no desire for sex

[kgill78]

I have a serious problem.  I am 30 years old been married to my husband for 10 years, we have 3 little boys.  I go to school full-time and work part-time.  He works full-time.  My problem is that I have no desire to have sex.  There's nothing wrong with him.  It's all me.  He would like it everyday and more if he could.  And I could just as well be a nun for the rest of my life and be perfectly fine.  Our marriage is in serious trouble.  It's not anything he's done in the past.  I've already let all that go.  I was sexually abused as a child and my mom was very free about sex.  She's always was really loud and didn't care if we saw her doing it with one of her many husbands.  That whole thing was very traumatizing to me.  But I don't know why that's bothering me now.  I run about 19-23 miles a week and am building up my mileage.  I am tired a lot and need about 2 pots of coffee to keep myself going throughout the day.  Maybe it's something physical.  I can't really pinpont what is going on with me.  Anyone have any ideas?

[HeatherSimba]

I would cut down on the coffee.I have 3 kids and don't do as much as you.I would be totaly wiped out at the end of the day too.My want to have sex is gone to I would become a nun too if I could.Iv'e said that so many times lol...    My husband doesn't like that I feel that way either.Live is busy and I try to get together with my husband once a week.You need to some how slow down a little .Atlease do you get help with the house chores? My husband helps as much as he can to free up some of my time.

[Alfonz]

It sounds like there are a lot of different issues coming into play here. Being sexually abused and the scenes that you talked about could definitely affect your sexual relationship, and these conflicts may need to be resolved. But, saying that, it sounds like you might just be too exhausted. You have a very active lifestyle with work, full-time school, 3 boys, and on top of all of that you run a significant distance every week! Just calm down a little bit, cardio is good for you, but maybe that much is not exactly what you need right now. Maybe try a yoga class if you want to be active.
Additionally, I don't know how big your coffee pot is, but that is a significant amount of coffee. No one is a bigger proponent of coffee than me, but all in moderation. All of this coffee can have negative side effects, don't just go off it, but start drinking less and less so you don't get all of those withdrawal symptoms like headaches. It has been shown that coffee drinkers HAVE to have coffee to meet the alertness level of a non-coffee drinker because their bodies do not rely on coffee. Coffee also constricts the cerebral blood vessels-does not hurt with regular amounts of coffee but that much might be pushing it.  
Relax, stop blaming yourself, and don't worry about this too much, it only makes it worse. Maybe just a little down time with your kids, possibly yoga, and less coffee is all you need!! Good luck!