Lost

Hi all.  Today at work they made us do these personality profile things, where you have a group of words and you circle the one that best describes you.  It was fun until I realized that on every one I had to stop and think "is this the real me or what I am like on pills"?  It shocked me that I don't even know myself anymore.  All I know is the "high me"  and that is all I have known for a while.  When I thought more about it, I started wondering if anyone else felt the same way.  It is amazing how much this addiction can rob you of yourself.  It is almost enough to make me quit, just to get to know myself again.  Well, that is about all I have to say right now.  I guess I will go read some of yall's posts.

[lady_m]

Wow, I’ve never thought about that.  I have taken a test like that before…before I was an addict.  It’s true.  I would have a hard time answering wondering which Jen I was talking about.  Am I leader or a follower?  Hm, well the high Jen will take the stage and take charge any time.  The other Jen is a follower who doesn’t want to stand out.  Favorite place to travel?  High Jen – anywhere fun, fast and where I can be the life of the party.  The other Jen – somewhere calm where I can kick back and don’t have to do a whole lot.

You’ve got me thinking – I could fill out two completely different profiles and be talking about two very different people.  The high me and the not high me.  

That was a good post.  You’ve got me thinking.  Now I need to figure out who I REALLY am!

You know, I think I'm going to try to find one of those online and fill one out for each way and sit there and think about the differences.

Thanks again for a great post.

[TimH2]

I have felt that way for over 6 months. I don't enjoy the things that I loved and am only happy when I first take the pills or get my new bottle. The reason I am quitting is that I am robbing my family of ME. It will take time to get back to the old me and hope that I can come back 95%. I will always be an addict now and have to look at myself in that way. I am Mr Denial and it has to change. I don't want my grandchildren saying "Grandpa is grouchy because he takes medicine" or something along those lines. I have had enough of this. You have given me some food for thought tonight.

Thanks,

Tim

[road2recovery]

very interesting...i bet we all need to take the quiz..i am like jen, i think mine would defintely be two different people.
but i would like to hope i can be the real me soon...i am not sure who she is, BUT i am determined to find her...NO matter what it takes..
R2R
Good luck