Women's Health: Postpartum Community
26.1k Members
Avatar universal

Miscarriage - Depression

At 10 weeks pregnant I had some brown spotting very minimal but it came about once to twice a day.. I then was booked in for a ultrasound today to find that my fetus had stopped growing around 5 weeks.. I am devastated.. this was a unplanned pregnancy however my boyfriend has made it very clear that we are not going to try for another any time soon if ever for this reason.  I feel so alone and empty inside and I don't know what to do with myself.. I was so excited for march to come and he seemed excited too now he is just this solem..heartless..thing.. he has now left in a rage.. and I just am very alone and need some advice.
3 Responses
162279 tn?1270604959
Oh sweetheart I am so sorry! I had a miscarriage too, back in Sep 2006. My baby was 16 weeks along...and just died inside me. It was the worst thing I have ever endured. Believe me, I KNOW how hard it is right now. I wanted to die. I honestly couldn't imagine EVER getting over it. But, with time, your heart heals. You never forget completely, but the pain doesn't stay as raw as it is now.
But, there is no magic "fix" for the pain you feel right at the beginning. It WILL hurt like crazy. The best thing I can tell you is that it won't always hurt this bad. And somewhere down the road, you can have another baby. I got pregnant 4 months after I lost that baby, and only then did I feel happier. Even though your boyfriend is saying he doesn't know if he ever wants to have a baby again, he is most likely saying this out of hurt and anger. Once he calms down, I am betting he will want to try again.
Although, I am a little concerned about a man that would treat you this way when you are hurting so much.He should be consoling you, and crying with you...not "leaving in a rage"...I'm sorry if that's offensive for me to say, but I know how you are feeling and you NEED your man there with you. Not angry and walking out on you.
Hopefully he is just very upset and doesn't know a healthy way to express it.Try to talk together and share your pain. Pain is easier to carry when you do it together.
Again, I am so sorry this happened to you. *HUGS*
Avatar universal
I don't know what to do with myself right now, my boyfriend doesn't want to try for a baby he's not ready to be a dad, he told me that he doesn't want to marry me, he only asked my dad and told me he wanted to to make me happy. I feel like my world is falling into peices.. I don't know what I can do.. I cant even leave the house I cant drive I feel like i want to drive off the road when i do.. I feel like I cant do this.. I dont know where to go I cant answer my phone I cant do anything but cry..
162279 tn?1270604959
Do you have any sisters, friends, or a mom you can talk to? I am concerned for your state of mind, sweetie. You sound extremely depressed. Do you belong to any church? Your bishop/pastor/priest could help you too.
PLEASE don't do anything rash.This is only a short time in the span of life. There are better times ahead!! I know it may not seem like it, but things DO get better. And I am sorry if this offends you, but your boyfriend doesn't seem like he is being very nice. You sound like a sweet girl who deserves much better treatment.
Popular Resources
From skin changes to weight loss to unusual bleeding, here are 15 cancer warning signs that women tend to ignore.
Here’s what you need to know about the transition into menopause – and life after the change takes place.
It’s more than just the “baby blues.“ Learn to recognize the signs of postpartum depression – and how to treat it.
Forget the fountain of youth – try flossing instead! Here are 11 surprising ways to live longer.
From STD tests to mammograms, find out which screening tests you need - and when to get them.
Find out if PRP therapy right for you.