Offers for help - do I need them?

[DarlaLOU]

OK being that I have a few weeks till' my surgery I am trying to be really well planned out as far as what is going to be happening with my family and home. I dont' want to leave my hubby up in arms for keeping things together. I have had ooooodles of offer for help during surgery and recovery and I have made a point to tell every person that I would GLADLY take their help and will let them know what/when they can do for us.  
Dh's parents are coming that weekend (I have surgery on Fri) and will stay through Sunday, which is cool. Also have a friend taking all day Sat off to be here at the house with the kids as needed. DH will prob have the following Mon-Tues off if needed and our best friends, Blake and Lisa, have said they will be here at the drop of a word if needed and actually she will be with me the day of surgery too. My sisters have offered help, ladies from church, neighbors, friends. I am so blessed.
BUT... honestly, how much help do you really think I'll need?  I mean, all 4 of my kids are in school full time all day and I only will have the baby that I watch here (newborn, not a lot of time/energy involved). My ladies from church want to bring in dinner a few nights, do I accept or is that necessary? Part of me thinks I should jump on any and all help offered but I don't want to be rediculous either.
I am figuring that whole first week I should just take as slow as possible and take all the help offered? Is that too much? Just don't want to be selfish I guess but dont' want to be stupid either!!!
I think that first 2 days (over the weekend) will be the worst of it so I am not sure what to do.....

Thanks!
Darla

[DarlaLOU]

THANK YOU guys! I was really getting to feel a bit "needy" until I read all these replies. I am certain that you are right in that I should get as much rest as possible and avoid the "need to entertain" people. LOL I do that too!
However, I plan to lock myself away in my bedroom and to be honest, if I am tired or hurting I will not hesitate to tell my family to tell visitors I am resting. Am I bad or what??
Last spring when I had the stomach flu we had some people stop by... I was literally DYING in the bedroom, they are all out there chatting away, I proceeded to get up, SLAM the door shut and let them know I was TRY*ING to rest!  Think I'll try to be a bit nicer this time but hey, a woman's gotta do what a woman's gotta do, right? LOL Hopefully I won't be feeling THAT sick this time around!

Thanks again!
Darla

[redhed87]

People want to help and you need to let them.  I had an overabundance of help too.  Many times, people don't know wha tto say and this is their way of expressing their emotions by doing.  You would do the same thing for a friend or family member.  I had to realize that.

[kipland]

Wow - that's me!!  I DO feel the need to entertain too!!  I swear to you, I haven't had many quiet moments since surgery last week.  Between the phone ringing (jeez....no wonder I have no voice!), and people stopping over, I haven't had time to even watch a full movie!!!  I just want to SLEEP!  But, I am thankful to have so many people that care about me, and my mom has been a lifesaver.  I'm glad she lives close!!

[dart frog]

I would take the help...unless you think all those people coming in and out all the time will drive you nuts....OR if your one of those people that think you have to "entertain" people who are in your house then you might not get as much rest as you think

At the very least I would take the offer for the dinners. Like Kipland I was only intrested in eating soft foods or liquids but the family wanted REAL food. Im the only one in the house that knows how to cook so I had to make my food AND theirs........at times they could have starved and I wouldnt have cared. :-)

[scarlet37]

  Ditto! - take the help while you can get it.

You must be a special person to have so many offers of help, you can always do something special for them later when you're feeling better.

  teresa
  

[kitcurious]

Say YES!!!!!!!!  You will get the rest you need and they will feel so happy to help you because they care about you. Everybody wins  :-D

[kipland]

I agree with Venora.  Take all the help you can get.  I am a little over a week post surgery and feel pretty darned good.  I've been cooking and doing pretty normal things, although I tend to get worn out really easy.  The first few days, I wouldn't have wanted to cook at all.  Thank goodness I had a lot of help as well!  

Before I went in, I made sure I had a lot of "soft" stuff around the house.  Popsicles, jello, pudding, soup, etc.  I'm glad I did, because of the difficulties I had with swallowing afterwards.  Your throat will probably be sore, so be sure to have some of those soothing goodies on hand.

Lori

[Venora Moonwind]

Honey take the help. You need to be able to really take it easy and rest and heal after your surgery.Many of us set our recovery time back by trying to do too much too soon.Especially the dinner offers. you wont feel much like cooking. Take good care of yourself.
Love Venora