Women's Health: Postpartum Community
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Avatar universal

ALL TTC'ers Successful or Unsuccessful (so far anyway...good luck) anyone, please help!

So after months...no years... of trying we were successful and needless to say I don't have a baby today! We all know how the story goes...those of us that have been here. I've posted before a few of you may be aware of my story...anyhoo cut to now, it's been 7 months since the (unforunate incident) I call it that because I just can't say M/C again, I can't even form my lips to say it and I definitely am not going to type it, anyway 7 months since then and we're trying again.

My concern is, is that this time we've (DH and I) had open dialogue about it, as to where before it was "baby I want to do whatever you want to do" which wasn't a problem, because initially he was the one that put the "whole baby thing" out there and I was completely thrown off guard but in a good way. We already have a 10 year old which we had her when we were 17 and we just got married after we both finished school, and now this time we were trying to do it right. Anyway after he brought it up, I took it and ran and so we were off on our journey of ttc. Over the last 3 year's we've faced so many obstacles from hormonal arguing to "that thing that I can't say" (several times) to an actual 2 week seperation because ttc had just completely taken over our lives, and then it happend what we thought was our successful one, but as we know it ended in "that thing I can't say". A year ago I was finally diagnosed with PCOS and have been on Metformin which helped us the last time but we know how that ended. Cut to now...I've been taking my meds regularly and we are back to that "Ok it's time to try again mode"!

As I said earlier this time we've had open dialogue about it and I've found out through the conversation(s) that my DH has had just as hard of a time as I had, He was/is really hurt and scared by our unsuccessful attempts and he is also scared of what it has done to us, and unfortunately I know that along with the clomiphene comes the crazy mood swings and the irrational behavior on my part (of course) but I also know that this is how it is...no other options available...right now. He said he would be patient and understanding this time and I of course told him that I would do the same and which ever way this thing works out we would be there with each other and deal with it together, and we would not give up until there was a definite NO from the RE that ok it's not going to happen.

Also my DH is gunho about this time, but I since that he's a little skeptical and when I asked if he was sure or if he wanted to wait for a while longer he said NO he was ready now and I believe that, but I still can't shake the feeling that the poor thing is nervous, How do I help with that?

So all of that to say this, what do we do, how do we deal with the stress of this, we've been here before and I know that stress definitely does not help the situation at all, but if there is anyone out there that understand what I'm saying please help!  As always any help is good help!
4 Responses
296076 tn?1371338074
I have pcos also... no period for 3 years I went through a year of fertility treatments for my second child.. I found that clomid thinned my lining (have you had yours measured?)  and I had to do 2 rounds of injectables with iui to get pg.. she is now 6..

fast forward...

I got divorced lost 100lbs and my cycle returned to normal and I got pg the first month without even trying... I think one key to pcos fertility is loosing weight.. that said I don't even know if you are over weight.. I think the next key is maintaining sugar levels.. (low carb diet) because pcos goes hand in hand with insulin resistance....  

good luck it is hard on men harder than we think.. they are loosing a baby also..
Avatar universal
Hi Thanks So Much for the response and the story. I am overweight btw waaaayyyy over weight and I just had to get medroxyprogesterone to start my cycle and then of course the clomid along with the metformin...etc.

I have been loossing weight slowly, but I haven't lately (as in the last 4 months) been really focusing on loosing weight haven't really been giving it my all, but of course I'm going to be more focused now than before and a little more patient as well. Thanks

I have been maintaining a low carb diet so that's a good start I will continue on and congrats on your pregnancy. Thanks again!
296076 tn?1371338074
I wish you luck, loosing weight is very hard and 3x as hard for someone with pcos.. that being said.. I was at one time 287 and when I got to 220 my cycle was completely back to normal I got pg the first month when I was 185 so it isn't like you have to get to 130 to have your fertility be affected positively.  I think even if you still have to use fertility meds you increase your chances of pg by some weight.  Also have you had your progesterone checked?  I had to take progesterone to maintain my pg.  and really have your lining checked while you are on clomid.

Like you I also had secondary infertility.  I got pg without trying with my first dd when I was 22... the weight came on and I lost my period and bla bla bla.... But if you can make low carb a lifestyle and do some exercise it does come off and stay off.. I lost it riding my bike.. I was too embarassed to go to the gym.. but curves is great... all women...   luck to you
Avatar universal
Thank you so much, and I need to just drop some of this weight asap obviously, thanks again for you help. I appreciate it a ton! It's just very hard and I'm trying not to worry! Thanks again!
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