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9 year old in awful situation, need advice
Hi I know this mother and has a 9 year old girl.
The situation is very bad. I am not too involved or anything, but I do see them from time to time and would like to help the young girl, if I am able, perhaps even just to give her some advice.
Her mum is addicted to methamphetamine, she injects it.
The mother is absolutely awful to the girl, physically violent, never affectionate, constant screaming at her and putting her down. The girl eats like crap, he main feed is chips that the fish and chip shop give her out of sympathy.
The little girl seems very disturbed, and says some awful things, such as he she wants to be dead etc. She also gets very angry at times, but is terrified of her mother.
The girl was raped by some males the mother let babysit her, and Child Protection was aware of this case, ultimately it was decided that there was not enough evidence to prosecute the males that had sex with her. The mother walked in when one of males was having intercourse with her and the girl was crying.
She displays some sexualized behavior, and the girl i don't know she goes up to strangers as if she knows them.
The mother frequently called the girl a s**t and says she wants sex etc, says she keeps using her "***** power" to try to get men to sleep with her.
The mother has a large variety of random, crazy people over at the house. Some of these she sleep with for money to get her drugs. It is concerning cause some have asked her if they could pay for her daughter to have sex with them.
Also been some guy that has full blown psychosis, is extremely nuts he comes around there. He did something really bad with the mother next door who had a new born baby, she was so frightened that she has moved and left the house. He was arrested, but out a few days later.
On one occasion, I saw one of the guys there, a person who sells methamphetamine, was showing off a loaded gun. In my country, guns are highly illegal. The mother, being stupid asked to hold the gun, and pointed it at her daughter and said "I think I should shoot you" and the daughter was crying.
The house is AWFUL in terms of mess and totally stinks, rubbish everywhere, lots of roaches.
Please know that Child Protection has been told about it, and various people have called the police, but nothing happens basically.
The mother has Borderline Personality Disorder, and I have been trying to explain to the little girl about her mum, and how not to set her mum off to avoid getting hit so much/abused. I don't know really how to explain this, and would be after advice as to what I can tell the girl, so she can learn to better handle the way her mother is.
Some other points about the situation:
* Girl has not attended school much (especially recently), and cannot read or write.
* She cries a great deal and gets scared very, very easily.
* Girl has been caught putting noose around her neck, and has cut her arms several times.
* Mother is awake for many days in a row and gets progressively more aggro and violent the longer she is awake. Then she sleeps for days and days until she can get drugs. Girl can not see mum for various days in a row.
* Mum has been talking about friends doing a "meth lab" in her home and giving her methamphetamine as payment, this is very worrying to me, fear for safety of girl if this is going on.
* Girl has said some strange things like she hears voices in her head saying awful things to her, I don't know how to interpret this
* Some men who have come over have had child porn on their mobile phone (pictures of naked children) and have told the 9 year old girl she is "hot and sexy". Mum told daughter to stop being "s***t*". One man was bragging about child prostitutes he had sex with in Thailand.
* On one occasion the little girl was brought back by police because she was standing on the train tracks (a long walk away) and refused to get off. She told me she wanted the train to hit her.
* When I was with her little girl lied down on main road saying she wanted to die, and I had to physically drag her off the road.
* Young girl steals from local shop, usually food.
* Young girl hides food and other items in her room in an almost obsessive manner
* Young girl constantly coughs, seems to have bronchitis, many people are constantly smoking in the house. Sometimes they smoke methamphetamine but mother injects it.
* Young girl has constant night mares and constantly wets bed. Bed stinks horribly and is filthy, mother never cleans it (or anything), girl is dirty and smelly.
* Sometimes crazy methamphetamine woman comes over who seems to be psychotic, she also has daughter, and seems to give meth to her daughter and laugh about it, but have not directly witnessed this.
