needing perspective

[lafreaka]

im not looking for an ok to cheat i just found thath my boyfriend has been on the net giving the impression he is available for sex... i dont know if  its coz im prewgnant again (for the fourth time) and am too hormonal to see the innocent looking side..

[RockRose]

lafreaka,  I don't see how right now you CAN be in a position of strength.  If I were you I'd be reeling in shock.  You have two children,  your darling baby has Downs Syndrome and you're just now beginning your journey of joys and sorrows with him (and there will be sorrows,  you'll have to fight for that child tooth and nail when he goes to school,  that he be treated fairly and get what he needs) and now you're pregnant again and your boyfriend is cheating.  

I think right now you're in shock and don't even know WHAT to feel.  

God bless you,   and your children,  and prayers your boyfriend somehow has a change of heart and sticks with you through what will be a difficult but blessed path.

[lafreaka]

thanks for being frank... i want to be in a position of strength..

[grannienannie]

Question him about it...thats not right if your pregnant..I would tell him if he wants to act like he is available for sex..then go but dont put you and the baby at risk for picking up an STD..cause tell him if he is trying to do dirt behind your back and if he is using condoms...HE CAN STILL CATCH CRABS...Tell him..

[specialmom]

Hm.  Well, I don't think hormones have anything to do with this.  There really is no innocent side.  If he were just 'looking' at porn, okay.  But communicating with others and saying he is available means he is most likely up to no good.  I think you must confront him about this.  Has he cheated before?  How is the relationship as a whole?  

Why haven't you married with 3 children and one on the way?  I'm just curious.  Which one of you doesn't want to take the relationship to the next level?  

I am being sincere here.  I don't know what is going on but you as a mother of soon to be 4 needs to think about what would happen if this relationship doesn't work out.  Do you have support?  Do you have some way of living without him?  Do you work?  Think about these things and just keep them in the back of your mind for your own protection.  If you can not support yourself and live without this guy, start making plans to do so . . . just in case.  I hope it doesn't come to that but don't want you vulnerable to him and letting a bad situation slide because you have nowhere else to go.  I want you in a position of strength.  Best wishes.