Does it mean we are over?

[feellost]

I met this guy through a dating website. He invited me to stay over with him twice, and I went, but I did not feel ready to have real sex yet. The initial intention was I wanna spend more time with him and find out more about him. He was a bit pushy during these nights, but we ended up not doing much as I insisted. He said he could wait and would let me know if he could not anymore...

Last time when we really wanted it to happen, and it nearly happened, but he suddenly said he was not interested and said it was all his problem (psychological), but not sure why...He drove me home and said he needed time to think about it. He started to smoke again, which he quitted before. I forced him to come over and talked to him that it is not good for him to 'go backwards' --I mean restart to smoke... I feel he is deviated from me...

Maybe we are not right for each other? We did have fun and enjoyed each other's company. He also showed he wanna settle down...

What shall I do?  

[ApRiLGeTsAngry77]

If you are still interested in this guy ( and it sounds like you are) I would suggest telling him that you want to become friends first. Take the relationship back a couple of notches and focus on getting to know each other better.

[feellost]

Sorry...I meant to say I haven't really put myself out there...

[feellost]

I agree that 'sex' is only what he wants and I feel lucky that I have really put myself completely there. I plan to move on and find a decent man who deserve my true love! Thanks everyone's comments which are enlightening!

Thanks again!

[mami1323]

According to your other post you and him just met.  It's a little too soon to be telling him what he can and cannot do.  Like specialmom says no calling for interventions so soon in the game.  From what I can gather, this guy is only interested in one thing and that's sex.  He doesn't sound like he cares, he sounds inpatient and like he's getting aggravated and to me, those are both bad signs.  His response about not getting into a relationship until after sex is another sign that he wants just sex.  I say, cut your loses and move on to a man who can tolerate a woman taking her time.

[PromisedLand]

I get a sense that this guy is trouble from what you've written and agree with specialmom as well..too much is going on too soon in the relationship and it sounds like this is what it is destined for.


Jim

[specialmom]

I think that casual dating means that you can dislike someone smoking but can't call them for an intervention if they start again.  If it is a deal breaker for you, then do not date him.  I imagine this was a problem for him.  Trying to change someone early on in a relationship usually backfires.

I think you don't know what is happening nor does anyone.  I don't know how close you got but it sounds like he may have an issue or two.  I'd sit tight and see if he calls and in the mean time,  keep your eyes open for another guy.  

This is just my opinion.  I wish you the best of luck.

[trustn0man32]

All he wanted from you was sex. Since u didn't give it up he's mad. He's just trying to use u. If he really cared he would respect u and your decision to wait. I think you should forget about him and find someone who will respect you. Good Luck!

[feellost]

Just add another thing: he said he defines exlusive relationship as after having sex.