* Oh few more things that come to mind: Mum made girl eat dog feces when she swore once. Mum has knocked girl unconscious with hits to head, but most concerned about herself getting in trouble. Mum is very nasty looking, has tattoo on face, many tattoos and piercings, and shaved head. She has shaved the girls head which upset her as people teased her . Girl often does not go to toilet but urinates around house like animal. Girl often woken up by drunk visitors during night/heaps of noise. Mum constantly picks at daughters skin, daughter hates it but mum will hit her if she refuses. On one night daughter took large amount of unknown tablets deliberately (maybe 20 tablets). Daughter has been caught inhaling butane and other gases, I have warned her that this is very dangerous. Mum sometimes gives alcohol and marijuana to daughter, but not usually because she views that as being "nice" to daughter. Daughter says she is very afraid of some men who mum came around cause they "hurt" her and begged me not to go, and started crying when I had to go.
Well there is lot more, but it is hard to bring it all to mind, very sad. How I can explain to this daughter that her mum has BPD, and how to learn to cope with her mums behavior? Daughter is very isolated has no friends or anything, seems to be victimized by everyone including other kids.
Thanks
The situation is very bad. I am not too involved or anything, but I do see them from time to time and would like to help the young girl, if I am able, perhaps even just to give her some advice.
Her mum is addicted to methamphetamine, she injects it.
The mother is absolutely awful to the girl, physically violent, never affectionate, constant screaming at her and putting her down. The girl eats like crap, he main feed is chips that the fish and chip shop give her out of sympathy.
The little girl seems very disturbed, and says some awful things, such as he she wants to be dead etc. She also gets very angry at times, but is terrified of her mother.
The girl was raped by some males the mother let babysit her, and Child Protection was aware of this case, ultimately it was decided that there was not enough evidence to prosecute the males that had sex with her. The mother walked in when one of males was having intercourse with her and the girl was crying.
She displays some sexualized behavior, and the girl i don't know she goes up to strangers as if she knows them.
The mother frequently called the girl a s**t and says she wants sex etc, says she keeps using her "***** power" to try to get men to sleep with her.
The mother has a large variety of random, crazy people over at the house. Some of these she sleep with for money to get her drugs. It is concerning cause some have asked her if they could pay for her daughter to have sex with them.
Also been some guy that has full blown psychosis, is extremely nuts he comes around there. He did something really bad with the mother next door who had a new born baby, she was so frightened that she has moved and left the house. He was arrested, but out a few days later.
On one occasion, I saw one of the guys there, a person who sells methamphetamine, was showing off a loaded gun. In my country, guns are highly illegal. The mother, being stupid asked to hold the gun, and pointed it at her daughter and said "I think I should shoot you" and the daughter was crying.
The house is AWFUL in terms of mess and totally stinks, rubbish everywhere, lots of roaches.
Please know that Child Protection has been told about it, and various people have called the police, but nothing happens basically.
The mother has Borderline Personality Disorder, and I have been trying to explain to the little girl about her mum, and how not to set her mum off to avoid getting hit so much/abused. I don't know really how to explain this, and would be after advice as to what I can tell the girl, so she can learn to better handle the way her mother is.
Some other points about the situation:
* Girl has not attended school much (especially recently), and cannot read or write.
* She cries a great deal and gets scared very, very easily.
* Girl has been caught putting noose around her neck, and has cut her arms several times.
* Mother is awake for many days in a row and gets progressively more aggro and violent the longer she is awake. Then she sleeps for days and days until she can get drugs. Girl can not see mum for various days in a row.
* Mum has been talking about friends doing a "meth lab" in her home and giving her methamphetamine as payment, this is very worrying to me, fear for safety of girl if this is going on.
* Girl has said some strange things like she hears voices in her head saying awful things to her, I don't know how to interpret this
* Some men who have come over have had child porn on their mobile phone (pictures of naked children) and have told the 9 year old girl she is "hot and sexy". Mum told daughter to stop being "s***t*". One man was bragging about child prostitutes he had sex with in Thailand.
* On one occasion the little girl was brought back by police because she was standing on the train tracks (a long walk away) and refused to get off. She told me she wanted the train to hit her.
* When I was with her little girl lied down on main road saying she wanted to die, and I had to physically drag her off the road.
* Young girl steals from local shop, usually food.
