Getting over axiety of std

[bleach1200]

How does one get over the axiety of an std. I have fear of stds. I had protected sex about 2 years ago.the condom fell off once and i penetrated once. but then put back on. I had std tsts done at 3 month, 6 month, and 1 year, followed by another one about year and a half later. The onl sexual contact i have had is a handjob. That is belive to be of no risk as well. I have gone to a family phycian multiple times who says that i am fine and have nothing to worry about. All tests came back negative except for hsv1. I have coldsores from time to time. I am not sure if i had it from before or it occured recently. after my encounter. Sometimes my penis gets red on one side and kinda stings but i dont really see anything that would resembles herpes except maybe a hair folicle or something. I have gone to dermatologist he believe i am fine as well. They believe that since it is on my life it would be very difficult for it to be on my genitals. I am honestly trying to get over this. But for some reason i can not. I need to figure out how. Its not like i tested positive for everything . ONly hsv 1 and i have cold sore. But on the genitals when ever there is something out fo the ordinary i tend to have epic freak outs. I have gone to ENT to check for HPV of the mouth and as well as another dermatologist. Everyone says that i am fine. I dont know why I am unable to belive it my self. I ahve been looking at thsi site and i ahve psoted like crazy. I dont understand why I am unable o accept this. Why cant i get over this. If it is HPV it ill go away in 32 years. If it is herpes it woul show on blood test. The Doctors says i am fine. They have okaied me to go and be sexually active. I jsut dont understand. I feel like i am a horrible person. I am only 20. why do i feel this way. I feel like these feelings are triggered by stress and personal family matters. I am Just looking for kind words and help to understand me. I never knew I would ever go through something like this. I posted on forums avbout these thigns included pics as well everyone says it looks like dryness or its ok no signs of anything. maybe a fungus or a bacteria infection.  I jsut want to be ok. I just want to be normal. I just want to be innocent. I jsut want to be the son that my parents would be proud of. The brother that a sibling would be porud of. The grandson who they would be porud of. Please help me understand this. I am Just looking to be normal again.

[bleach1200]

yeah I know its just I am trying to gwt over this its just ao hard
I postwd in dermatology they think it could be a yeast thing it doesn't look like herpes I think
it does feel little itxh and stingy now.
it did not yesterday but today whn I walk it feel itchy. this is after I pt the cream on. I am fairly sure it is jothing I don't know why I am freaking out

[Tony19821]

I think you need to seek out medical help but not for any STDs as you already know you don't have any. I think you should speak to a therapist to find the root cause of your irrational fear of STDs. Everybody has sex it's nothing to be ashamed.