a future with him since that would never be able to happen if he did have sex with his sister
I think he is lying about the situation, specially if he asked you if his own family told you. Wake up! Apparently he has told more than one person about this rather then your friend.
This is a really really old post, but i have to add something. When it comes to blended families, that throw unrelated hormonal teenagers together in the same house, while parent's are out working, sexual relationships ensue. I don't think you can hold step brother's and sisters to the same strict "norms" that you would blood related relatives.
Hang on a second. Something is being overlooked here! And it's too important to overlook. Even if you are long broken up with this guy, maybe this will help others.
It's interesting that he asked if his brother or father said it. THAT should have sent up huge red flags. It's one thing for some catty friend to try to start a rumor for the sake of drama. But if he assumes his own blood relations told you, I think there's a lot more that needs addressing. Why would he assume firstly, or even AT ALL, that it was his FATHER or BROTHER unless there was an incident that either of those people knew about.
Hopefully, you ended it with that guy. But to just assume it's idle gossip and dismiss something like that would be a mistake, especially if he lets slip that he suspects his own family of telling you.
It's interesting that he asked if his brother or father said it. THAT should have sent up huge red flags. It's one thing for some catty friend to try to start a rumor for the sake of drama. But if he assumes his own blood relations told you, I think there's a lot more that needs addressing. Why would he assume firstly, or even AT ALL, that it was his FATHER or BROTHER unless there was an incident that either of those people knew about.
Hopefully, you ended it with that guy. But to just assume it's idle gossip and dismiss something like that would be a mistake, especially if he lets slip that he suspects his own family of telling you.
Ditto SM.
Like I thought................nothing but drama and nonsense. Sounds like high school teenagers and gossip. The story is all twisted and bent.
I think your friend just wanted to start drama between you and him. That's what I think.
I would kick that friend to the curb and continue dating him. This friend is nothing but a liar and a trouble maker.
Like I thought................nothing but drama and nonsense. Sounds like high school teenagers and gossip. The story is all twisted and bent.
I think your friend just wanted to start drama between you and him. That's what I think.
I would kick that friend to the curb and continue dating him. This friend is nothing but a liar and a trouble maker.
COMMUNITY LEADER
Do you like the guy? I mean, I don't know what happened but if you like him, if he seems like a man of good character now, just move on.
I think your friend who told you is a jerk. I knew a guy with a pretty dark secret and one of my girlfriends was interested in him. I told her before she went out with him. Like why wait until you two are a couple?
I'd try to move on. If you can't without ever knowing the full truth or accepting that he didn't when he says he didn't, then move on. good luck
I think your friend who told you is a jerk. I knew a guy with a pretty dark secret and one of my girlfriends was interested in him. I told her before she went out with him. Like why wait until you two are a couple?
I'd try to move on. If you can't without ever knowing the full truth or accepting that he didn't when he says he didn't, then move on. good luck
UPDATE***
Ok so here's how it goes he gets home from work last night, I finally decided to just be honest and ask him only because I'm having a hard time believing this whole thing to be true, I also have my doubts about the story to begin with also thinking the same thing is my "friend" lying to me? So I didn't tell him who told me at first just said I heard from someone that he had told them he admitted to having a sexual relationship with..... and I couldn't seem to spit out the rest of it , I just paused and he basically finished my sentence for me "someone said I had sex with my sister" I was shocked I didn't even manage to say that part yet and he took the words out of my mouth!! And he continued to repeat the same sentence over and over getting louder and louder "SOMEONE SAID I HAD SEX WITH MY SISTER?????" And then it began he pestered me over and over again, who told you this??? Huh huh?? Was it my dad? Was it my brother? Did my ex girlfriend message you? Who was it? Well at this point I was afraid to tell him not knowing what he would do clearly he was upset and I didn't know how to gage his reaction did I catch him?? Or was he just offended that someone accused him of having sex with his sister?? Anyway he managed to calm down and I didn't tell him until today who told me, and he was all like oh yeah I may have said a lie to her at one point.... Me"WTF?" Why would you lie to our friend about having sex with your sister... Him"I don't ******* know".... ME"well something isn't adding up I know if I didn't have sex with my sister I sure as he'll wouldn't lie about it to someone" ... Him" well I meant my step sister I didn't actually have sex with her but I always kind of had a crush on her and the thought crossed my mind and would have liked to have sex with her".... Me" this is just too weird I don't know what more I can say"... He actually said he would message his sister and ask her if they had sex? So me I said ok do it I want to see what she would say... Not knowing if he would actually do that he really did he proceeded to text her and say hey Stephanie heard from someone that we had sex? Who would say that? She texted back and said....
WTF? That's weird maybe jasmine said that??? Well jasmine is my boyfriends ex... Can anyone get an idea of what's going on here? I'm so confused.... I know we haven't know each other long and maybe I didn't have the right to do this but don't i? I'm his girlfriend and would hope he's a honest man and that my friends is a big twisted lie!!! Ahhhh I'm so drained I like him so much and he would do anything for me and this is killing me... He wants things to work between us and to forget about it all... But it's not easy I feel more confused now then I didn't before confronting him....