* Young girl hides food and other items in her room in an almost obsessive manner
* Young girl constantly coughs, seems to have bronchitis, many people are constantly smoking in the house. Sometimes they smoke methamphetamine but mother injects it.
* Young girl has constant night mares and constantly wets bed. Bed stinks horribly and is filthy, mother never cleans it (or anything), girl is dirty and smelly.
* Sometimes crazy methamphetamine woman comes over who seems to be psychotic, she also has daughter, and seems to give meth to her daughter and laugh about it, but have not directly witnessed this.
* Oh few more things that come to mind: Mum made girl eat dog feces when she swore once. Mum has knocked girl unconscious with hits to head, but most concerned about herself getting in trouble. Mum is very nasty looking, has tattoo on face, many tattoos and piercings, and shaved head. She has shaved the girls head which upset her as people teased her . Girl often does not go to toilet but urinates around house like animal. Girl often woken up by drunk visitors during night/heaps of noise. Mum constantly picks at daughters skin, daughter hates it but mum will hit her if she refuses. On one night daughter took large amount of unknown tablets deliberately (maybe 20 tablets). Daughter has been caught inhaling butane and other gases, I have warned her that this is very dangerous. Mum sometimes gives alcohol and marijuana to daughter, but not usually because she views that as being "nice" to daughter. Daughter says she is very afraid of some men who mum came around cause they "hurt" her and begged me not to go, and started crying when I had to go.
Well there is lot more, but it is hard to bring it all to mind, very sad. How I can explain to this daughter that her mum has BPD, and how to learn to cope with her mums behavior? Daughter is very isolated has no friends or anything, seems to be victimized by everyone including other kids.
Thanks
I agree, but anything done difficultly would surely be better than the maltreatment the girl is receiving at the hands of her mother.
Please, call Child Protective Services! I've grown up in an abusive house and I can tell you that abuse affects the mental health of the child/teen. Please call the police, anyone that can save her! Good luck. Call social services ASAP. Oh and video everything (like others have said) you see and report it to the police.
Poor girl i juss want to go n get her an bring her to my house...il take care of her of the mom dnt want her...she so young n going thro alot.
video tape what you can as well off your phone. What you witness, catch on tape. Take pics of the girl when she is hurt. This 'mother' (used lightly) sounds to out of her mind to notice what you are doing but be careful anyway so she doesn't cut off contact with you.
The foster system is pretty terrible for a lot of girls too but it has to be better than this.
ugh, I'll say a prayer for this girl. Terrible.
The foster system is pretty terrible for a lot of girls too but it has to be better than this.
ugh, I'll say a prayer for this girl. Terrible.
Sorry, I hadn't seen your posts; I think our last two crossed in the ether. I wasn't trying to correct you, just to amplify what I had said in my earlier post.
In other words, if this thing hits the news, the Internet or the paper, the police and child protective agencies will be ashamed and will have to act. And a reporter telling the story instead of you, will be a neutral third party with no axe to grind. Get an investigative reporter who writes long feature stories.
Since no one has cooperated try getting your local newspaper interested. And use Facebook if you can. Publicity is the answer.
I'd call the police if the Children's Services will not do anything. Things cannot be so horrible in your country that something like this looks average. This is gothic and tragic by any standards.
If nothing else will move the police and the Children's Services division, contact a newspaper. Get a reporter to meet the girl and see her living situation and write up the story.
If nothing else will move the police and the Children's Services division, contact a newspaper. Get a reporter to meet the girl and see her living situation and write up the story.
One thing I don't understand is, for someone who says they're not "involved", you have a LONG list of very explicit details of things that have happened behind closed doors.
I agree 100% that the authorities need to handle the situation. Keep contacting them until this girl is removed from the situation.
Prayers for that poor child. What a tragic, horrid situation.
I agree 100% that the authorities need to handle the situation. Keep contacting them until this girl is removed from the situation.
Prayers for that poor child. What a tragic, horrid situation.
OMG. Please call your local (your version of) the Division of Family Services. Tell them what you know. Let THEM go and take care of this volatile situation, as they are trained to do. - Blu
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