Is he really cheap?

[cveta23]

I was allways wonderng what does it mean when your boyfriend is cheap? My boyfrind is nice loving men who works hard and very determint to make more money. He makes now over 250.000. I am a student, work part time, strogale to pay my own bills. I don't understand..... may be I don't understand something but don't you think my boyfrind could help me with something. On Chrismas for example I bought a very nice present for him. I saved money for few month so I could buy something that I know he wanted and he bought me parfume. I was in shock!!! I could say that he was uncomfortable when he opened his gift. He immediatelly offered me to go in expensive place to eat and now he is offering me to buy a phone, because I need a new phone and I don't have money to spend on the phone. My boyfriend takes me for dinner and sometimes rents hotel for romantic night. but he never offers me any financial support, or gives me gifts. He constanly complains about his previous marriage and how his wife stold all the money form him and that is why he does not trust women anymore. What kind of excuse is that? So I don't understand whether my expectations are too high or my boyfrind is really cheap...

[Talz]

You know I have to say Im in your boat..
I have been with my boyfriend and he makes ALOT of money!!! Im a student as well and Im broke as a joke.. I spent alot more on him for Christmas, and He didnt spend as much on me at all... He doesnt take me to fancy hotels.. he doesnt take me to fancy places at all (actually he never has)... he doesnt support me financially, and I was really upset about it, but then it dawned on me... it was my stupid choice to go and spend so much money on him for christmas when I didnt have any, he never asked me to...
He has no obligation to give me ANYTHING... we're not married, were not even living together.. and I know that if i asked, he would give me money without hesitation...
He pays for me most of the time when we go eat.. and all that jazz...

Honestly, if it bothers you, then you should be able to talk to him about it..
I talked to mine and the first thing he said was.. "what do u need babe?"

Think about hon, he works hard for his money, he earned it, why do u think he should be giving it to you, just because he has alot of it?

I understand that its not that u want his money u just wish that he would think of you, and think that maybe you need some help.

I just realized that I dont want his money I was just nore upset that he idnt realize the situation at hand...

[slow_healer]

No offense, but if he's just your boyfriend at this point and you aren't living together, IMO it's not his obligation to financially support you. It sounds like he lavishes you with the kind of attention that anyone would expect from a boyfriend. He's even offered to help you buy a phone. It sounds like you think he should help you with your bills.

Next time talk about your financial limits for the christmas, because seriously, if I was dating someone who I knew was struggling with money and then spent a rather unusual amount on me for christmas (especially if they knew 100% that I wasn't asking to have that much spent on me), I'd definitely suspect they're trying to guilt me into spending more on them. If you want support why does it have to be in the form of monetary gifts? If you're struggling then the biggest support you could have would be to live with a roommate and cut your rent right there. I'm sorry, but I just don't agree that he should *have to* financially support you only because he makes more money. It was your choice to spend so much on him for christmas, and it just doesn't sound as heartfelt when you complain about not getting as much as you should have in return.

[kprejean0817]

yea it seems to be that he is still scared at what his ex wife did.  I would maybe talk to him about it!

[sugarpea013]

Yeah it sounds like he is paranoid about losing his money because of what his ex did. To be honest with you, I kinda see where he is coming from. I had what seemed like a great guy at the time, nexxt thing you know he's mooching all my money. Not saying you are doing that whatsoever, please don't take it that way. How long have ya'll been together?