Ok so here's how it goes he gets home from work last night, I finally decided to just be honest and ask him only because I'm having a hard time believing this whole thing to be true, I also have my doubts about the story to begin with also thinking the same thing is my "friend" lying to me? So I didn't tell him who told me at first just said I heard from someone that he had told them he admitted to having a sexual relationship with..... and I couldn't seem to spit out the rest of it , I just paused and he basically finished my sentence for me "someone said I had sex with my sister" I was shocked I didn't even manage to say that part yet and he took the words out of my mouth!! And he continued to repeat the same sentence over and over getting louder and louder "SOMEONE SAID I HAD SEX WITH MY SISTER?????" And then it began he pestered me over and over again, who told you this??? Huh huh?? Was it my dad? Was it my brother? Did my ex girlfriend message you? Who was it? Well at this point I was afraid to tell him not knowing what he would do clearly he was upset and I didn't know how to gage his reaction did I catch him?? Or was he just offended that someone accused him of having sex with his sister?? Anyway he managed to calm down and I didn't tell him until today who told me, and he was all like oh yeah I may have said a lie to her at one point.... Me"WTF?" Why would you lie to our friend about having sex with your sister... Him"I don't ******* know".... ME"well something isn't adding up I know if I didn't have sex with my sister I sure as he'll wouldn't lie about it to someone" ... Him" well I meant my step sister I didn't actually have sex with her but I always kind of had a crush on her and the thought crossed my mind and would have liked to have sex with her".... Me" this is just too weird I don't know what more I can say"... He actually said he would message his sister and ask her if they had sex? So me I said ok do it I want to see what she would say... Not knowing if he would actually do that he really did he proceeded to text her and say hey Stephanie heard from someone that we had sex? Who would say that? She texted back and said....
WTF? That's weird maybe jasmine said that??? Well jasmine is my boyfriends ex... Can anyone get an idea of what's going on here? I'm so confused.... I know we haven't know each other long and maybe I didn't have the right to do this but don't i? I'm his girlfriend and would hope he's a honest man and that my friends is a big twisted lie!!! Ahhhh I'm so drained I like him so much and he would do anything for me and this is killing me... He wants things to work between us and to forget about it all... But it's not easy I feel more confused now then I didn't before confronting him....
1 Comments
This post is old as hell but I hope you're still getting notifs.
This guy is SHADY as hell! And here is why:
1) The lie like this is too intricate to invent and tell. If she wanted to lie to you she would say that he had sex with a random girl and cheated on you.
2) He finished the sentence before you, it seems as if this is a secret he was scared of being leaked, but he expected it at some point
3) He assumed his immediate family told you. Why would he suspect them first? Why would they lie to you? If it was a lie he would accuse some random irrelevant person of spreading the lie.
4) He asking his sister "hey did I have sex with you", well if they mutually agreed upon keeping it hidden forever of course she would say no. What did you expect?
5) Why would you be so scared of break up? You weren't in relationship long, and he is not the only guy out there. Why would you have something like this hang over your heads forever?
And to add, your chickening out and telling who told you is a ****** move. The issue is not about how you found out but is it true or not. I have personally found that if a person pushes "who told you, who told you!" it is because what they told was true. If it was a lie anyone would shrug it off.
Him deflecting about how he had wet dreams about his step sister doesn't help his case. It is another red flag cause he is literally trying to wiggle his way out trough another "secret" which is on same scale but lower level of severity.
This guy is SHADY as hell! And here is why:
1) The lie like this is too intricate to invent and tell. If she wanted to lie to you she would say that he had sex with a random girl and cheated on you.
2) He finished the sentence before you, it seems as if this is a secret he was scared of being leaked, but he expected it at some point
3) He assumed his immediate family told you. Why would he suspect them first? Why would they lie to you? If it was a lie he would accuse some random irrelevant person of spreading the lie.
4) He asking his sister "hey did I have sex with you", well if they mutually agreed upon keeping it hidden forever of course she would say no. What did you expect?
5) Why would you be so scared of break up? You weren't in relationship long, and he is not the only guy out there. Why would you have something like this hang over your heads forever?
And to add, your chickening out and telling who told you is a ****** move. The issue is not about how you found out but is it true or not. I have personally found that if a person pushes "who told you, who told you!" it is because what they told was true. If it was a lie anyone would shrug it off.
Him deflecting about how he had wet dreams about his step sister doesn't help his case. It is another red flag cause he is literally trying to wiggle his way out trough another "secret" which is on same scale but lower level of severity.
I also agree with Londres and a side note, if shes such a good friend, why would she introduce him to you knowing something like this in the first place. If you do care for him, definately ask him about this accusation and tell him who told you. His body language and words used may shed light on his truthfullness. Sometimes people say stupid things but even if he said this is a sign that he might not be right for you in the long run anyway.
Well, you've only been dating 4 months and it is kind of early to start talking about any "future" together.
You are utterly grossed out about what? Who says this is the truth?
Hon, this is nothing more than gossip and she could even be lying and making the whole thing up. If she knew all this about him then why did she introduce you two? Maybe she is looking to start drama between you two.
Something doesn't add up here.
What you should do is not put too much stock into gossip or people who gossip. This so called "friend" is not to be trusted especially if she is going around telling other peoples' deep dark secrets.
Whether it is true or not.........I don't know, but I wouldn't go confronting him with this unless you are prepared for a heated argument/discussion. I guess you can tell him this friend of yours told you this and see what he says.
I wouldn't end things without giving him a chance to defend himself.
You are utterly grossed out about what? Who says this is the truth?
Hon, this is nothing more than gossip and she could even be lying and making the whole thing up. If she knew all this about him then why did she introduce you two? Maybe she is looking to start drama between you two.
Something doesn't add up here.
What you should do is not put too much stock into gossip or people who gossip. This so called "friend" is not to be trusted especially if she is going around telling other peoples' deep dark secrets.
Whether it is true or not.........I don't know, but I wouldn't go confronting him with this unless you are prepared for a heated argument/discussion. I guess you can tell him this friend of yours told you this and see what he says.
I wouldn't end things without giving him a chance to defend himself.
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