Avatar universal

My heart broke

Please help...I don't know what to do...I just found out that my husband who I love the most in my life has slept with a prostitute and also had oral sex with some on our vacation.

PLease help how should I Confront him about it....???
13 Responses
575741 tn?1235669754
That's absolutely aweful!!!! How did you find out? Was it from a reliable source? You need to confront him about it and really start thinking about your future...how long have you been together for? This must be so hard for you, but you need to confront him face to face and pay attention to his actions and his reaction to the whole thing...it will tell you everything...
145992 tn?1341345074
Wait, he cheated on your vacation when you two were together?  That is awful.  I'm so sorry, that is horrible.  I agree with Cootos, he needs to be confronted.  You need to see if he is remorseful and regrettful.  Until you see his reaction, you can't make a well informed decision.  Do you have children together?  Can you forgive him?  Do you trust that it will never happen again?  These are all the questions you need to ask yourself.  Only you can really decide what to do.  Just know, my heart goes out to you.
Avatar universal
The way you bring this up to him will have a lot of weight on how he answers you. Gather your facts first, decide what you want to do based on how he replies, and you'll have to decide (based on what you know about him) on how to confront him.
579906 tn?1225303477
get out of it. u deserve someone who will be as faithful to u as you are to them. and if you decide to stay with him, i recommend counseling for you both to figure out why he did it and if it is worth working on . good luck hun
599316 tn?1256921613
I would leave....seriously because now that you know your going to spend a long time not trusting him and that isnt healthy for a relationship. Let alone him cheating you. I know you love him and cant imagine life without him i was the same way with my ex but i GUARENTEE you will find someone eles who is just as amazing and will treat you better. There are SOOO many guys out there. I am married now to a wonderful man who is amazing to me. I fell in love again (i never thought i would after my ex) In fact i almost forgot my ex lol Please dont screw your life up because of this selfish guy. Life is too short....you only live once, move on and enjoy your life.
Avatar universal
1st of all - how did he have enough time away from you on your vacation to even do that....I mean, you didn't question his whereabouts?

2nd of all - did you catch him in the act or get your information from a third party and was this third party *reliable*

3rd of all - before going postal, you need to get ALL of the facts FIRST.  Don't just say "oh you slept with a prostitute on our vacation, how could you?"....he's going to deny that left & right.  You need to be a detective and get as much information you can about the situation and THEN take all that you know and lay it out in front of his face.

Good luck....that's a heart-dropping situation to be in.  I know.  Best of luck!
Avatar universal
I'm definetly lost.....I know he is a good man and he wouldn't do such thing, I used to trust him.  The problem when we were on vacation he had some single friends and he went with them some nights, so I think they did push him to do such things because they did it and they don't care.

We do have children together....we have one cute boy.
I did confront him, he denied it at the begining, but then he said he regrets it and i hope it wont happen again, because if it will...this will be the end of our marriage.

Avatar universal
I want to ask women out there.....I'm a young beautiful women and I always try to satisfy my husband needs.......
Why would men cheat on women? why?
145992 tn?1341345074
My fiance was unfaithful recently and I'm trying to get the answer to that question.  I think it's different reasons.  Some men are unhappy in their relationship, some can't be with just one woman, some get their egos stroked by these women, some men need a lot of sex.  It's sad really.  I don't understand it myself.  I wish you luck in healing.  I'm still working on that and we are in couples counseling.  Every day is a challenge but hopefully we can come out of this a stronger couple and so can you.  About him being persuaded by friends, don't fall for that.  He did it because he wanted to do it.  No one can convince a man to cheat if he doesn't want to.  Another thing, don't blame yourself.  I know easier said then done but it's not you, it's him.
575741 tn?1235669754
Men cheat because society makes them believe its ok....no matter what kind of wife a husband has sometimes they cant control themselves and dont think about the consequences and damage until afterwards...and most women are forgiving the first time and men know this...I'm not saying all men are bad news but porn is a big factor in cheating too because it's starts off as looking at images of naked women doing things alot of wives just dont do so their curiosity starts to soar then their eyes begin to wander and before you know it they end up cheating....I really dont understand how relationships work after the significant other betrayed the trust....but I'm not as strong of a woman as some are. I really hope the best for you both, please keep your eyes and ears open and alert....And please dont ever bring this onto yourselves...remember he's the guilty one for his actions...not you!
404138 tn?1308941656
Cootos-I hope your dead wrong about the porno.

Nadiasad-some men will apologize and say sorry abillion times over just to get you back.
Some men are REALLY sorry. If you think he's really sorry then I would go to marriage counseling and only if he's in it with you fighting to make things right.....otherwise I would leave. I hate that this happens to so many good women,it *****!!!
I wish you the best.
377600 tn?1225163436
I'm sorry you are going through this.  I feel really bad for you as you sound so nice.  
599316 tn?1256921613
Well he has control over his actions he should of said no and walked away from the situation. I think men cheat because they are so use to one person its like a high of some sort with another women, something new, something different. Please look into it further my ex said he would never do it again and it was a mistake and showed me so much love and affection,. He ws so romantic and it sucked because it made me smile but 6 months to a year later he cheated again. In fact every b/f did that but my husband. The choice is yours, can you live with the distrust in him day by day?
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