Hi Katie, for your dryness try taken some vitamin B6, you should find this helps, but in the mean time try some kind of oil as a lubricant, there is a good site you may find very intresting, just googel dobson and ross, you may find some of your answers over climaxing and ways to do it.
The car accident proberly did not help, do you think that you are back to your old self, you can only use them as markers to you health now and sexual health now.
Do hope this helps.
Good Luck
If you feel it more when your by yourself then your most likely not that sexually attracted to her. I dont believe its the way shes touching you as you most likely would have said something to her during your moments You are pleasing her for some other reason. In my experience when im sexually attracted to a person, its gung hoe.