advice please

[PedroH]

My Grandmother has some form of dementia and I don't really know what the right way of handeling some of her behaviors. One thing that seems to be a constant is that she seems happy to be angry-nothing is ever right.I try to find the "silver lining" but she will have none of it.She is very paranoid-everyone is whispering about her-& lately she is very demanding.This morning she phoned me @7:30 and wanted laundry soap and when I said I would get her some later she said "forget it!'& hung up on me.She would have me running all day everyday &still find more things for me to do. She feels like she has no problems with her memory & I am the one who is "out to lunch" I know this is the disease talking but I'm getting frustrated none the less.Could someone please give me some helpful hints? Thanks so much for your time in advance!

[heartfluttersflyawayplz]

I to  know how you feel as i have a mother who has had it for awhile, and yes we have gone throught all your saying. funny how they can be so sweet almost their self and than they become someone we dont know and dont want to know.
my mom has gone throught it to, shes very demanding for what ever she needs at that time. i can tell you this there is no telling them you will get it later . it must be done than. they do not understand the later part. the brain just knows at that moment that it needs to be done. what i have learn to do is say ok mom we will get that and sometimes she will let it go for a hour or two, she forgets but if i say mom i will do it later than that sets her off so you need to agree and see how that goes.

I would not let her be byself anymore , sounds like shes not thinking in a way that she can be byself. she could cook and forget and burn her and house down. neod on the once o essh ght. doe ssheht .do essheht. does she have long term care? if so they will pay for someone to come in everyday and be with her and at night to.

its very hard on us care takers and ya need to remember to give yourself time to, eat /rest and get your time out. i hope you have a great weekend

[PedroH]

Thanks so much for your response. I do have home care coming in once a day as well as going there myself,as well as doing her shopping,paying bills,taking her to appts etc...There is no one else to do it & I'm fast burning out & funny how the people in the family that are of no help are always so critical.-Sorry-just venting- Anyway,I am just feeling that she is really not safe staying by herself anymore,she refuses to live with me & I don't know how to convince her to go to assisted living Any suggestions?    Bless you for taking on what you have with your grandmother,you are too young to have to deal with this s**t! You take time for you too!   Take care!

[meljean816]

Hi.

My grandmother is going threw the same thing. Altho now she cant remember a number to call so I am around her 24 hours a day if my mom cant.  All I can tell you is that she means nothing she says even if it hurts or is frustrating. Dont show her your mad or getting frustrated because that can make her moods worse. Its hard, I know I go threw it all day i even get hit some times and its draining i know.  also maybe look into getting a nurse to help you out. It is so much better when you have someone to help you out for a few hours.